A Will to Survive
by maximumred
Summary: Daryl's never ending angst is met head on by a strong willed Lacy as she relearns how to interact with people. Neither of them is looking for romance but cant help feeling that something is there between them. The question presented is who will cave first. Lacy is strong though she dosent see herself that way and Daryl is lonely though he refuses to acknowledge it. Theses two stubb
1. The Woods

Fatigue. Lacy never thought she'd see the day where that one word was the only thing she could think of. Her mind was plagued with a cloudy haze blocking out any thoughts except food, water, rest, walkers. She walked on light feet through the dense foliage of the Georgia forests keeping her eyes alert for any gust of wind or movement in a shadow that could pose a danger to her and her survival. That's all life was these days, plain and simple, survival. She had been walking for about a week straight now and still hadn't come across a road. There were no cabins or creeks to mark her distance just more and more trees. She knew if she made a distinct effort to walk in a straight line for as long as possible shed have to come across SOMETHING eventually. She lifted one foot after the other feeling the muscles in her legs resist her steps. She willed herself on but it wasn't going to be much longer before her body couldn't run on will alone. She nervously took her quiver from her back to count her arrows. Maybe she could hunt something to eat as long as she didn't stray from her determined straight line of travel. She stared hard at the 30 or so measly arrows she had left after having lost 20 or more over time. 30 was plenty but she didn't like seeing the number dwindle. She knew no matter how much her body begged her she couldn't' stop to rest even for a moment because she would most certainly pass out and be walker bait. Lacy took in a deep breath and closed her eyes, listening for the sounds of the wildlife she knew surrounded her. After just a few quiet moments Lacy's ears perked up, just over her right shoulder she could hear the rustle and chirps of some sort of bird. She turned around slowly raising her bow and pulling back the string until it touched her cheek. Her feet were below her hips her shoulders square and strong as she let the arrow sail through the air and hit the bird directly in the neck. The bird died with a gurgle as lacy watched it fall to the ground. Lacy's week arms released the bow and placed it lightly over her shoulder with a shake. Approaching her exciting new meal her heart fell. The bird was a crow. Superstition says cows are the messengers of death and some people back where she came from believed that the souls of the damned can inhabit crows although that part admittedly sounds a little silly. She sighed at the meal at her feet. She wasn't dumb enough to pass up her first meal of the day but the idea didn't sit right in her stomach. She carried the bird by its feet to the nearest clear spot where she planned to clean it and start a fire; at least the bird seemed nice and plump. As far as that bird knew the world hadn't changed a bit. As lacy walked around the perimeter of her temporary camp she allowed her mind to wander. The stack of fire wood under her arm was steadily growing with time; she let her guard down a fraction so as to allow her mind to drift. She had been decently fit when all this happened. She had been a swimmer and a rugby player throughout high school and college. She hadn't been remarkable but she was in the best physical shape of her life. She had a very steady balanced diet though which is a big contributor to her ability to gain muscle and strength. She looked back at the bird again with distaste. She couldn't really remember how old she was. She hadn't been keeping track of the days so she may have turned 27 by now. It seemed that spring had begun to turn back into summer which means any day now could be her birthday. She ran her free hand over her fiery auburn hair that was matted and tangled from her travels. She had originally put it in a ponytail some weeks back and since had lost the hair tie within her matted rats nest. The clothes she wore weren't hers. She wondered who had packed them on their way out of Atlanta. Had they left them behind? Or had they turned? Were they still alive somewhere? Were these their favorite pants? She had worn in the sturdy Levis quite a bit they had begun to hold the shape of her belongings in her pockets. Her Swiss army knife laid flat against the bottom of her back right pocket. The boots on her feet had a different story. One far more depressing than the mystery jeans. She had seen these boots immediately after the outbreak attached to some feet. Her first thought after the police started lining the streets was get to Gander Mountain. She was ashamed that her first instinct was looting but she knew that the supplies there were about to become invaluable and that she wasn't going to be the only person with the idea. She was a person with no close family or friends which gave her a head start while others gathered their families. When she arrived at the store the automatic doors were continually opening and closing on the body that lay carelessly in the doorway. She felt nausea threatening to take over but held her breath while she slipped past it. In the store she heard things being knocked from shelves and a few small groups of people yelling to each other. She was glad that there didn't seem to be as many people as she had expected. She felt her heart racing as she slowly walked with her back to the wall down a couple aisles grabbing a hiking pack with a buckle around the hips to hold some other supplies. She was starting to think she would get out unnoticed when she turned down another aisle and met another person head on. They were just as surprised as her meeting her stare. He was about her height 5'9" or 5'10" sort of scrawny and weaselly with a dark head of curls above eyes that were almost black. She took a step backwards only to see the man's face morph into something cold and inhuman as he took in her back pack her sleeping bag and her bow. His dark eyes had hate in them and his face a scowl much like the one she'd seen every day of her childhood. She pulled out her hunting knife from her floppy fashion boot just as he lunged forward. She watched in horror as the metal pierced his cotton blue shirt below the ribs. The shirt was being over taken by red wetness and her hands shook with fear. The man's eyes were dinner plates as he fell to his knees in front of her gasping for air. The hunting knife had gone up into his lung from under his ribs. She rushed to his aid her hands fluttering around unsure what she should do to help him. He tried to speak but couldn't between gasps and gurgles. Lacy eyes filled with tears she wanted to stop the bleeding but didn't know if she should take the knife out. She decided to take it out and try and put pressure on the wound. Blood seeped over her hands uninhibited but her efforts. She watched the light leave his eyes and sat back in horror on the floor. She was covered in blood and had touched her face smearing it unknowingly across her forehead. What had she just done? She was a murderer. She quickly looked around knowing this guy was quite possibly not alone. She'd been through most the store only stopping now to grab the trail food and cooking gear she could manage to carry on her back. She was about to flee the store blood covered knife in hand when his boots caught her eye. They were really expensive high end hiking boots. Water proof, Insulated, steel toe, something like that would easily be the best foot wear for where she planned to go which was as far from the infected people as possible. As far from cities and roads as she could manage to navigate. She hesitated, thinking about the shoes and whether they would even fit her. The idea of surviving was what drove her to take them off his feet and try them on quickly as the man continued to bleed next to her. They were a tad loose but a good fit none the less. The little man had small feet lucky for her. These shoes must have translated to a woman's ten which is the size she wore. Her new boots on and her knife tucked safely into them she began to trace the outer wall back to the front of the store only barley managing to escape before hearing the discovery of the man and her boots behind her. She closed her ears to the screams of anguish and pushed forward to safety. The snap of a twig brought her back from her thoughts in an instant. Her eyes quickly scanned the horizon as she crouched low to the ground. Something was off she just couldn't place what. She racked her brain. Then it hit her, that sound in the background. What was that sound. She listened hard for another short moment before quickly standing up and spinning around drawing back her bow. She stood there with a crossbow pointed directly at her face. The sound of breathing had been what tipped her off. He must move quietly if his breathing was what she had heard. A tall man with dirty blond hair and blue eyes stood in front of her. His eyes unwavering over his weapon he made a quick gesture to the crow with his cross bow. "Hope ya don't plan ta eat that." He said flatly. "What's it to you?" she replied shortly with a scratchy voice that had long been out of use. "Go 'head then" he said with a southern accent "but them things are crawlin' with diseases." Her poker face briefly faltered as she realized he was right. She couldn't tell if he had noticed but she wouldn't let it happen again. Times like now you cannot show weakness without painting a target on your back. He watched her with skilled eyes. His knees were bent his muscles tensed. He was ready to do whatever he had to. He looked at her for a long while in silence. Her bow was held high and aimed right between his eyes. Neither one made a move or said a word for a moment that seemed to drag on forever. He scanned behind her looking for others. He saw her fire wood and her pack leaning against a tree some 20 feet away. Lacy's breathing was steady. She didn't take her eyes off the stranger. They were both feeling each other out waiting to see who would move first. They both had killed before and would do it again if it meant surviving. Finally he let out in a low grunt. "How many are ya?" "What?" she replied not knowing what he meant by that. He hadn't lowered his weapon or his eyes when he reworded the question. "Are ya alone?" She thought about how to answer that unsure if telling him the truth was safe. Would he kill her if he knew she wouldn't be missed or looked for? Would he kill her if he found out she was lying. He saw her hesitating. "The truth, now. Or ill spear you like a fish." He jabbed at her slightly with his weapon. He saw her grip tighten around her bow as he did it. He hadn't forgotten that she could easily kill him right now but he wouldn't be intimidated by some women alone in the woods. Something in her eyes changed as she said "Yea-yes I'm alone." "How long ya been alone fer?" He asked with his eyes narrowed. Both of their arms were begging to grow tired as they held every muscle perfectly still and tension surged between them. "A while." She replied shortly. She wasn't lying and she honestly didn't think she could have been more specific. How long had it been really? A few weeks? A few months? She couldn't really tell anymore and that aside she had been alone for a while before, only joining one group briefly since the world had ended. "You best get that out my face real soon 'fore things get ugly." He said with his deep husky voice. "Lower your weapon first or ill be the one making things ugly" she countered. He narrowed his eyes at her again. She was tough. He could see that much was true. She looked like shed been out here alone for a while so he didn't have trouble believing that but she still posed a threat to him and the group back at the prison. Suddenly they heard a whistle and two men approached from behind them. She saw how he didn't move his weapon or skip even one breath. She knew immediately that the whistle had been a warning to him that they were approaching. She couldn't see any other reason someone so alert would allow anyone or anything to walk up behind him. Her eyes flickered between all of them landing on the one in front of her the most still worried he may shoot her at any moment . "what's goin' on here Daryl?" a tall thin man asked with one hand up in surrender the other lightly hovering near his holster. He slowly approached the two locked in arms with a much stronger and taller black man by his side. "Beast's givin' me lip." The one apparently named Daryl answered. The new comer met Daryl's eyes for only a second before putting both his hands on the ends of their weapons and saying "Let's all put our weapons down and talk for a second." She looked between the men rapidly. They seemed to be fed and relatively clean considering the way she looked. All the possibilities were running through her mind. What if they were going to rob her and leave her? What if they were going to rape and kill her? She looked at all of them a little harder noticing the laugh lines by the thinner one's eyes. He had come in without his weapon raised and was now asking to talk. He seemed level headed but could she trust that. All of the men watched her to see what she would do. She quickly realized that she was out numbered out gunned and would easily be over powered. Even if she did manage to kill Daryl before the others could stop her, what good would it do? They would only be crueler if she were responsible for his death. With a sigh she gave up and put down her bow stepping back into a normal stance and feeling the blood rush back to her finger tips now that she wasn't squeezing her bow to keep herself from running away. With her weapon lowered she saw Daryl slowly lower his crossbow keeping it loaded but pointed down. Both the man in the back and the one, who stood almost between her and Daryl, looked relived. Daryl's face was unreadable though as he turned to Speak to both the strangers in a raspy whisper. There were nods all around and Daryl stalked away a few feet and leaned against a tree. "My name is Rick" The man who appeared to be in charge said. He had a posture that soldiers aspire to and looked to be sincere. "This here is Daryl and that's Tyreese" He motioned over his shoulder to the brawniest man there. "We aren't going to hurt you" he continued. "We have a camp not too far from here with women and children. Daryl tells me that you're alone out here. If you'd like you could come back with us. So long as you'll answer a few questions first" Lacy blinked for a second the aches and fatigues in her body finally beating out the adrenaline she had been running on this whole time. She blinked hard to keep her eyes focused and nodded her head knowing that even though she didn't think she would stay with these people she need to sleep and eat soon or she wasn't going to make it much longer. Ricks eyebrows furrowed as he really took her in for the first time. She seemed to be very pale and her eyes were glazed. She could clearly use some food and rest. He watched her hands shake slightly and sympathy washed over him. He had been hard on many a new comer but that's because groups have proven to be dangerous for his people. This woman was on her own though surely they could handle her if she tried anything. Ricks main concern was that she wasn't actually alone but Daryl had seemed pretty sure of it when he had told Rick and Rick trusted Daryl's instincts more than his own sometimes. "How many walkers have you killed?" 


	2. Filthy Swamp Bitch

"How many walkers have you killed?"

Daryl watched her closely as she answered Rick's questions. He had been tracking her for nearly an hour to see if she met up with anyone. His crossbow was still ready, Ricks back was facing him but he had no doubt that he could shoot her over Ricks shoulder in an instant should he need to. He'd never admit it but she was a good shot. He himself had been hunting when he heard her walking. He watched her go through the woods alert despite her clearly being in rough shape. Once he saw her take out the crow He knew she may really be dangerous. Anyone who is a good shot like that has had plenty of practice. He shifted his weight and waited for Rick to give the word. Tyreese passed between two trees watching for walkers in the distance.

"I don't know "She answered in a weak whisper.

"Can you estimate? Was it 10? 20?" Rick prompted her for more information. Rick looked at with genuine interest. She shook her head eyes down at the ground as she thought about the number, memories flashing through her mind as she recalled each and every time she had been overrun by walkers. Sometimes taking out as many as 30 in the span of a couple hours. She was mildly annoyed at his underestimation of her but chalked it off as sexism in the south.

"Must be a couple hundred by now" She said with a cold empty voice. Each man seemed to be caught off guard by her answer Tyreese let out a slow whistle and Daryl's eyebrows rose. Hundreds? Her? No way had she done all that on her own she must have been with a group at some point. Then the image of the crow went though his mind again with the arrow in its neck. She hadn't even looked for more than a split second before she released her arrow, all things considered maybe she really was capable of something like that. Rick turned to look for Daryl's reaction. Rick was unsure what to make of that, should he consider her dangerous or an asset? Daryl just shrugged and nodded. Rick went on with the interrogation but Daryl didn't pay attention. He wasn't particularly interested in this pathetic girl nor did he really want to bring her back so they could struggle to keep her alive. He told himself that the only reason he hadn't killed her was because the group sorely needed another hunter but somewhere in his mind he knew that wasn't true. Daryl had always been rough around the edges, cold even but he had never been a murderer. No, he killed in self defense. Another stick snapped and now every set of eyes quickly scanned the surroundings. It was the wild looking girl who saw it first; a walker was slowly ambling towards them from behind where she had been standing. Daryl quickly lifted his crossbow and in the same instant that he fired Lacy aimed and shot the walker straight through the eye. The walker hit the ground two arrows in its head. It never stood a chance. Daryl stalked over to the corpse irritated and grumbling keeping an eye out for any others before pulling his arrow out of its head.

"I had it taken care of" He stated rather flatly. She glared at him saying nothing but eyeing her own arrow. Daryl scuffed and left hers where it was kicking he corpse before heading back.

"I aint no retriever neither" He loomed over her as he passed clearly displaying his distaste. Rick ignored Daryl he was used to his guarded nature and no-nonsense attitude. He knew it would only take time to soften him up. He always treated new people this way, hell he treated the group this way half the time. Rick was the only one he really truly respected. Rick new Daryl would give his life to save him and that being said Rick would do the same for Daryl.

"We'd better move on before any others find out we're here" Rick said in a way that made it plain Lacy wasn't to argue it. Lacy was relieved she had passed the questioning part of the day for now. Knowing full well how badly these men wanted to leave the woods and head back before dark. She knew better than anyone how dangerous the woods got at night. She had no idea how far they needed to travel but she knew night wasn't that far off an hour maybe two tops. Quickly as she could manage she retrieved her arrow placing it back in her quiver and gathered up her pack. Putting it back on her shoulders she remembered how heavy it was. How heavy she was all together. Her arms were straining to buckle it around her waist to help her carry the weight evenly on her hips. Every step made her heavier. Her eye lids each weighing pounds. She licked her dry lips. She could feel eyes boring into her back as she turned around and took her spot in line with the men who appeared to have been talking. Ricks hand thrust a water bottle in front of her and she took it greedily, drinking the entire bottle in three large gulps. Daryl shook his head and turned away. She looked at the empty bottle guiltily looking back to Rick she only now realized she probably drank all this man's water. The sweet sensation of water on her dry throat had made her forget her manners or maybe it was all the time she had spent alone.

"Sorry." She said feebly handing the water bottle back to Rick. He looked amused as he shook his head.

"Don't be I got more besides we don't need you kickin' it before we get back" She didn't dare ask for more though her mouth watered at the idea.

"Come on this way we'll lead you back to camp" He motioned for her to come with him to the front of the group. They passed Daryl who lingered behind picking up a rabbit he had just shot and adding it to the ones he carried at his waist. The tall burly man named Tyreese stood near her and a small amount of safety washed over Lacy. Tyreese could probably just squish zombies with his bare hands for Christ's sake. She watched Rick as he walked beside her. He had an air about him that just screamed authority. He had dark brown shortish hair with a manly scruffy beard and as thin as he was he still looked very strong. All three of these men were strong. She remembered her 1st group and how even the head of that group was just a fishermen. There was no wonder why these men had survived this long. The 4 of them walked on in silence for a long while. They only sounds around them were the whisper in the leaves and the faint sounds of trickling water. The creek she had been looking for must be up ahead. Maybe this camp is in the cabin she was waiting for too. She wondered if she had been left to wander would she have stumbled onto this camp they were leading her too? Or would she have just passed it never realizing they were so close by. She took a deep breath getting more and more out winded as she tried to keep pace with these men.

"Whats' a'matter red? Can't keep up?" Daryl taunted as he passed her and took the lead of the group. She wasn't about to honor that with a reply. Clearly this ass hole just wanted to start trouble let off some steam or whatever. That didn't mean she had to cooperate. When the remark was only met with silence he grunted

"That's what I thought". She saw the way he slung his crossbow over his shoulder and carried himself with a steadiness and sureness that she hadn't seen in a while. She hadn't seen ANYONE who wasn't a stumbling zombie in a while. She saw light coming through the trees up ahead and understood they must be approaching a clearing. The sound of water was much louder now. The light hit her eyes and forced her to put a hand up. She hadn't left the dense forest yet but her eyes couldn't adjust. She blinked furiously and tried to get her vision back. She couldn't see the others and wasn't sure if they had stopped and were waiting or if she was being left behind. A sudden panic hit her as she realized just how much she wanted to go with them. She didn't know till then just how high her hopes had gotten. She tried to stifle them knowing that letting them get the best of her would only leave her hurt. Daryl's watchful eyes missed nothing. He saw as she tried to adjust to the light outside of the woods. It was even more obvious how true her story was now. He exchanged a look with Rick who seemed to believe it now too. She looked like she had been sleeping in trees. There were bits of leaves and sticks in her hair and her body was caked in dirt. He looked her over for limping or injuries but it seemed the thing that had been holding her back on the walk was just weakness. She looked like she may fall over at any minute and all Daryl knew was he wasn't about to carry her in to the prison. So he waited as patiently as he could with the others for her to adjust and catch her breath. A minute or two passed and he saw as she regained a feeling for her surroundings. A tense hand had been ready on her bow that whole time though he wasn't sure she noticed none of them had missed it. Tyreese was closest to her and he had prepared himself to take her down should she make any sudden movements. She moved forward with a meek smile towards Rick with her hands at her sides once again. They relaxed slightly as they proceeded to make the last couple yards until the prison was in view. She looked Stunned as she took in the fortified building and saw the waves from the guard towers. A smirk passed each of the men's lips as a feeling of pride and accomplishment went through them. This was their safe haven and as bad as life gets in this day and age, these were the moments when they really appreciated what they had. There was a young boy waiting to let them in the gates and there were walkers mulling about outside the fences so they walked quickly and quietly towards the entrance. Daryl took down a few walkers along the way though Lacy thought it might just have been for sport.

Lacy couldn't control the shaking of her hands any longer her whole body was vibrating as her hollow stomach turned itself over and over. There was nothing to digest but her own stomach lining; pain was shooting through her making it feel as though she had been drinking bleach. The last thing she had eaten was a small chipmunk yesterday morning and it had done nothing to sustain her. Now is not the time she pleaded with her body as her heart raced and tried to beat its way out of her chest. She fell to her knees as they approached the gate clutching her self tightly. An arrow whizzed over her and she heard a thunk behind her. With a quick glance she realized one of Daryl arrows had just saved her life. Before she could regain her footing she felt hands under her arms and she was thrown over a strong couldn't believe he was actually about to carry this chick into the prison after deciding against it earlier in the walk when he had seen how week she was. She closed her eyes relieved that they hadn't just left her. She was quickly losing the ability to stay conscious and gave in as the blackness around her vision finally took over. Daryl jogged with Lacy over his shoulder. If he had stayed at the front of the group she wouldn't be his problem right now. He grumbled to himself as he passed through the gate. He didn't stop to update the guards like Rick and Tyreese did, He continued on to find Hershel and get this chick off of his shoulder. Her ribs were sharp against his shoulder blade and her body much lighter than Daryl had anticipated. Just as he rounded the last corner to the cell block he saw Hershel.

"Aeh! Got a live one over here" Daryl half yelled. Hershel's wise eyes quickly accessed the situation while he unlocked the cell block doors.

"Bring her around this way" He gestured to a cell. Daryl set her down on the cot and was about to turn and leave when Hershel started asking him questions

"How long has she been out?"

"I dunno, couple a minutes" Daryl replied shortly.

"Has she been bit? Is she injured?" Hershel continued on.

"Nah I think she's just hungry and tired" Daryl was growing impatient with this conversation. He knew Hershel had a good reason for asking these questions but he didn't want to be the one answering had already done more for her then he had wanted, he had put himself in harms way for her and he hadn't even known her name. He was growing more and more pissed as he thought about it.

"Rick is on his way he'll know what's up" Daryl added finally to show that he was going to leave this conversation now. Hershel nodded before going over to the girl and checking her vital signs. Daryl's eyes lingered on her for another instant before he turned and stormed out of the cell. He knew he needed to leave the cell block now because once everyone got wind of the new comer they would all be looking for answers. He'd much rather let Rick handle that situation. He quickly grabbed a pot and exited the cell block making for the fields outside. He had 8 or 9 rabbits and squirrels bouncing off his leg where they hung, he could be preparing them to pass the time. With his sweaty back leaned up against the cool shady brick wall looking over the fields he let out a sigh. Life was so fast passed these days it was almost too much to keep up with He set down the pot and pulled out a pack of cigarettes from the right chest pocket of his sleeveless denim shirt, lighting one quickly and inhaling deeply. With his lungs filled with smoke he felt his head clear slightly and he exhaled through his nose. The one none essential thing he always kept when he found it scouting was cigarettes. Only a small piece of his old life but a piece he didn't mind remembering.

He sat down against the wall and began skinning the first squirrel. His quick nimble fingers moved with precision separating what could be eaten from what couldn't. The meat was placed in the pot for boiling the excess tossed on the ground. It looked like they were going to be having stew that night and probably in the morning too. With so many mouths to feed the squirrels and rabbits weren't going to cut it anymore. Daryl knew he needed to start finding bigger animals or maybe just more animals but its tough hunting when the people you bring with you stomp around and scare everything away. He would normally hunt alone but Rick had decided no one was to leave alone anymore for safety reasons, except for Michonne who apparently didn't have to follow the rules. Daryl brooded to himself moving onto the next squirrel. He heard a noise to his left and quickly shot up off the ground his cigarette still hanging in his mouth. Glenn approached him cautiously

"Ricks holding a meeting to talk about Lacy" Glenn said with his eyes on Daryl's catch.

"The fuck is Lacy" Daryl grumbled finishing the squirrel he had just abandoned a moment before.

"The girl you saved" Glenn said with his arms crossed

"I Didn't save nothin' just huntin's all "Daryl protested taking another drag.

"I don't care who saved her there's a meeting inside in 10." Glenn turned and left without another word. He'd gotten to be much less timid since the winter. Daryl approved but hadn't said anything about it to anyone. Daryl passed a hand over his face and gathered his belongings before heading in. If Glenn knew her name she must be awake, Daryl thought. He hadn't expected her to make it through the night let alone be alert so quickly or rather immediately. Putting out his cigarette he meandered on back to the cell block taking his time hoping to miss at least some of the meeting. When he entered the block he saw dozens of eyes on him as Rick said.

"Good you're here, now we can start" Daryl grumbled under his breath as tossed the belt of rabbits and squirrels on to a table next to the pot, He perched on the railing at the base of the stairs towards the back of the group who had gathered for Ricks meeting. Quickly questions started shooting from all directions.

"Who is she?" Maggie asked sternly with not even a sliver of trust in her eyes.

"We aren't sure yet" Rick answered bluntly. He then added.

"All she said before passin' out again was that her name was Lacy"

"How can we trust her?" Maggie shot back again. This time Tyreese answered.

"You guys didn't trust me at first either. I had to earn it. So let her earn it. She's alone what kind of threat could she be"

"Ya saw her shoot that bow didn't ya?" Daryl scuffed before continuing as all eyes fell on him.

"Seems pretty dangerous ta me"

"So we take away her weapons for the time bein'" Rick replied not letting Daryl's doubts get under his skin.

"How did she end up alone like that?" Carols voice rang though the cell block with the most sympathy they had heard yet. Rick shook his head looking sorrowful as he said

"I don't know exactly what happened to her but she's been through hell. The least we can do is let her gain her strength before sendin' her on her way"

"You can't make her leave" Beth said from the upper level of the cell block

"You might as well kill her yourself; did you see how weak she was? Daddy says she wouldn't have made it another three days out there". Beth rocked baby Judith lightly while she spoke. Rick pinched the bridge of his nose and said

"I haven't finished asking her the questions I gotta ask her yet either. Maybe it's best if we wait for her to wake up before we deiced what we should do next" Daryl hopped down from the railing sauntering forward a few steps and said

"You'd best lock that cell overnight then, I don't trust that filthy swamp bitch as far as I can throw her" Ricks patients was wearing thin as he shot his head up and said

"Good, you'll take first watch"


	3. Difference Between Surviving and Living

Daryl stood outside Lacy's cell in the dark. The only light to see by was the small amount of natural light coming through the windows high up on the cell block walls. He hadn't woken Glenn up to switch shifts yet because he knew he wasn't going to be able to sleep that night. He continued sharpening his arrows just like he had been for the past 4 hours. He took his time slowly cleaning and pampering each arrow to keep busy while he kept watch over his sleeping camp mates. Lacy stirred for the first time in hours, her eyes fluttered open as she tried to remember where she was. She lifted a heavy hand to her face and rubbed her eyes. The weakness she had been feeling only slightly lifted. The subtle movements caught Daryl's eye from across the small hall sized landing in front of the second floor cell. His eyes lingered on the cell but ultimately he decided it wasn't worth getting up. The door was locked, she had no weapon and yet he was stuck sitting outside her cell like a guard dog. Still sharpening his arrows he waited for her to fall back asleep but to his surprise he heard soft feet touch down on the cement floors, she was up. He looked back to her cell again more interested now than he had been all night. She approached the cell bars, confusion in her eyes.

"Welcome back sweet cheeks" He said sarcastically without a hint of a smile on his face. He still hadn't bothered to move. Lacy didn't say anything she turned back around and immediately began a search of the cell. Where were her belongings, her bag, her shoes, her weapons? Panic began to climb up her throat and wrap its icy fingers around her lungs. She began throwing around the blankets lifting up her mattress frantically trying to find anything to protect herself with. Dust was stirred up around her hovering in the air and forcing her to breathe raggedly trying not to cough. Who were these people? How long did they want to have her locked in a cell? Would she ever get out again? She had asked herself so many questions since meeting these people and yet not a single one had been answered yet. She put her back to the cement walls trying to gain some kind of security or control over the situation. With one front covered they could only take her head on. All the commotion had drawn Daryl over to see what was going on. He peered in her dark cell taking in the ransacked furniture and her cowering against the back wall. She was clearly terrified. Eyeing the walls and bars with disgust Daryl understood why she would be reacting that way. He still didn't like sleeping in a cell although he no longer refused entirely like he had when they had first moved in. With a heavy sigh he pulled the keys out of his pocket jingling them at her. He saw her eyes immediately zero in on the set of small keys. He had been thinking all night about his suggestion to lock her in the cell. He would do what he had to when it came to protecting his people, when a threat was presented he stomped it out but he didn't like having to lock anyone so defenseless in a cell. It felt a little harsh.

"Feelin' trapped?" He asked her flatly. Knowing before she responded that the answer was yes. She nodded her head before realizing he probably couldn't see her. She cleared her throat a little before finally answering him.

"yea-yes" He put a hand on the bars, muscles tensed in a defensive way and said

"I aint givin' you no weapons and I sure as hell aint plain' no games with yall" He paused clearly thinking something over before finally finishing with a raspy southern drawl.

"But I'll let ya outta there fer a little bit as long as ya don't pull no funny business on me" She began to step forward hesitantly into dim light nodding to him. She kept her hands up in surrender; all she wanted was to be out of the cell. She didn't trust these people but she knew that she had to try, for now at least, if she wanted out. She was thrilled at the idea of interacting with another person she had all but convinced herself that there weren't any left. She was alone for so long she forgot all about how it felt to listen to the rumble of another human's voice. That instant comfort of another human's presence was irreplaceable. She was already feeling the claustrophobia lifting as she watched the key turn in the lock. She felt a hope inside her that she hadn't experienced in months. Quietly the door squeaked on its hinges as it was opened slowly. He had a hand tightly grasping the handle of his knife still tucked into his waistband. He didn't trust her either that much was clear but she appreciated the gesture of unlocking the cell. She slowly walked out of the cell onto the landing with Daryl. She lightly rested her hands on the railing feeling the cold rough metal beneath her sweaty palms. Taking in her surroundings her eyes sweeping over every surface and cell door she saw the evidence that they weren't alone. The rest of the people who lived here must be asleep she thought. Daryl relaxed slightly leaning against the railing. He eyed her, curiosity getting the best of him he asked

"What happened to ya?" She paused pursing her lips and furrowing her eyebrows unsure of how to answer such a vague question. She moved her hands in a wringing motion on the railing. What happened to her she asked herself again trying to form a halfway decent answer. She had been attacked time and time again by rotting flesh puppets, she had nearly starved to death, she and nearly froze to death, she had lost any inkling of where she was and had almost given up entirely on the idea of ever living a normal life again. She had personally watched the only decent humans she had met since the outbreak get eaten while she ran like a coward. She had killed more zombies than she could count and more spineless men than anyone ever should have to.

"I got lost." She answered simply. She could feel her conversational skills failing her. She wasn't sure if she had meant lost physically or as a person but it didn't really matter either way.

"How'd ya end up alone out there?" She looked over seeing only mild interest on his face. She sighed heavily feeling the weight of her heart on her words.

"I started that way" She averted her eyes from him looking around for anything to occupy her mind. Her eyes hovered over the simple curtains hanging by each cell door in an attempt to bring a homey feeling to these dreary cement cell blocks. She admired their spirit; Hope was evident in the carefully hung clothing she now viewed. They were maintaining what they could of the life they used to have. That was more than she could say for herself, She had barley been surviving. She had behaved like an animal for so long trying to blend in, it was jarring for her to have to try and recall the part of her that made her human. Though there was a time in her life before all this happened when that was the case too. She shook her head to try and knock loose the image of her father's face. She didn't need to think about him now, not tonight. She felt so vulnerable like a child again wanting nothing more than to hide behind the strength of numbers. She could feel eyes on the side of her face but she continued to look out over the railing. The tone of his voice was different now as he said.

"Shit outta luck from the start then huh?"

She scuffed for a second rolling her eyes a little at his sarcastic joke but sensing a small amount of sincerity behind his words. He didn't know how accurate his words really were. She had been shit out of luck from an early age and only managed to gain any feeling of truly being herself out in those woods she so desperately wanted to escape now. The thought of having to go back there ever again gave her a chill. The woods that had shown her just how strong she could be had almost killed her and she couldn't bear the silence out there again without risking losing her mind. Daryl couldn't seem to figure out what Lacy was thinking. Every time she spoke she left him with more questions than answers and she hardly ever said more than 3 words.

"Yes I guess you could say that" She replied

"If we are going to be asking questions I have a few of my own." She waited eyes finally falling back on the man next to her. Daryl saw her hard set jaw knowing now she was a straight to the point girl. Not that the short answers hadn't been a solid hint. He fought back a smirk and said nothing an arrow firmly in his grasp his eyes never leaving hers as he continued to sharpen it. Daryl observed her without feeling any remorse he was on 'watch' wasn't he? Right now it was his job to be curious. He had been taking more interest in the others lately and found that his new found sociability applied to her too. Lacy remembered his comment about not giving her weapons so she decided to push those questions to the back of her mind for the time being.

"Well I guess my first question is why did you have me locked in a cell?"

"Fer safe keepin'" He replied. The question was a stupid one in his opinion, it was obvious why she had been locked up she was danger to everyone there. He didn't bother elaborating. She moved on already not bothering trying to decipher his cryptically short answers. She assumed correctly when she thought he meant to protect his people from her which she couldn't deny made complete sense.

"How many people live here?" she tried again.

"A bunch, prolly 30 or so". She felt excitement wash over her. A group of that many people meant safety but most of all it meant food. Her stomach grumbled, she only vaguely remembered eating something earlier that day. Her memory was patchy and fuzzy from the moment her life was saved onward. She knew she had been brought into the prison and that at some point people had been touching her neck and her arms. She had tried to push them off but she was weak and hadn't succeeded. She remembered mumbling as questions were asked. She had only wanted to go back to sleep but they hadn't let her. She couldn't remember what she said but she knew she hadn't lied, she wasn't awake enough to lie. She worried slightly about what she may have revealed. She relived again her last clear memory. The arrow in the walkers head behind her, he had been watching her back when she hadn't. She remembered hearing the arrow cut through the air above her head. The sun had been so high in the sky then. How long had it been?

"Thank you" She offered softly.

"Fer what?" he asked in that same raspy flat whisper.

"For saving my life today, for letting me out of that cell. For not killing me. Everything" Daryl hadn't been expecting a thank you. He didn't know how to reply. 'You're welcome' was a lie and anything else wasn't worth wasting the breath. She didn't want to look at him now instantly regretting mentioning it and growing more uncomfortable as the seconds pass. Daryl felt the air between them changing before he could do anything to fix it. Now he wished he had just lied. Lacy didn't like being in debt to people. She had always been the kind of person who fended for themselves. Knowing just how much she owed this man she had only just met put her in a position she spent her whole life trying to avoid. Should she have just pretended she didn't remember? She at least could have saved herself this horrible awkward conversation. When after another long moment he still hadn't said anything she snapped with inpatients. She hated the feeling she had in her stomach. The feeling of suspenseful waiting for him to tell her it was okay, to take the debt she held away from her but he didn't and she knew that he wasn't going to. It had been so long since she had had a conversation like this one she was completely out of her element.

"Look I'm not going to say it again so I hope you heard me the first time."She awkwardly began picking at her nail beds hoping she seemed aloof.

"Don't get yer panties in a twist" he replied shortly. He knew that he had been wrong to say nothing at all but his defensiveness often bypassed his brain to mouth cheeks flushed red at the mention of underwear. She placed her hand on the side of her face blocking him from seeing her blush. She felt anger bubbling up in her but not at him as much as herself. She was growing frustrated with her own inability to talk to him. She took in one last deep breath before deciding that she was getting far too worked up. She took in the quiet night air and leaned forward on the rail. Daryl didn't know what to tell her. He considered going back to switch his shift over to Glenn. In a way he liked watching her fumble over her words. It was usually him who couldn't talk to people. He waited in the silence that seemed to keeping falling between them. When her eyes met his again he gave her a nod not knowing how else to communicate with her. Lacy desperately wanted to feel accepted into this group attaching a lot of meaning to his casual gesture. She continued on with the questions to try and fill the air between them.

"So is that Rick guy in charge around here?"

"Pretty much but we all get a say in things" Daryl shrugged

How bad could that be Lacy thought to herself? Back before the apocalypse politics sucked maybe they got better once they were brought down to their roots. Sure corruption becomes hard to prevent but small government is always better. She watched the sky grow brighter. She wondered what this coming day held in store for her.

"Where'd ya learn ta shoot" Daryl asked still feeling he hadn't learned anything about her. She thought about the bow she carried and had been carrying since the outbreak. Originally she hadn't' known what made her grab the bow rather than a gun. It didn't take her long after picking it up to realize though.

"Summer camp" Lacy started. She hesitated before continuing with more detail this time.

"I went every summer for 5 years. They gave us a choice between riflery and archery and for some reason I'd always picked archery. I really preferred the feeling of the bow in my hands to the kick of a gun. Besides I couldn't aim the gun for shit." Daryl listened closely picturing kids learning to shoot for fun. Reality was much harsher now. You learned to shoot to survive. Kid or not the urgency and need to be able to protect yourself over powers almost any enjoyment shooting once held, even for him.

"They taught ya that at summer camp?" He asked with doubt in his voice.

"I wasn't very good at it until I had to be". She added.

Daryl started to feel the exhaustion catching up with him. He should really go get Glenn so he could grab at least a few measly hours of rest. He hadn't considered it for more than a moment or two before a slightly frazzled looking Glenn came bounding up the metal stairs making as little noise as he could while moving quickly.

"Why didn't you come wake me?" Glenn asked a little out of breath.

"Thought ya might need the sleep" Daryl brushed the question off. He wasn't going to acknowledge his trouble sleeping so he let Glenn think what he wanted from that. There was gratefulness in Glenn's eyes when he answered.

"Thanks man, go catch some Z's you look beat" Daryl didn't say anything as he slung his arrows over his shoulder again and started to slink out of view.

"A man of many words I see." Lacy said look at Daryl's back as it grew smaller. Glenn looked back and forth between her cell and her unsure of whether she should be out or not.

"I'm sorry but I think you should stay in your cell until Rick comes to talk to you" Glenn said in a resigned but stern voice. Glenn never wanted to be in charge but he couldn't stand by and just let things happen. If it was his watch he was going to take every precaution. That to him meant safely locking away the girl until it was really certain beyond a doubt that she didn't pose a threat to his new family. Lacy's stomach dropped at the idea of being cornered unable to fight herself to freedom once she was enclosed in stone. She took a deep breath with her eyes squeezed shut. She had to control her phobia. She didn't have the option of being scared or weak. What had to be done, had to be done and she wouldn't let herself fall apart. She thought of all the people below her peacefully sleeping in cells just like the one behind her. Regaining some of her resolve she nodded her head and swallowed loudly before quickly turning and reentering the cell. Glenn noticed how pale she looked but attributed it to her lack of nutrition out on her own. He followed her back to her cell before realizing Daryl had forgotten to leave the keys.

"Shit..." Glenn mumbled under his breath running a hand over his head. Leaving her alone there in the open cell seemed stupid but bringing her to fetch the key seemed even worse. With worry in his voice Glenn said to her.

"Please just stay in there I need to get the key from Daryl." He waited for her to confirm that she wouldn't go anywhere but Lacy had been so focused on taking deep calm breaths Glenn's words had gone in one ear and out the other. Glenn abruptly hit the bars causing her to jump a foot in the air feeling her skin crawl and her spine tingle, he had her full attention now.

"I'm going to get the keys, Do not leave this cell do you understand?" He stated slowly. She saw in his eyes a lack of conviction. He wasn't' as tough as he wanted her to believe he was. She didn't draw attention to it though not wanting to ruffle any feathers in the hopes that she could join this group at least for a little while. Glenn felt guilt pang in the pit of his stomach when he saw how badly he had startled her but he told himself he was only doing what Rick would have done. Rick didn't let anyone slip between his fingers because he stood his ground. Glenn had watched Rick from the first time they had met trying to learn from him. Rick had courage and strength that Glenn envied. She listened to the even sound of Glenn's footsteps fading. Being alone for this brief moment was almost a relief. Just this time yesterday she had been walking on pins and needles while her toes grew numb in the dew of the forest floor. She looked at the disheveled room before her, only now noticing the small cloth that had been lying on the bed side table. That little touch of décor made Lacy's heart heavier still. She placed the Cot back on its legs and lifted the dust dirty blanket off the floor; she tried to brush off some of the dirt before returning it to the end of the cot. She decided on resting her eyes again if only for a brief moment but soon found the need for sleep overshadowing her phobia. She was dozing off back into the deep sleep she hadn't seen in so long.

She shot straight up in bed with beads of sweat falling down the back of her neck. She had Goosebumps all over her body despite the sweating. She gasped for air frantically recalling the dream that she had just spent an eternity trapped in. What had woken her? She looked down at her hands as they trembled, in her dream she had been frantically clawing at the closed lid of a coffin. She scratched and scratched trying to break free. Her nails had fallen out along with all of her teeth. The walls pushed in on her from ever side. The air felt thin and no amount of panting brought her the oxygen her body craved. How long had she been trapped in there? She shook her head vigorously reminding herself that it hadn't really happened that she was alive and safely within the walls of this prison. Her lip twitched toward a smile as she considered the irony of her living situation. She wanted more than anything to stay in this prison. How many people who had slept in this same cell wanted precisely the opposite?

Her thoughts trailed off as she overheard muffled voices approaching from the left. She quickly decided to close her eyes and feign sleep. She wasn't ready yet after that dream to talk to anyone. She needed more time to gather herself to work up to all the talking she was going to have to do today. There were introductions, greetings, questions from every direction. Her mind was spinning already considering all of it. She waited for the footsteps to pass her cell but instead they stopped outside.

"Well it seems she's finally stopped screaming" an unfamiliar voice said from outside her cage. She was suddenly embarrassed. She hadn't known she yelled in her sleep, or said anything for that matter. Lacy wondered how long that had been going on. Her whole life for all she knew.

"Just in time fer the mornin'" Daryl's cynical voice added.

"Well you don't expect to put her to work this quickly do you? She passed out from exhaustion only yesterday. She needs rest." The mystery voice continued. She wondered what they meant by putting her to work. She was hard pressed to think of a role she could play in a group setting. She wasn't good at anything in particular.

"She can stay in there forever for all I care but I'll be damned if Ricks gonna want ta wait fer her ta wake up 'fore he comes and talks to her".

"I suppose your right." The old age in the second voice was apparent as was the weariness. Everyone seemed to be stretched pretty thin around her. For a moment she considered the idea that she may be of real use to these people. Somehow she might be able to lessen the load they each carried on their battered shoulders. A third pair of feet began to approach.

"Speak a the devil" Daryl mumbled quietly.

"Morning" She heard Rick say as he reached the men standing only feet from her. They all followed the movement of her ribs as she was breathing.

"Daryl I'm gonna need you for back up while I talk to her this mornin'" A soft confirming grunt came from deep within Daryl's throat before she head the tinkering of keys against each other. Lacy realized faking sleep was one thing but faking waking up was an entirely different thing. She was sure to be figured out as soon as she tried. She briefly considered the clichéd stretching yawn before giving up all together and slowly turning to face the men who were entering her cell. She saw an older gentle man with a receding hairline and a white ponytail in the far back of the group, she also saw that he had crutches and wondered where he found them in a day like today when things like that where one of the first to be looted.

"Lacy?" Rick asked gently

"How are you feeling?" She quickly accessed her body. Her shoulder muscles where tight and her calves felt stiff as well but all together she didn't feel bad at all. In fact just the opposite she felt the better now then she had felt in days. Sure she was a little tired but the men before her looked more tired then she felt at that moment. She met Ricks warm kind eyes with hers feeling nervous as she held his stare.

"I can't remember the last time I felt like this" She answered honestly. Rick smirked at her standing tall over her while she sat on her cot.

"I've asked you my main questions but there are still some things we need to go over" Lacy nodded flickering here eyes towards the slightly open door behind Rick. Rick didn't miss the motion and addressed it up front.

"Let's focus on this for now then we can see about cleaning you up and getting some breakfast in you" Lacy felt her heart jump into her throat. Her clothes were stiff with filth and her own stench reached her nose. She longed to scrub away the months of grim built up on her skin. Suddenly she was eager to talk to Rick with her sights set on a clean and full belly. Rick knew how lacy would react. As soon as he had offered her a shower and food she was putty in his hands.

"Everybody in this group has to pull their own weight. You will be expected to carry out some duties for this group and to help cover the watch shifts. Everyone has to take turns, children are the only exception".

"No problem" Lacy's voice cracked.

"You won't be getting your weapons back just yet" Rick's words brought them back to her mind. Lacy had almost forgotten about her bow with all that had been going on, after shoving it aside last night it had slipped her mind completely.

"When?" She asked simply.

"You'll get them back don't worry. But for now I think everyone would feel safer if they didn't have to worry about an armed stranger walking around where they sleep". It was hard to argue with Rick and Lacy wasn't about to try. She fought the nakedness she suddenly felt without her bow over her shoulder reminding herself she hadn't had it this whole time and seemed to have survived.

"Lastly ..." Rick began

"I want to inform you that I shoot first and ask questions later when it comes to protectin' the people in this group."His eyes grew hard as he spoke.

"Now if you want to stay here that's fine but be warned that if you so much as think of hurtin' a single person in here you will have a bullet between your eyes faster than you can say squirrel stew."

There was a brief pause before Daryl added.

"Speakin' a which, smells like breakfast is ready".

Lacy felt her stomach grumbling at the exciting prospect of eating breakfast. The threat to her life completely glanced off of her now that food had been reintroduced to the conversation. She couldn't decide what she wanted more, food or a shower. Rick searched her eyes for the answer he needed. He needed to know that he was making the right call letting her out of her cell. Lacy saw his eyes boring into hers she didn't look away or flinch. Rick found what he was looking for it seemed and extended a hand to Lacy. She placed her slender cold hand into his warm callused one. He shook her hand firmly saying

"Welcome to the group Lacy, I'm Rick Grimes"

She noticed the men in the cells door way retreating as Rick helped her to stand up. Rick saw in her eyes a fire he had seen was determination and then there were people like Lacy who were survivors. He could use someone like her on his side. He kept waiting for her to say something to do something but she stayed so still and quiet. She was mysterious. He would have to have his people feel her out and report back to him. It was much easier then interrogating the woman. Backing her into a corner would probably stop her from ever opening up at all. She wasn't a criminal she just wasn't one of them… yet.

Rick led her out of her cell into the morning light and commotion of the camp. He looked out over his people as they moved about talking to each other and carrying out various activities like eating breakfast and mending clothing. Lacy saw in them the difference between surviving and living. She had been surviving in the woods. She ate enough food to keep from dying, she kept her heart beat going through the less then restful nights but she hadn't truly been alive in a long time. She saw as these people laughed and smiled. She saw The Asian man from last night kiss a woman with short brown hair. Lacy felt a pang in the base of her heart as she looked away. Lacy knew that she could start a new life here. She knew that from this point on everything could be different but she was terrified. The risk of rejection was almost enough to drive her back into the woods. Rick had his eyes on Lacy. Try as he might he couldn't gauge her personality. He had always had great people skills it was one of things about being a cop that he had always excelled in.

"Let me find you some clean clothes and a towel." Lacy watched Rick descend the stairs and wasn't sure if she should follow him or stay put. Here goes nothing Lacy thought to herself as she mentally prepared herself for what was sure to be the most comfortable of her post Outbreak life.


	4. Sheep In a World of Wolves

Lacy felt like she had shed a skin when she got cleaned up. Her hair was soft and she had brushed all the knots loose. Her scalp was sore from all the tugging and she had lost a lot of volume but her hair actually looked halfway decent. She had been forced to cut the hair tie to get it out sadly. It had been her last one. She couldn't stop deeply inhaling the scent of the soap she had used. It was the best smell in the world; it reminded her of clean sheets. She felt like she was pounds lighter and regaining a bit of herself. She was surprised by the light pinkness that her skin was and the amount of freckles she had forgotten about across her nose. She ran her hands up and down her bar arms remembering the feeling of smooth skin. The clothes that had been loaned to her consisted of a soft cotton t shirt and drawstring cargo pants. She ended up liking the cargo pants far more than her beat up Levis. She felt the fabric brushing against her skin and couldn't keep the smile from her face. She knew that next on the itinerary was breakfast so she hurried and made her way towards the smell of food.

Daryl watched as Lacy hungrily ate her helping of breakfast. She sat not so far from him in the buzzing cafeteria where everyone had congregated to eat. He knew what hunger felt like, they all did. He hadn't been satisfied after a meal in a while but what she displayed was ravenous, animalistic. The desperation in the way she ate made him look away. His appetite was fleeting him as he forced himself to eat the rest of his serving. Lacy felt slightly guilty for wearing these people's clothes and eating their food and using their water when she didn't even know most of their names, but she couldn't stop herself from gulping down her food like a wild dog. She ignored her desire to lick the bowl clean but with great effort. She looked up and saw eyes darting away from her in every direction. She hadn't realized she was being watched, she had been caught up in the taste and warmth of the food she was eating.

A small woman with short gray hair sat down next to Lacy as she set her now empty bowl on the table.

"You're Lacy aren't you?" The gentleness in the speaking woman's posture was comforting to Lacy. She had the disposition of a mother. It was written all over her face along with the fact that no matter where she was or who she was with she would be a mother to anyone who needed it.

"I am" She pulled her lips into a tight obligatory smile. To Carol it looked more like a grimace.

"My name is Carol, I hear you're going to be staying with us a while". This was the first Lacy had heard of her being able to stay outside of talking to Rick. As for the people, the ones that had to ether accept her or banish her, no one had told her to leave yet but no one had asked her about staying ether. It was one topic that she had pussy footed around, to afraid of the answer to ask any of them. This was also her first calm weapon free introduction. The instinct to shake Carols hand came back to Lacy quickly and surprisingly. It felt natural and gave lacy reassurance that there was a human somewhere inside her.

"If you will have me, I don't have anywhere else to be" Lacy replied in a way that let her say how badly she wanted to stay without using those exact words. Carols eyes smiled when she spoke to Lacey.

"I have a feeling you're going to be really good for us. I wanted to welcome you to the group and don't let them worry you, everyone will warm up to you soon enough".

Lacy felt a wave of emotion that she couldn't identify. She had forgotten how the right words can be so beautiful and touching. She fought down the urge to cry, no longer numb to the conversations she had, suburban life once made her feel as though conversation could be had with only half a mind. Not anymore. Now she felt in full force the importance and meaning of every word used. Lacy knew that Carol wouldn't have come to her if she hadn't meant what she said. It reminded her why she had loved English so much in school. Carol laid a dainty hand on Lacy's shoulder before standing up and slowly making her way back to the cell block.

Carol Smiled to herself, she loved the feeling of saying exactly what someone needed to hear. She told Lacy what she knew really needed to be said and hoped that was enough to heal some part of that broken girl and keep her there. Daryl moved to stand by the wall still across from Lacy in the cafeteria. She didn't seem to know what to do with herself. Rick had only told her about breakfast and a shower when he spoke to her this morning. With those two things done she had no task. Lacy was confused by the notion of not having to do something. She had been constantly occupied in the woods. She wasn't sure what to do with time when it was just handed to her to use at her own disposal. Daryl had seen her face when she talked to Carol. It wasn't surprising to see Carol get through someone's walls. Carol had a way with her that made her capable of by passing a person's defenses and reaching them where they live. Daryl didn't even need to hear the conversation he already knew what had happened. Lacy was certainly going to be more guarded with everyone else. Daryl tried to commit Lacy's face to memory not the face she put on for show but what he had seen Carol bring out. That was the Lacy Rick is waiting to meet, the one he wanted them to report back about.

Lacy stood up hitting her hands on her pants and looking around her. She felt the need to be useful somehow. What should she do? She thought to herself. Just ask someone if they want help? Glenn had been watching Lacy too. He walked up to her now. He had been waiting for Carol to leave working up the nerve to come talk to Lacy. She didn't smile when he stood in front of her. She just waited to find out what he needed. Glenn cleared his throat and said

"Look I'm sorry I scared you last night, er.. this morning I mean. I just really care about everyone here and I'm tired of losing people all the time. I hope you understand that it's nothing personal". Lacy nodded in agreement though there hadn't really been a great many people Lacy lost. For the most part what haunted her were the things she had seen.

"I understand "She said anyway. Regardless of their different viewpoints she accepted his apology and wanted nothing more than to end the awkward conversation she was in.

"I just didn't want to leave a bad impression if you'll be staying for a while" Glenn said. Lacy felt antsy and itched at her neck nervously. Glenn was calmer now as he let out a sigh. He must have felt the weight of that more than Lacy expected. He still worried what people thought of him she realized. She reflected for a moment and realized she still did too. Most the eyes that Lacy met were cautious ones. They weren't unwelcoming by any means but they were hesitant and guarded.

She felt herself wanting to know what each one of them had been through. She wanted to know their stories. Lacy saw a few children run past out the cafeteria door giggling. She recognized the way a child's laugh chimes musically. It had so much innocence in a world black with sin. Lacy couldn't stop herself before the thought went through her mind, would they live to be adults? She didn't entertain the thought for fear of losing the breakfast she so feverishly ate a moment ago.

Lacy decided to go in search of Rick. He would most likely be the person who decided what she was going to do today. Lacy exited the room after a quickly retreating Daryl whom she hadn't noticed was there to start with. Lacy cherished not having to make any decisions for the time being. It was easy sailing. She wasn't sure where to find Rick so she began asking around while introducing herself to people which proved to be an exhausting task. Most of the people she talked to ether didn't know the answer or suggested that she go ask so and so where to find him; As she rounded the last corner looking for Daryl, the last person she had been directed towards she saw Rick leaning over a table in a room that looked sort of like a library. Lacy approached Rick, Daryl and Tyrees realizing too late that she probably shouldn't be over hearing the conversation they were having. They were all leaning over a map pointing and talking vigorously but in hushed tones.

"We are weak on this whole side of the prison!" Daryl jabbed a dirty finger at the map.

"But we should fortify the side closest to the road first; if anyone is coming they are going to come in a car".

"Bull shit!" Daryl said a little louder before continuing.

"Why waist the gas and bust down the door when ya can sneak in the back door that is fuckin' unlocked for Christ sake"

"Tryrees?" Rick asked clearly wanting more view points.

"I dunno guys" Tyreese said timidly looking at Rick before continuing.

"I mean if I were gonna go break in someplace I wouldn't want to let them know I was coming with some loud ass car. Might as well call them first to tell them I was coming"

Rick let his head hang with both his hands gripping the table's edge and his elbows locked. He had heard enough to take a step back and go about things their way.

"Alright why don't we just start on your side and go round fortifying the fences as best we can" Daryl seemed to have won over Rick on some tactile discussion a glimmer of pride in his eyes. This was clearly an important meeting that she had no place observing. Lacy wanted to turn around and walk out but before she had the chance Daryl nodded towards the door and said.

"Heads up fellas, we aint alone no more". Rick, whose back had been to her this whole time turned to see who had walked in. Lacy met his questioning gaze she was an entirely separate issue Rick had to solve that day. Rick shifted his weight under his mental burden and said with as much a smile as he could muster in that moment.

"Well hi there, you sure clean up well". Lacy blushed a touch embarrassed to be interrupting something that seemed so far above her and then to be complimented rather than reprimanded.

"I was just… I mean I didn't know… I need a job boss." Lacy said stammering a little out of nervousness. The weakness behind it instantly brought Lacy's blood pressure up. She was being such a fool. You can't be a sheep in a world of wolves. Rick was a bit surprised that she had come to him. He hadn't expected her to be looking for a task this early. He thought he would find her milling about or more likely sleeping as soon as this meeting was over and deal with her then. Rick liked her initiative.

"If you're feelin' up to it we need someone to take out some of the walkers down by the fences. You won't be alone and you'll be on the right side of the fence this time, what do you say?"

"Yeah I can do that." Lacy agreed before actually knowing what this task entailed. She hoped it wouldn't include guns, she really hated guns.

"I'll go with her. You guys can finish up here without me". Tyrees offered. Rick pinched the bridge of his nose with his fore finger and thumb.

"Yeah, alright, we can do that" Rick said meeting Daryl's eyes again. Lacy was beginning to get the feeling Daryl was a type of right hand man to Rick. It seemed the needn't speak to communicate. Tyrees started towards her touching fists with Daryl lightly while passing him.

"Come on". He said to Lacy. With a motion of his hand in the direction they were heading

"We are gonna go stir us some zombie brains".

Down at the fence Lacy realized how important the fences really where. There were probably a dozen flesh sacks pushing against the fence in just this one spot. That's where Tyrees began using a knife attached to a stick essentially spearing these things before moving slowly down the fence. Lacy picked up her own makeshift spear and began methodically Jabbing feeling decently in control with the fence between her and certain death. She let her body take over and her mind die down for nearly 2 hour before she realized that they had made their way down one long side of the prison. It had put her at ease not having to worry about anything except smothering this threat that was right in front of her. They stood together looking back at the heaps of lifeless bodies. Both of them were sweating and breathing heavily. Lacy was momentarily light headed when she stood straight and tall again. She had pushed herself but she didn't care

"Damn, I think we have earned ourselves a little break. I haven't had such a good partner in a while. Lets head back and see what's going on". Tyreese smiled at Lacy with approval in his eyes. Lacy leaned her spear against the fence next to the others and began the walk across the field. She could see and feel the sun beating down on her neck and there was someone watching them from the guard tower but she couldn't make out much of their face due to the glare. Lacy thought it might be the brunette she saw with Glenn that morning but she couldn't be sure.

Inside Lacy was introduced to some more people. She met a mousy blond girl named Beth and at the same time met Judith a baby of only 8 or so months. Beth was a very pretty girl. She had pointed a nose and big blue eyes, she was fair and the dirt that was brushed across her cheek made her look like a real life Cinderella. Lacy wonder how life had been for Beth before this all happened. She must have been the object of every mans eye. She seemed sweet and nice too which would only have made her more desirable. The baby was a tiny peanut and didn't make much noise. She didn't look like Beth but Lacy didn't ask knowing it would most definitely be a touchy subject. Lacy then spoke to the gray haired man she had seen already, whose name turned out to be Hershel. He was something like the group's doctor from what Lacy gathered. He checked Lacy's vital signs and told her that she needed to be drinking more water. Lacy didn't hesitate in taking the bottle he offered her and lovingly sipping the cold fresh tasting water. She didn't tell him about her mornings activities knowing he probably wouldn't approve. Lacy spotted Carol hanging some clothes on a line and went to her side.

"Ah, would you like some help?" Lacy asked hating how sheepish her voice sounded yet again. Carol had urgency about her as she picked up and shook out each item before pinning it up. Lacy liked how no job was looked down on here. Everything was equally important.

"I can't say no to a little help." Carol said with a smile. Lacy picked up some clothes trying to repeat exactly what she saw Carol do. Carol glanced over approvingly she hadn't had to give Lacy any instructions. Lacy chewed on her dry lower lip and picked up something else, pants this time.

"So what did you do before this?" Carol asked wanting to know what kind of life Lacy had lived.

"I was ah, I was in school actually". Lacy thought about the class work that still waited unfinished for her back across a few states where she once lived.

"School?" Carol asked interest slowing down her practiced hands. She wondered if Lacy was younger then she realized.

"Yeah it's sort of useless now but I was an English student".

"Useless? The power of language is never to be underestimated sweetie. It's probably why Daryl hangs around you so much". Carol said looking down her nose at her and quickly gesturing with her eyes and smirking. Lacy shrugged her shoulders deciding not to look just yet. She didn't think Daryl had been hanging around much and she certainly hadn't said much to him. You are bound to bump into people when you live in close quarters with them. Carol and Lacy had reached the bottom of the bin serving as a laundry basket.

"Well I better go get started on dinner" Carol said balancing the bin on her hip.

Lacy was still thinking about what Carol had said when she felt eyes on her neck again. She turned around and saw Daryl sitting on the second floor railing. He had one foot hanging over the side and the other was resting on top the bar. He quickly found something else to watch as soon as she looked back. Daryl didn't know what possessed him to watch her. He told himself he was only doing what Rick asked. He was getting a feel for her; he was keeping track of her. He found himself keeping tabs on her as if he was trying to solve a crime. Which admittedly was kind of overkill. It wasn't for personal gain he told himself again.

Lacy had turned back around towards Carol finally allowing him the freedom to look at her. He saw how Lacy's auburn hair shone red in the suns beams. She looked like an entirely different person than when he had found her yesterday. She still had the bags under her eyes and she looked too thin to be healthy but she was undeniably fortunate genetically. There had to be more important things that needed to be done he realized. Lacy was talking to Carl and some of the younger girls that had come over from Woodbury. Woodbury. The Governor flashed trough Daryl's mind and rage began to build. Hate was a feeling Daryl had no trouble identifying and hate was what Daryl felt towards the Governor. He looked down trying to spot Lacy again to distract himself before he had made the conscious decision to do so.

"Looking for somebody?" Beth's angelic voice chimed.

" Nah just keepin' track a all yall since apparently yall need it". Daryl said quickly. He took one more quick sweep of the room still not seeing Lacy.

"Well it sure looks like you're looking for someone" Beth started

"I know someone whose looking for you" A small soft blanket was wrapped around Judith and Beth held her out to Daryl. He took her happily making sure not to let too much show on his face as he began

"Hey there little ass kicker ya miss uncle Daryl?" The Infant gurgled and giggled in his arms. Daryl wasn't good at showing that he cared He couldn't figure out the logistics of it all but with Judith it was easy. He knew what she wanted, he made her feel safe when he held her and rocked her; and in return Daryl got to feel close to someone. This was the reason he spent so much time with her. She was a beautiful little girl. Her bright eyes hadn't been turned dark and cold like all of theirs.

Beth smiled at them letting her arms hang loose for a while. She seemed to have become like a mother to this child just because she was there when they needed someone. She didn't have any particularly ties to Judith; she was never very close to Laurie if anything she did it for Rick. She brought Judith to visit Daryl in hopes that he could get her to fall asleep. She needed to get her to take a nap soon but Judith was showing no signs of cooperating. Daryl used a gentleness he rarely exercised as he lightly bounced her in the crook of his elbow.

"So Lacy seems nice". Beth offered

"Grateful too" She added after thinking a moment. Daryl just nodded.

"I think I am already beginning to trust her". Beth tried for the third time to start a conversation about Lacy.

"Yeah well I wouldn't dive in 'fore ya know how deep the pond is" Daryl said.

Beth had seen Daryl watching Lacy all day. She had seen Daryl lurking in the background the entire time she had been talking to Lacy earlier. Beth was confident she knew more about Daryl then he knew about himself at the moment. He was warming up to her quicker than he liked and he couldn't deal with it. Beth didn't say anything but she noticed his eyes sweep the room again, looking for Lacy no doubt. Beth was excited to see how Lacy would affect this group, what she would bring to the table and so far the biggest change was Daryl. He was the only one behaving differently. Daryl felt how warm Judith made his arms and chest. Her breathing was slowly turning into an even purr. She always fell asleep when he held her. He wished she didn't, he missed looking into her eyes while she slept. Beth thought it odd how someone so dark and angry had such a soft spot for a baby girl. If he had had a daughter he would have been wrapped around her finger.

Beth thought optimistically that Judith was lucky, she would grow up with more than one fatherly figure. It was true it takes a village to raise a child and everyone here loved Judith more than they loved themselves. Beth, being the main care taker, watched everyone that held Judith. It was almost like therapy for all of them. She let Daryl hold Judith for a few more minutes in silence before she offered her arms to take Judith back noticing now that she had fallen asleep. Beth smiled with relief trying not to wake her in the transition. Daryl stood tall and squared his shoulders trying to regain some of the manliness he usually projected. Beth thanked him with a knowing smile that made Daryl a little uneasy. Then she carried Judith off to lay her down. He hadn't realized he was being used to put the baby to sleep until now.

Rick whistled to Daryl and motioned for him to come down. Daryl could distinctly hear the sound of a car outside the prison. They had been running low on supplies for Judith She was quickly outgrowing what little clothing they had for her. It must be time to go out on a run but then Daryl saw something in Ricks eyes that told him something was wrong. Rick didn't want to frighten anyone but there was urgency in him that Daryl couldn't mistake. He quickly leapt over the railing bending his knees to absorb the shock when landing on the ground. He quickly but calmly approached Rick. As soon as he stood outside he knew exactly what was wrong.


	5. Fire and Ice

The commotion outside couldn't keep up with the adrenaline in their systems as the people of the prison responded to the threat before them. A section of the fence was down and the hungry soulless creatures responsible for the breech were ambling quickly towards the meal they so desired. Unbeknownst to the vulnerable people inside the prison walls Daryl Rick and some others were scrambling to take down all the geeks before them and restore the trampled fence before things escalated anymore. Daryl had his cross bow out taking steadying breaths he moved forward shooting multiple zombies down in a matter of a minute. He pulled an arrow out of an already immobilized corpse and stabbed another walker directly in the ear with it killing it instantly and watching it drop to the ground in a heap. Another had a hand on Daryl's shirt as he stabbed it with his hunting knife. He plunged the sharp knife directly under the jaw through the rotting flesh of the top of its head. Daryl felt a path of bodies forming behind him as he took down each one he saw. Rick worked his way through the heard alongside Daryl. Both of them wasted no efforts taking each threat down in one smooth motion, essentially hitting the off switch and moving on.

Before long the heard had been cleared and the mass of people outside the prison took up the task of restoring the fence. There was only so much time before more walkers surrounded them. The ruckus they had been making including multiple people using high powered guns was sure to attract every one of these things that heard the bullets echo off the walls and trees beside them. Unsteady feet stepped on discarded corpses as they grabbed wooden pieces to prop up the chain link. They were lucky they had been preparing to fortify the fences already. If they hadn't the group couldn't have fixed the fence in a timely enough fashion and every life there would have been at risk. Daryl cursed himself for not pushing to start the project earlier. He had been distracted by his task of keeping an eye on Lacy and he blamed himself harshly. They pushed stakes into the dirt at an angle forcing the top of the fence back up. Daryl only now noticed a sweaty and exhausted Lacy using all her strength to help Tyrees place another stake down. She helped him guide the top of the thick heavy wooden piece into position since its size made it awkward to carry alone. Had she been out here before him Daryl wondered?

Carl looked much older than he was as he pulled aside corpses trying to clear a way for more of the fence to be repaired. Carl was always in the middle of things somehow despite all of Rick's effort to keep Carl a child for as long as possible. Carl was a survivor. All he knew was staying alive and fighting to protect his loved ones. He was so young but Daryl knew that much of Carl's life before the outbreak had been long forgotten.

"What the hell happened out here?" Daryl finally got a chance to ask Rick.

"There was too many of them pushin' on this section they toppled the thing". Rick was out of breath. His chest heaved up and down as he sputtered out his response to Daryl's question.

"I thought we sent people down here this mornin' ta clear these ass holes out". Daryl was trying to understand how this threat had gotten the jump on them. Lacy responded this time making Daryl turn to her

"We were down here for 2 hours earlier. There weren't any left when we went inside. I'm sorry" She looked down at the corpse at her feet disbelief on her face.

"Well obviously ya missed some" Daryl snarled.

"Nah, man she's right" Tyrees offered now in Lacy's defense. She shot him a grateful look.

"We cleared this area they must have wandered over her e since then"

"We don't need to blame anyone"Rick took head of this conversation now before Daryl had a chance to respond.

"The important thing is that we are all okay. Daryl looks like we need to get right on this fence project. Gather up everyone that's available and let's get some of this area right here reinforced so that we can sleep a little better tonight" Daryl hardly had a chance to nod his consent before Rick was off talking to Carl in a hushed voice. Daryl looked around him now at the people still outside. Maggie had been on guard with Sasha. They stood 25 feet away by the foot of a car they had prepared to take out before the fence situation unfolded. Daryl walked up to them leaving Lacy and Tyrees without as much as a glance.

"Hey, how are ya guys?" He asked them, concern barley masked by his tone.

"Were alright" Maggie answered

"We saw the fence giving and got down here as quick as we could. I thought we were going to get crushed under it. They don't look it but those monsters are strong." She let out a long breath

"Do ya need ta rest?" Daryl asked in preparation for his next question.

"No, what do you need us to do." Sasha said right away. She wasn't going to go rest and let them handle the situation from there. She would see it through to the end. Daryl gave her an appreciative nod and sent her and Maggie to gather people while he planned what he was going to have everyone do once they were gathered. He climbed in the car taking it back to the others since they clearly weren't going anywhere tonight.

With the most able bodied residents gathered Daryl began giving out jobs. He had a few people collecting more debris from the prison to use and set others to work burning the zombie corpses out in one of the fields. Everyone worked quickly and before long they had a decent section of the fence restored. The bright red sun was low on the horizon and they were losing light quickly. Lacy quietly approached Daryl. She had been on burning duty; the bright fire fueled by gasoline and discarded pieces of creatures no longer human was dying down now. She felt a pang of guilt trying not to think about the families and lives these creatures once held dear. She carried another guilt as well, Daryl accusation from earlier still sat in the back of her mind. He had heard her approaching and turned expectantly towards the approaching footsteps. He had been waiting for Rick so when his eyes landed on Lacy he couldn't contain his scoff.

"What do ya need?" He asked with his back to her again. He didn't want to look at her. He kicked himself again for getting distracted by some new comer and risking the lives of the people he had promised to protect. He told himself again that he had only been trying to protect everyone by watching her but a part of him knew he had been enjoying it and letting down his guard. From now on it was all business he decided then and there.

"Rick wanted me to tell you something." Lacy wanted Daryl to understand that she wasn't trying to get in the way. She prefaced her statement with Rick's approval hoping that would smooth the way for her to give him what felt like orders. She wished Rick hadn't asked her to pass along the message she didn't feel like she was in a position to give it. Not to someone like Daryl.

"Well out with it then" Daryl spit on the ground impatiens plastered on the side of his face that Lacy could see. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the forming of words rather than looking at Daryl's broad shoulders visible due to his sleeveless t-shirt.

"You and I are on first watch" She had thought about posing it like a question 'Would you go on first watch with me?' But decided against it in the event he would choose to say no.

"Well aint that a treat" Daryl's sarcasm hit Lacy hard. She couldn't contain herself anymore.

"Fuck you." She said flatly. Daryl turned to her eyebrows raised in surprise as much as disbelief.

"I have busted my ass all day for you people. I get it you saved my life but I don't owe you anything. I didn't ask you to take me in. You offered. I don't need your snide comments and blame okay? So just stuff all your bullshit up your ass and get off my back." Lacy felt a weight lift from her shoulders but it was instantly replaced by another. As much as she needed to get that off her chest she didn't actually want to leave. The truth was quite the opposite; Lacy was thrilled to be a part of this group. Leaving would mean death for certain.

"Do ya think yer special er somethin'?" Daryl's voice slowly grew louder as he towered over her. Though he was only 3 or so inches taller than her the gap seemed much bigger as his voice grew angry. His chest was only inches from hers but Lacy held her ground and set her jaw. She looked him in the eyes as he continued.

"Everyone a' us has been bustin' our asses out here. In case you forgot there are children in this prison who look to us to keep em safe. If ya have a problem with how I handle things ya can take yer useless ass back into the woods where I found ya and kindly go fuck yourself"

"Is that so?" Lacy asked Cooley, The rage from before was replaced now with an avalanche.

"Daryl I don't know what your problem is with me but you damn well know you can't kick me out" Lacy actually wasn't sure if that was true. She banked her statement on the idea that Rick probably made all final decisions or was at least part of them. The avalanche continued as more and more hurtful words came to Lacy's mind.

"I'm here to help, that's all I've tried to do since I got here what did I ever do to you huh? Or do you just treat everyone like dirt?" Lacy's heart pounded in her ears. The angry part of her had been building and building for what felt like years. It started far before she met these people and part of her knew it wasn't his fault but she unleashed it on him regardless. She had had it with the guilt he had made her feel. She wanted to push everything right back on to him and make him feel what she was feeling.

"Ya don't know a thing about me Red" Daryl interrupted with narrowed eyes.

"Oh yeah" Lacy didn't hesitate in taking the offensive while ignoring the strange nickname Daryl had taken to calling her.

"Here is what I know. I know that you're a redneck ass hole who thinks he can throw his weight around and be rude to people because he's finally got some sort of power now that they population has been decimated. That of course isn't enough for you because you have some kind of inferiority complex. Oh daddy never loved you or some bull shit like that I'm sure. News flash this is the fucking apocalypse. Get your shit together and stop unloading it on other people before there aren't any people left to shit all over. You aren't the only person with a lot to deal with. "Lacy saw something in Daryl's eyes that took away her conviction. When she made the comment about Daryl's father his face had changed. He had flinched. She had taken a blind jab in the dark and she had hit home. Regret flooded through her. Why had she said all those things? She knew the answer though. She knew it would hurt him. Lashing out wasn't like her but then again she didn't know herself all that well these days. Daryl spit directly on Lacy's no longer clean t-shirt.

"Fucking cunt" He said as he turned and stomped into the prison. The sound of the heavy door slamming made Lacy jump. Maggie quickly walked over to Lacy who hadn't moved yet.

"What the hell did he just say?"

"Nothing." Lacy lied.

"That right there did not look like nothing. It looked like Daryl was going to rip you a new one. Did I hear him correctly as he left? If he called you what I think he called you I'm about to go after him and teach him a thing or two about respecting women." Lacy relaxed slightly. Maggie thought that Daryl had been the one attacking her. Lacy knew that she had instigated that fight but she didn't correct Maggie. Maggie looked ready to roll her sleeves up and run after Daryl but Lacy stopped her.

"It really wasn't anything, we were just talking." Maggie didn't look convinced but she backed down realizing Lacy didn't want her involvement. Lacy looked up at the tower. She walked away from Maggie when she decided to go up there now rather than figure out this stupid guard situation. Since telling Daryl hadn't gone all that well and it was her own fault she would be alone, she reasoned she was responsible for both their jobs of watching. Maybe Daryl would send someone maybe he wouldn't. Either way she would have to be diligent to make up for her own stupidity. She climbed the stairs at a hurried jog reaching the top that was fenced in with more chain linking. The view was somehow calming. She could see a large portion of the prison side from there and out into the large field where many of the residents spent free time. A breeze picked up a piece of her hair and tossed it around. Lacy couldn't hold back a small smile. She had been prone to climbing trees for a better view in her days in the woods. It was an escape and it was a place to sleep. She had grown to like the perspective it provided her with.

Lacy was alone again. She enjoyed the soft hum of voices far below her allowing her to really reflect on all the things that had happened to her in the last day or so. So much of her life had done a complete 180. She thought about the food here. Was it gourmet? No but it was infinitely better than what she had been eating in the woods. When she had set out to travel her only goal was to be away from Chicago. Once she was far enough away she would figure out the rest of the plan. It ended up that she never made a plan. She was not only lost but aimless. She had no hopes or anything. She had contemplated suicide so many times. Lacy shook the thought from her head. The knot in her stomach was making it hard to swallow as it took control of her entirely. The people here were good people. She had run into some evil men along her way. You could see it in their soulless eyes before they even had a chance to talk. Daryl wasn't evil. He was angry, he was guarded but he wasn't evil. Lacy thought for another moment about how he had risked his own life to carry her into the prison. Why did he have to poke at her with his sarcasm and bullshit she wondered? She didn't want to be mad at him and she was beginning to realize she had no right to be.

"Stupid" she said aloud to herself. She shouldn't have responded to Daryl's remarks. She didn't care what the consequences would be in that moment. Now though, she realized fully her mistake. If it wasn't just that she had started trouble in a group she had only just joined then it was the fact that the person she caused trouble with may very well be second in command and a good man.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Lacy kicked at the railing that was keeping her in the top of the tower. Spinning on her heels and throwing her weight into it she held her temples tightly. She was so angry with herself. She wasn't some stupid teenage girl she was a fucking adult and she needed to learn self control before Rick and the others decide to kick her ungrateful ass out of this camp. In the dark top of the stairwell Lacy saw movement her hands quickly fluttering around her in search of a weapon she didn't have. Daryl had stood and watched her for a few moments as she kicked the railing and talked to herself. Lacy realized now she should have reminded Rick she wasn't armed when he put her on watch. A hand pushed open the door and a tall figure appeared in the dimming light. Lacy's voice caught in her throat as Daryl appeared with her bow in hand. He said nothing as he closed the door behind him and leaned against it. Dirt was streaked across his skin and he had put on a denim vest over his t-shirt. Daryl thought for a moment about how to fix this situation so that they could be on their best guard. Lacy couldn't come up with something to say quick enough , She wanted to apologize, she wanted to tell him about the evil men she had met and to tell him that he was a frustrating ass hole but before she had put together any kind of sentence Daryl cut in

"Look, 'fore ya go n' grovel n' shit I know yer sorry. You wanna know why I know yer sorry? Cuz I saw ya talkin' ta Carol this mornin'. You may be a bitch but ya aint wrong. I shouldn't a blamed ya fer nothing'. Okay?" It wasn't't exactly an apology and he had just assumed she was sorry which rubbed Lacy the wrong way but she was relieved. She WAS sorry even if she had wanted to be the one to say it rather than Daryl. She was even more pleased that he had admitted to having done anything wrong.

"Did Maggie talk to you?" Lacy asked passively assuming she had been the one to coax this apology out of him. Daryl looked uncomfortable for a moment when he answered.

"Nah, why?"

"She came and asked me what had happened. She was outside with us and saw our little disagreement. She came and expressed concern to me" Lacy wasn't sure what else to call the conversation her and Daryl had. Disagreement seemed to fit alright. Every time she looked at his face she recalled his eyes when she had made the comment about his father. She thought again about how sorry she was but decided to let it be brushed under the rug.

"What did ya say?" Daryl's face was unreadable as he waited for Lacy's response his lower arm swinging loosely as he gestured with his hand that didn't hold her bow.

"I just told her it was nothing, we were only talking." Lacy shrugged her shoulders. It hadn't seemed like anyone else's business. Daryl's shoulders relaxed significantly. He hated all the bull shit games of telephone that gossipy people started. He was momentarily thrilled that Lacy wasn't a gossip.

"I'm not sure if I lied to her or not." Lacy said in the silence considering the idea of deception in a day and age like today.

"Nah, ya didn't 'lie." Daryl's voice was softer now. He looked out at the view the sky was almost completely dark now. The Georgia stars shone beautifully over the woods. Daryl put out the hand holding the bow.

"Rick said ta give this back ta ya. If yer on watch its yers to use. Rest a the time we're gonna hold on to it, least 'fore now" Lacy hesitate before grabbing the bow. The smooth cold metal beneath her hands felt better than a hundred showers. Daryl watched Lacy's face closely as he returned her bow. She was like him he realized. His cross bow might as well be another of his limbs. She quickly hung it over her shoulder as Daryl pulled her quiver of arrows over his head.

"Thank you" Lacy stated simply.

"Welcome" Daryl put a hand on the chain link and looked out over the prison. He reminded Lacy of a bird of prey like a Hawk, Maybe it was just the feathers on the ends of his arrows. Whatever he was he was at the top of the food chain. They watched over everyone for a long while. The air grew more brisk and everyone seemed to wander back inside the walls of the prison. All that was left to look at were the biters slowly wandering the edge of the forest. Some approaching the fences others were continuing on. Lacy considered the system this group used for watches. It was a pretty damn good one. It was in 4 to 6 hour shifts. 2 people where on each shift to prevent anyone from falling asleep and to make sure that if a situation called for it there would be one person to stand their ground and another to fetch help. Lacy couldn't have come up with a better way to protect these people, short of a military base that is. Lacy nibbled on her lip wanting badly to ask Daryl questions but was afraid of annoying him.

"Ya alright?" His gruff voice came from the ground across from her.

"Yeah, just thinking" Lacy answered passively.

"'bout what?" Daryl asked. It was mostly boredom that had driven him to ask. Lacy was relieved though by the opportunity it presented.

"What state is this?" She waited eagerly for his answer

"Ya've gotta be kiddin' me." Daryl said with what sounded like humor in his voice.

"Ya mean ta tell me that little Miss Sacajawea doesn't even know what state she's in?"

"I'm impressed you even know who Sacajawea was" Lacy shot back. She heard something like a snicker before he said

"Welcome to Georgia Red" Georgia? Lacy didn't know what she had been expecting but that wasn't it. She was positive she had walked much farther than just 2 or so states down. She thought about all the times she had made camp. She hadn't been keeping track or time which made it harder for her to keep track of distance. She had been so cut off she realized.

"Where ya from?" Daryl asked now, curiosity on his face.

"Chicago. How long has it been since the outbreak?" She asked him now turning the subject away from herself and trying for the first time in a long, long time to get a good feel for the world around her. Daryl leaned forward his forearm balanced on his knee as he thought about the answer to that question. He started talking before he really knew what he was going to say.

"We used ta have a guy with a wind up watch, real good guy. He always kept track a time. Said it was a piece a the world before this he couldn't give up. His name was Dale. When he got bit we sortta stopped keepin' track of it ourselves. Then Judith was born and with the way she's growin' she's sortta our livin' calendar. I think it's been a little more than a year now. "Lacy saw the hurt in Daryl's eyes when he talked about people he had lost. She didn't bring it up she just nodded in understanding. She thought again about her birthday. It had been a month after the outbreak that she had realized she missed it. If it was a little passed a year ago that means that any day now she would miss it again. Silence fell between them as they sat at the top of the guard tower. Lacy shot her head forward alarming Daryl with the motion. She had turned onto the balls of her feet and was watching intently between the diamonds of the fence her fingers laced into the links on ether side of her head.

"What do ya see?" Daryl asked in a hushed voice approaching her in a crouch.

"Look at the fence" She pointed to the section they had just been fixing a few hours earlier. Daryl quickly realized what had gotten Lacy's attention. One of the wooden support beams was sliding under the weight of maybe 10 biters that pushed against the spot. As the first beam slid another started. Daryl took the stairs down 3 or 4 at a time while Lacy used the railings to slide down halfway to the landing where the stairs rotated. She jumped over the middle where the railings overlapped to the next section of stairs going the other direction and running down the last flight. She beat Daryl down by a few seconds.

The door slammed against the brick wall of the tower as it was hastily cast open. Both of them sprinted towards the fence hearing the blood pumping in their ears. As they got there a small piece of the fence was bending inward and the top had started to drop down, two of the beams lie on the ground between them and the fence. Lacy didn't think before she ran full speed and threw all of her body weight into the fence. She felt squishy cold fingers grabbing at her hair and clothes. She was careful to avoid the teeth that was mashing at her through the metal. Her body weight had bent the wave in the fence back slightly but not enough. She walked back a ways before running full speed into it again. This time one of the walkers, a once young woman grabbed a hold of her hair firmly. Lacy let out a small yelp as she furiously tugged at the hair trapped between its dead fingers. Other hands were trying to grab her ankles. She stomped down on a few hands separating them from their owners while pulling her torso as far away from the chain link as she could manage. It felt like the skin on her scalp was going to get ripped off of her skull when all of a sudden it stopped. The force of her own resistance made her stumble away from the fences. She looked up and saw Daryl had stopped moving the beams to free Lacy from the walkers grasps. Having learned nothing she ran and threw herself into the fence again finally getting it to look almost straight though it continued to tilt more and more towards them from the top. Daryl jammed a beam back under the fences top edge.

"Do you have a fucking death wish?" He asked harshly.

"It worked didn't it?" She shot back before grabbing the other beam. It was large and heavy. Both her arms wrapped around it tightly she dragged it as quickly as she could towards the fence. Daryl was using his knife to take out the walkers through the fence. One of the walkers had been crawling up the fence while it was bent lower and was now caught on the barbed wire at the top. Wriggling around it sliced its self apart determined to reach them. Daryl grunted with the effort as he continued to stab through the chain link without looking up. Lacy dropped the beam just as the Biter started to fall down over the fence onto an unsuspecting Daryl. She whipped her bow out her heart soared as she realized t was actually there for her this time. In less than a second she had drawn, loaded and prepared her body to release the arrow. Lacy's feet where set, her breathing was steady and she had an eye on her prey. She was careful not to shoot Daryl but when she released, her arrow whizzed by him so close she thought she saw it brush through his long hair. It embedded itself between the biters eyes and caused it to slump into a very surprised Daryl. He tossed the body off of himself whipping blood from his cheek. What he saw in her eyes hit him hard in the gut. She burned bright. Brighter than her glowing hair under the stars illumination. He felt inside himself something much more like ice. He felt brittle and cold. Taking down threats to him was a way to release some of the hate he stored inside himself. Not for her. He hadn't seen someone look so truly alive in a long while.

"The fuck Red you almost shot me!"

"They key word there is almost. You're alive aren't you? That motherless, disease ridden, bastard isn't." Lacy felt liberated. She was stronger and smarter than he gave her credit for. She held her bow tightly. With her bow there beside her she could face anything and she could certainly handle anything Daryl Dixon threw at her. She and Daryl replaced the last beam digging it further into the ground so it couldn't slip loose again. Just as they were finishing they heard the door to the prison creak and squeal open. It was Carol and Tyrees calmly smiling and chatting as they came to take over the watch for the rest of the night. Their eyes landed on the two sweaty disheveled people in front of them along with the corpse inside the fence and those outside.

"Oooohwee… Looks like you guys had an eventful night." Tyrees said nonchalantly though his face expressed concern.

"Are you guys alright?" Carol asked, her eyes flickering between them.

"Yeah, we are fine. Two of the beams on this fence slipped, we had to take out the threat and restore the fence. Keep your eyes on this area tonight. The two we just fixed should hold but some of these beams aren't far enough into the ground, they might slide." Daryl looked at Lacy as she explained what had happened. She was good with her words. Her slight Midwestern accent wasn't hindering her diction at all. Daryl admitted to himself that he was glad she had answered Carol's question. He wouldn't have known what to say. He wasn't one for small talk which made his answers appear short and flat. They left people cold and kept him distanced from others.

"Good to know. If you guys aren't hurt id suggest you go get some rest. We've got watch from here." Carol's eyes roamed all over them as she said this looking for obvious wounds. Lacy wasn't sure if it was out of self defense or concern for their well being. Lacy turned to Daryl as they began their walk back in. She was waiting for him to ask for her bow back. She knew it was coming and was dreading having to give it up again. Daryl was lost in his own thought barley aware she was still beside him. He knew he needed to talk to Rick now; He needed to bring him up to date not only on the fences and events of the night but on Lacy. Daryl had seen all he needed to make up his mind. That arrow she had shot tonight was vivid in his mind as he prepared himself to report to Rick.

"Aren't you going to ask for my bow back?" A voice that seemed very distant brought Daryl back. He had forgotten about taking her weapons away.

"If ya shoot anyone who's still breathin' tonight I'll hang ya fer walker bait outside a the prison ya got it?" Daryl whipped a dirty rough hand over his face pulling at his jaw and sighing. Lacy's joy was hard to contain as she nodded firmly and walked back to her cell. Daryl's eyes were on her strong back as she disappeared around a corner. It was time to talk to Rick he reminded himself before heading for Ricks cell.


	6. Raspberries

Rick sat by the light of a candle gentle cradling a deeply sleeping Judith. His eyes were far away though he was still very much aware of his surroundings. Rick had many instances where he questioned his own sanity. The other knew about it but they all had collectively decided to ride out the waves and let Rick be. Daryl made more noise walking then he normally would to alert Rick of his approach rather than risk startling him. They exchanged a nod as Daryl leaned against the cell doorway rubbing a hand over his chin roughly. Daryl had made it his personal mission to take as much of the weight off of ricks shoulders as he could starting back when Dale had been bit on Hershel's farm.

"How was watch?" Rick asked expectantly. His voice was much softer than Daryl had anticipated.

"Eventful" Daryl couldn't help but answer bluntly. He had told Rick he would report back after watch but Daryl had originally intended to sleep first.

"Everyone alright?" Ricks face held some concern though he already knew by Daryl's lain back demeanor that there was no immediate danger.

"Yeah, we got Red ta thank fer that" The words hung in the air for a few moments. Rick mulled the statement over before saying with a cocked eyebrow.

"So I take it you like her now?"

"She's a stubborn ass who needs ta learn ta keep her smart mouth shut…. but she's a good fucking shot. She never misses. The way she handled tonight. She risked her life for the group she… saved my life". Rick watched Daryl's face as he remembered the night he had.

"Stubborn? She sounds like somebody else we know huh?" Rick mocked Daryl before continuing.

"What happened out there? You still haven't told me". Daryl ignored Ricks comment about stubbornness. There had been many times before now that they had butted heads. Rick more than anyone knew how stubborn Daryl was.

"A part of the fence that we fixed earlier caved in again". Daryl sighed and crossed his arms before telling the shortest story he could.

"We had ta put 2 a the beams back up but the fence was gettin' folded down. Lacy ran and threw her body weight inta the fence ta bend it back. She nearly got herself eaten. Then after we'd gotten one a the beams back up I was taking out some of the geeks. One a the fuckers was stuck in the barbed wire at the top and fell on me. She shot a half a inch away from my head from 25 yards back and hit the bastard right between the eyes, saved my life. Fuckin' incredible. I dunno I just thought she'd run away. She's been alone for so long I didn't know how she would be in a life er death situation". There was a small smile on Ricks face as he listened to Daryl's opinion of Lacy. Daryl had imagined Lacy to be a bunny rabbit scurrying about in the woods. He had been wrong about that. She was no coward.

"Beth and Carol have both approached me to give me their okay on Lacy today" Rick watched Daryl knowingly.

"I guess I am too then." Daryl said this with a resigned warmness he wasn't comfortable with. Rick nodded before asking.

"Is she a good person, not just a good fighter but a good person?" Daryl remembered the spite and fire when she called him a redneck ass earlier. His ears were hot with irritation for a moment. She had been cruel in that instant but it was his problem and he wasn't about to blubber to Rick that she had hurt his feelings. Then he remembered her face when she had talked to Carol. He remembered how Lacy had the presence of life they all needed to regain. She had such a strong spirit.

"She's a piece a work" Daryl said with a heavy breath.

"She pisses me off but I just can't say anythin' bad 'bout her." That was as apt a description as Daryl had. Rick audibly chuckled this time. Any time a laugh came from Rick so much was left unsaid with it. Ricks rare laughs were highly valued around the Prison and Daryl was proud he had gotten a chuckle even if he hadn't done it intentionally.

"I have a request Daryl" Rick shifted Judith to his other arm as he stood up to look Daryl in the eyes.

"Anythin'" Daryl answered faithfully.

"Take her under your wing" Daryl's eyes darkened. He hadn't expected Rick to ask him to do something like that. Daryl much preferred to work alone, as often as possible.

"Why me?" Daryl asked harshly looking directly into Ricks tired eyes.

"She is a survivor, there is no doubt she can keep herself alive. She just needs to be guided. You have come a long way since I met you Daryl and there is a long way she is going to need to go. You can help her". Daryl sighed and waved Rick off with the back of his hand.

"I'll take her huntin' later today" That was enough of an answer for Rick to understand Daryl would do his best. Rick clapped a hand on Daryl's shoulder and leaned to touch foreheads with him. They had grown to be like brothers these past few months. Rick truly trusted Daryl and trust was so hard to come by these days.

Daryl paced his cell. Now that he was away from Rick he could let down his calm facade. He had been happy or maybe just interested when Rick had asked him to help Lacy and that had scared him. Daryl didn't know how to deal with the knowledge that she was already under his skin. He took a swing at the cement wall before pacing around some more. Daryl itched at the hair on his chin before taking a deep breath and pushing her from his mind completely. There wasn't a problem if he didn't think about it. There was nothing to think about he repeated over and over again. Nothing at all. He laid down on his cot to try and get at least a few hours of sleep though he knew that sleep and rest were not the same.

A soft hand woke Daryl from his dreams. He shot out of bed his chest heaving. He was on his feet arms up and ready in merely seconds. Carol smiled stepping towards Daryl completely unthreatened by Daryl's defensive actions.

"You overslept, I saved you some breakfast" Carol gestured to the bowl of food she had left on his small bedside table. Daryl rubbed the sleep from his eyes and slowly sat on the edge of his cot regaining control of the situation and the shake in his hands. Carol hadn't moved yet, she just looked at Daryl with a small smile.

"Thanks old lady." Daryl teased Carol gently. She let out her charming little chuckle.

"You're welcome Rambo, thanks for not killing me." Daryl rubbed the back of his neck letting his head hang loose to stretch his tight neck muscles. He kneaded the protruding muscles with his fingers hoping to relieve some of his chronic neck pain.

"Yeah, sorry 'bout that. Ya startled me". Carol nodded but she knew he was keeping something from her. She had known for some time now that he had nightmares about his brother. She had seen it in him since the day he had comeback. He hadn't said much about Merle. He didn't need to. They all knew that he had died trying to end the war they had found themselves in. She knew Daryl had found and killed his brother after Merle had turned. His eyes were haunted every morning when he woke up and he hadn't been sleeping for more than 3 or 4 hours at a time. Carol sat down next to him on his cot gently laying a hand on his stiff shoulders.

"Don't be sorry". Carol spoke softly.

"Don't ever be sorry". She didn't elaborate. She put a finger under his strong chin and made him left his face.

"Daryl you can't carry the weight of the world on your shoulders". She left his cell now to give him some space momentarily blocking the light that came through the bars as she passed. Daryl picked up the bowl of slop and ate absently. He didn't enjoy eating anymore. He couldn't remember what he had been dreaming about. It was there somewhere in the back of his mind but he couldn't quite get to it. Carols words rang in his ears.

'Don't be sorry', easier said than done Daryl thought to himself. He knew he had lost some time oversleeping so he hurriedly got ready for the day and set out to find Lacy. Daryl came across her sitting on the ground going through her bag. Her belongings had all been returned to her. She was no longer being locked in her cell and she could carry her weapon at her own discretion. The talk he had had with Rick must have been more successful than it had felt. Rick may not trust Lacy yet but he wasn't worried about her if he knew she would be with Daryl. Lacy felt much more at home with her few belongings there in front of her. Daryl whistled while he approached.

"Hey quit playin' house we got some huntin' ta do" He didn't stop to see if she was following. He didn't look back ether he just continued on his way. He heard light footsteps trotting up behind him just before he reached the door that let out of the prison. He didn't move his head to see who it was he knew it was her.

"What took ya so long?" He said with a slight malice. Everything he said was pointed. He couldn't help it.

"I was alphabetizing my CD's" She replied with sarcasm dripping off her voice. She was unsure about hunting with Daryl. She didn't want to leave the prisons fences they had been the safety she dreamed of for so long. What was worse was she didn't want to come back empty handed which she knew was a distinct possibility. As they reached the edge of the woods they had to slow their pace. The thick debris of the forest floor made it impossible to be completely silent but Lacy was careful where she placed her feet so she wouldn't make too much noise.

Daryl moved quietly as he listened for anything scurrying about. He scanned the ground for signs of animals. Lacy was like a ghost by his side. She managed to slip by him and circle around the outside of a tree. She was ahead of him now walking crouched low to the ground. She sees something already Daryl realized. The days' hunting was already off to a good start. He picked up his pace a tad and began passing her on her right. He realized now what she had seen. There were shuffling footprints, most likely that of a walker with a bum leg but under those where the remains of faint deer tracks. Daryl smirked.

"Yer good Red" The excitement of deer activity hit him. Where there was one there was a heard. This deer may very well have been eaten by the walker that left the tracks but if they could follow the trail it may cross paths with other deer trails. They may very well find some real game today. Daryl touched the dirt with two fingers. It was still damp; it had rained early in the morning and the trees continued to drip rain water off their leaves for sometime after that.

"These tracks are fresh, a few hours old tops" Daryl informed Lacy while he whipped his hand off on his jeans. Lacy focused hard on the ground looking over the tracks thoughtfully.

"These walker tracks are much more recent. The deer came through here before the walker by an hour at least. The reason the deer's tracks are intact at all is because they had already begun to dry when the walker came through and mucked them up." Daryl was impressed he nodded in agreement and pointed forward.

"Only one way ta find out what happened next." They began to move forward together. Daryl shot down a squirrel that ran past them, quietly retrieving it while Lacy continued to follow the tracks. As the number of small game they carried increased they moved on deeper and deeper into the woods. Time loosened them up. Both of them were more at home in the woods then the confined prison walls. Lacy felt strangely calm out here. Far better than she had anticipated .She had forgotten how open and spacious the forest felt. Being indoors had really been pushing her claustrophobia to the limits though she hadn't realized it so much before returning to the woods. Daryl watched her with interest.

"I didn't 'spect ya'd be so good at huntin'" Daryl said with as much respect as he had ever shown her.

"I knew you would be" Lacy replied matter o' factly. She crouched down with her hands on her knees.

"Is that right?" Daryl said slightly flattered by her statement. He shifted his weight around uncomfortably and picked at his hands, he put on a grimace before deciding it was safe to look at her again.

"I heard you breathing" Lacy said while she picked up a leaf. Concentrating hard she turned her head to look at a particularly track with interest. It was turned to the right slightly but the next couple tracks were jumbled and on top of each other then the tracks picked up again back to normal. The deer had begun to turn and changed its mind. Daryl didn't know what she meant about his breathing.

"What a ya mean?" He asked, bringing her back from her thoughts. She looked ahead to try and see what had drawn the deer to continue straight rather than veer right like it had started to.

"They day you found me; you were so quiet I almost didn't know you were there except for your breathing. You wheeze or whistle I suppose every third or fourth breath. I suspect you smoke or at least did. It's very subtle I kept hearing you breathing but I just couldn't place it then when you finally approached me it dawned on me. A little too late I guess" She shrugged her shoulders.

"Nah, just in time" Daryl countered remembering the day clearly. She had been ready and aimed at him so fast he had for a moment been genuinely afraid of her. Breathing he scoffed with amusement. She was very observant. The cigarettes in Daryl's pocket felt much heavier now. He resisted the urge to light one after being reminded of them.

"Raspberries" Lacy was still squatting next to the strange track. Daryl crouched next to her and followed her gaze.

"The deer was about to head this way" Lacy points at the out turned track then to the right.

"But then it saw the raspberries and continued on forward." She pointed to the bush now some 30 yards ahead of them. Daryl enjoyed watching Lacy track. Everyone who had gone hunting with him had told him they liked to watch him track, Maggie in particular. He had always found it annoying how many questions they all asked him. He knew now what it felt like to be them to watch it all unfold. He didn't need to take the lead of this hunt and for him the change of pace was like a breath of fresh air. They approached the raspberry bush, Daryl quickly pulled out a large zip lock bag he had in his battered back pack and emptied out its contents into his pack so he could begin filling it with berries. Lacy reached into her own bag and found a decent sized drawstring bag that she used to carry her gun before it had run out of bullets. She had ditched it a few months back. The bags material was a sporty waterproof knit which meant that the raspberries shouldn't seep through into her pack hopefully. Once they had filled up on raspberries and stored some to bring for the others they got back on the deer's trail making a mental note of where this bush was for future visits.

"Were you in the military?" Lacy asked Daryl. The air felt too silent even for her. Daryl was surprised he gave her that impression.

"Nah, worked in a bike shop. Spent most a my life tryin' ta stay outta that prison we live in" Daryl didn't want to be painted like a hero. He didn't want anyone looking up to him as it was. He certainly didn't want her thinking he was something he wasn't.

She had been right the first time she had guessed, he was just some redneck with daddy issues. He shook the self hate out of his brain and focused on the task at hand, more than he had all day. Lacy nodded, a bike shop seemed a good fit for him. Somewhere in her mind she had known he wasn't ex-military before she had even asked. She wondered briefly what he would think of the job she used to have to help get her through college.

She felt heat on her cheeks before deciding to find something else to talk about. A flash of Daryl's eyes went through her mind from the night before. He had looked wounded when she had brought up his father. Guilt squeezed her heart tightly, that topic was completely out of the question now. Lacy was about to speak again when she turned and saw Daryl wasn't by her side anymore. Her heart rate quickened as she scanned around her. That's when she saw him crouching low crossbow locked on target. The thud of an arrow hitting flesh was shortly followed by a high pitched squeal.

"Looky what we got here" Daryl sauntered forward towards his prize. The whimpering continued as the beast bled out slowly. He had pierced a decent sized gray coyote through the neck. It had been eating the deer they had spent all morning tracking. Lacy caught up now looking over the deer. It appeared that the coyote had been digging at the deer's neck but they only bite marks she could find where the coyotes. No biters had tainted this meat.

"Deer looks safe. We can take it back and eat what's left." Lacy said as she concluded it herself.

"Hoo hoo! we are gonna have a feast tonight" Daryl said shifting his weight back and forth and rubbing his hands together. Lacy saw the coyotes paw stop twitching as its life finally ended.

"Can I have its pelt?" Lacy asked without hesitation.

"What cha gonna do with it?" Daryl asked with an eye brow raised.

"I have a coat that needs a lining before for next winter." Daryl pulled his arrow loose splattering Lacy's jeans in blood. He pointed the bloody dirty arrow at her while he shifted around on his feet some more.

"Sure Red, on one condition. Ya gotta make me somethin' too." She crouched down and hoisted the Coyote onto her shoulder. Its body was still warm on her skin.

"Alright" She replied thinking it was a fair deal, she already had something in mind.

Daryl quickly gathered up the doe and followed her, back tracking his own footsteps towards the prison now. Daryl could get used to hunting with Lacy she was proving to be good company. Daryl wanted to think that they had found this food because they were skilled. Everyone gets lucky sometimes and the group was overdue for a good find like this but He felt they could keep this up. He had been failing these people, leaving them hungry for so long. It was time to make it up to them.

His eagerness to get back to the prison made him forget how far the walk was. It made him forget Lacy was beside him. Before long they were back. They had traveled in silence the whole way back both lost completely in their own worlds. It had been so peaceful. Daryl looked to meet Lacy's eyes appreciatively and give her his signature nod but found that she was gazing at the prison with a look that was much less enthusiastic than when she had seen it last.

"Come on Lazy Lacy" Daryl said shifting the weight of the deer on his shoulders. He couldn't stop without losing the ability to move at all. He called over his shoulder as he struggled on ward.

"I let you carry the light one so don't slow me down now." He heaved the deer further up on his back before beginning the trek towards the prison. He was growing exhausted under the weight but saw his goal in sight. He heard Lacy behind him yell breathlessly.

"Yours is missing a few pieces." He held in a smirk. Home sweet home he thought as he reached the gate. For once a hard day's work had really paid off.


	7. If There's a Wolf In My Heart So Be It

Lacy sat in her cell holding what looked to her like a useless trinket. She had been up all night and grew to hate her work more and more with each passing instance. Her fingers felt oafish and clumsy as they took on her delicate task. First she had been on night watch, then after, when she returned to her cell for some sleep, she had gotten caught up in making what she now held before her taking her all the way up until now as the sun rose.

In her hand was a very delicate figurine. She had carved it out of the bones of the deer they had hunted just 3 days before. The figure was of a wolf head that was only about the size of her thumb nail. She had originally planned to somehow attach it to a necklace but now she just wanted to throw it into the woods. It was meant for Daryl, she had told him she would make something for him in exchange for the coyote pelt. She looked at each detail her frustration mounting, the fur, the teeth, and the growl it held in its tiny but fierce eyes.

Her eyes were critical and unforgiving. It didn't match the picture in her mind. It was not good enough. In the last year her carving skills had grown rusty from disuse and she needed to practice her art again if she didn't want to lose it. On top of that it had yet to be bleached white by time or by chemical like she previously had used to speed up the process so it's off yellow color was unappealing and only added to Lacy's discontent. She let out an audible sigh before closing her hand around the figure and dropping her hand to her lap. She would just have to think of something else to give Daryl.

It was morning now, though Lacy wasn't feeling as tired as she had expected. She sat on her cot in the very same cell she had been locked in her first night there. Looking out she could see directly across to a small window also on the second level of the cell block. Light streamed thorough in colorful beams. Every particle of dust caught the light differently as they spiraled around like bugs flying. It was in its own way beautiful. Lacy often took moments like this one to remind herself of the incredible beauty of the simple things. She slid the figure into the breast pocket of her blouse and stood up. She thought for a moment, there must be something she could be doing to help now that everyone was getting up. Lacy was feeling antsy and was itching to go out hunting. She figured they must need some more food soon with all the people in the prison the deer and coyote couldn't last them that long. Never the less it had been three days with no hunting and with no hunting that meant no leaving the confines of the prisons fences. The feeling of walls was one that lacy would never appreciate the way the other people of the camp did. Where they saw safety she saw suffocation.

As Lacy hypnotically began taking down and folding laundry that was on clothing lines, she reflected on the claustrophobia she fought against. She saw it as a weakness a flaw. She hated it and was determined to never let the others know about it. There was so much out there to be afraid of. So many things had become dark and awful since the turn yet she was still as scared as a child when it came to being confined. Lacy didn't want to but she played back the memory in her mind.

Lacy couldn't see more than a few inches in front of her face, the darkness pierced everything around her and left no light to be found. Her hands grouped the walls as she paced and fumbled around the small damp room. She was only 12. The concrete walls were rough and cold on her hands as she felt the familiar blocks. One, two, three she counted them as she walked. There were 32 on this wall and 40 on the next. Her breathing was ragged the air felt heavy and she couldn't expand her lungs enough no matter how she tried. She focused on staying calm, hyperventilating would only kill her faster. Survival was most important. She sat now and scooted towards the middle of the room away from the walls that threatened to crush her alive. How long had she been down there? Without light or sound she had only a few senses to rely on and found time to difficult to track. Her attention span was short and frantic as panic often caused only furthering her detachment from time. Why? What did i do? Lacy asked herself. She had long given up hope she would ever know the answer.

Her mother was dead as far as Lacy knew and her father was a monster, her own personal bogie man. Lacy couldn't hold back the tears anymore and she felt them trickle down her face sideways and hit the ground underneath her head. Her hair stuck to her face and only made the room feel smaller. Her father was cruel at times but he loved her. Lacy knew he didn't mean to hurt her he was probably just drunk and forgot that he had put her down there. He would remember soon and let her out. He would apologize and hug her and buy her ice cream. Lacy denied even to herself what he really was. It was how she survived. She had lived so long knowing the truth but wouldn't admit it. That meant giving up. Suddenly the door at the top of the stairs opened and the brightest light imaginable blinded Lacy. She cried out but couldn't bring her hand up to cover her eyes. The pain of the light on her eyes made her cry harder and her chest heaved involuntarily. She felt hands on her that made her flinch.

Lacy shook her head to try and force her memories back. She had gotten so lost in her thoughts she had starred off into space no longer folding the pants she held for who knows how long.

"Earth to Lacy." Glenn was waving a hand in front of her face.

"Oh! S-sorry ah what's up?" Lacy fumbled around with the pants she held trying to look busy.

"Breakfast is ready, are you alright?" Glenn looked Lacy over she looked tired but mostly she looked scarred. They way she held her shoulders said she as on the defensive but she had only just woken up if anything now should be the time that she was the most relaxed. Glenn saw also the furrow in her brow as he waited for her to answer.

"Yeah I just didn't sleep very well." Lacy lied. Glenn knew immediately she was hiding the truth but he wasn't surprised. Though she had been there for a week or so now almost no one knew anything about her. She was always alone and always silent. They only people she ever seemed to spend time with were Daryl and Beth.

"Lacy" Glenn began hesitantly.

"This world we live in is harsh, it's dark, it's cruel and it's unforgiving. I hate this life sometimes but what always makes a difference, what I fight for is the people. Every person here is a survivor everyone is strong and we all have lost people". Glenn paused swallowing his emotions as faces flashed through his mind.

"You can talk to me. You can be one of us. You don't have to hide." He looks at Lacy now and saw mixed emotions on her face. Lacy hadn't realized she came across so cold. She appreciated these people for their company and generosity. She had only been trying to avoid being a hindrance. She had shown up and crashed their party out of the blue and considered every second she spent there a stolen one.

"Thank you" Lacy couldn't think of any other words to respond with. She opened her mouth but then closed it again as silence fell between them. Glenn had reached out to her and she couldn't reach back. She looked away from him and let his words hang in the air. Glenn just nodded and walked away. Lacy ran a hand over her face angry at herself for not being able to show Glenn how much she appreciated them. She wanted him to understand but she failed. Lacy felt like her organs were shaking she held her body tall and refused the quakes that her memories had brought on moments ago. Lacy hated thinking of her robbed childhood but found more and more in the world today she couldn't hide from it. Every time she was protecting herself she felt the shadow of what had already been her way of life once upon a time. Beth leaned by the railing without Judith for a rare moment. She waved to Lacy when Lacy saw her. Lacy lightly hopped up the stairs to meet Beth.

"Hey" Beth's voice chimed like a bird singing and made Lacy's nerves mellow out. Lacy had found solace in listening to Beth talk since arriving at the prison. The soothing tones wrapped around Lacy and tickled her like a caressing wind.

"Hey" Lacy replied her pained face cracking into a small for the first time that morning.

"You seem a little off, is everything okay?" Beth asked with concern.

"I'm alright now" Lacy couldn't lie to Beth but said what she did, knowing Beth wouldn't pry for more information.

"I'm glad to hear it" Beth gave Lacy a small nod. Lacy thought for a moment before pulling the wolfs head from her pocket and closing it inside her hand.

"What have you got there?" Beth asked with curiosity. Lacy took a breath preparing to explain.

"The other day I was hunting with Daryl and I made a deal with him that I could have the pelt from the coyote if I made him something too. I thought I knew what I'd make but I was up all night and this is all I have to show for it" Lacy opened her palm now so that Beth could take the bone carving. Beth's eyes fell on the figure in confusion before her gentle hands reached for it. She paused looking to Lacy for confirmation that she could pick it up and examine it. Lacy just nodded her eyebrows furrowed. Beth looked closely at the wolf.

"Is this made from bone?" She asked Lacy

"Yes it's from the deer. I was going to make him a necklace, with a coyote fang on either side of the wolf face because he reminds me of a wolf. The other night I realized he wasn't a bird of prey he was a lone wolf but it just turned out so messy I don't think I can give it to him. Now I have to think of something else to make him and" Beth put a hand up to quiet Lacy who had begun to ramble quickly.

"It's beautiful" Beth placed the figure back in Lacy's palm and folded Lacy's fingers over it.

"I didn't know you were so talented Lacy. I know Daryl will love it. Whether he will say so or not is up for debate but he will love it. Don't be so hard on yourself". Lacy's heart leaped at Beth's touch. She had often thought of Beth as desirable and beautiful but knew Beth to be a very religious and traditional girl. Lacy denied herself any thoughts of Beth and looked back at the Wolf in her hand. Lacy was growing more confused every day. She had been medicated before the apocalypse to treat her bipolar disorder and anxiety most of which she blamed on all her trauma. The medicine made her capable of understanding her emotions much easier. Now with her Past haunting her, her claustrophobia hunting her and her emotions on the run she was feeling less and less in control.

"Lacy". Beth whispered.

"Talk to me". Lacy couldn't resist Beth's request. She sighed lightly to afraid to meet Beth's piercing blue eyes.

"I'm bipolar. I'm just having a lot of internal struggles." Lacy felt a huge weight lift after saying the words out loud that was quickly followed up by the fear of being judged harshly for something she couldn't control. She followed up her statement with.

"Don't tell anyone alright, I'm not a nut job." Beth smiled slightly.

"I had a feeling it was something like that. Lacy you're so much stronger than you know. You are a fighter and a provider. So don't dwell. You're always alone and you're always so quiet. It's easy to lose your mind when you turn into a weapon against yourself. There was a time before we found the prison when I didn't want to live anymore." Lacy looked over at Beth now. She was surprised to hear something like that from her.

"I tried to kill myself. I had just lost all hope. My mother had turned and been shot in front of me and I just tortured myself with the images until it was too much." Beth's voice was oddly steady as she recalled something that sounded like a sensitive topic.

"In the end I realized that the people I was with were what mattered. When the whole world is out to get you, you can't be out to get yourself. You have to find people, good people. Then with your backs together you can take anything the world throws at you head on". Lacy was listening intently to Beth finding comfort in every word. She knew how right Beth was. She absently covered the scars on her wrists by pressing her arms into her sides. She hadn't noticed that Beth had ones just the same as hers though Lacy's were from long before the walkers. Beth smiled slightly and added

"I've seen them already" Lacy was momentarily embarrassed before changing the topic all together.

"Thank you Beth. You're the closest thing I've had to a best friend" Lacy considered adding 'since the world ended' which was the end to so many of her thoughts but Beth was the kind of friend that Lacy had NEVER had. She wondered if it was because she had pushed everyone away or if it was because Lacy had always been meant for a life like this. Lacy couldn't help feeling like she belonged here more than she had belonged anywhere in her life. Beth's delicate features turned into the most entrancing smile when she thanked Lacy for the compliment.

"So what's going on with you and Daryl?" Beth asked sounding for the first time in this conversation like the teenage girl she really was. Lacy snickered to herself. She looked up to Daryl for his strength. He was probably the person most like her in the whole camp.

"What do you mean?" Lacy asked innocently.

"I've seen the way he looks at you. He went to Rick to ask him to let you stay. So what's going on? He doesn't do things like that for just anyone." Beth had a mischievous look to her as the slight gossip in her came out. Lacy hadn't known that Daryl had gone to Rick. She was touched but also uncomfortable. She had wanted to earn her place herself.

"Nothing is going on really. He has been teaching me some stuff about hunting that I didn't know already. He's pretty intimidating most the time." Lacy fondly thought of the time she had been spending with him. She had also thought about Daryl a lot though she never once considered him romantically knowing he was, way, WAY out of her league. Any attempt would only leave her embarrassed and lonely. Lacy had gravitated towards Beth only after refusing herself the emotions she felt for Daryl. She looked again to the wolf she still held in her hand. If there was a wolf in her heart so be it. She looked over again to Beth seeing the light playing in her golden hair.

"Lacy, you can't tell me you spend all that time alone with him and you haven't noticed." Beth teased Lacy slightly. Lacy didn't want to talk about Daryl anymore she didn't want to give herself false hope.

"Beth he is someone that will never be in my reach". She placed her hand next to Beth's on the railing hoping to make a point.

"Finish the necklace and give it to him. Trust me okay?" Beth smiled and walked away now leaving Lacy to her thoughts. Lacy slowly began walking towards her cell thinking again and again about the things Beth had said. Had Daryl been looking at her differently than anyone else? Lacy suddenly stopped in her tracks. She was being ridiculous. She kicked herself. She was living in a world where humans were outnumbered by flesh eating undead fuck bags. How could she waste even a moment thinking about Romance? Beth or Daryl it didn't matter there where far bigger fish to fry and letting something as trivial as her emotions consume so much of her morning was stupid.

She went to her cell grabbing her bag which was much lighter now that she had unloaded a portion of her belongings and spread them around her cell. She still hated it in there and hadn't shut the door once since they stopped locking it. She carried her bow over her shoulder and trotted back down to the first floor of the prison passing Carol on the stairs. Lacy had been too busy talking with Beth to eat breakfast but found she wasn't very hungry regardless. She briefly hoped that Beth had eaten something.

Lacy b-lined for the yards hoping some fresh Georgia air would clear her head and help her focus on something more productive. When she stepped outside the hot Georgia sun began beating down on her mercilessly. One thing she could say about Georgia was that its summers were far from mild. The light breeze made the heat bearable and Lacy saw she wasn't the only one outside. Looking for some time alone outside of the dark thick walls she found her way to the middle of the field and sat lightly in the grass. She ran her hands over the blades of grass feeling them tickle against her palms. The grass was almost sticky and it was much taller than your typical yard.

Lacy fumbled around in her pack before pulling out a scrap of deer hide she had been drying and turning into leather the best she could without the convenience of the 21st century world. She had let the hide soak in water and then dry out. She had scrapped any remaining flesh from the hide and had de-haired the other side using a tiny bit of lime she had found among the canned food they had stored in the prison. She had mixed the lime with water and soaked the hide again. Then she had used tree bark to make a sort of tea that she had tanned it in. It wasn't the best leather most certainly not the highest quality but she could easily make the string for the necklace out of it. She looked at the piece of leather for a few moments longer turning it around in her hands.

Then an idea came to her, one that seemed so much more appropriate for Daryl. A wrist brace. He used a cross bow so he didn't functionally need the brace the way he would if he used a bow like her but it seemed like something he would be much more likely to wear. She pulled the coyote fangs out of the bags inside pocket and looked at the hide again. She smiled to herself taking a sharp tooth in fingers and pressing it to the leather.

Daryl saw Lacy sitting in the field outside the prison from the guard tower. She had been there for some time now. She was just sitting it seemed. He couldn't mistake who it was her vibrant hair color was only made brighter by the Georgia sun. Daryl wiped sweat from his forehead scanning the horizon again before looking back at Lacy. She was becoming a larger part of his daily life every day. He ignored the urge to go to her.

He would wait for the next person to take watch. He had been there a while it couldn't be much longer. Besides he wasn't about to let Lacy start effecting him so obviously. He already had to deny to Beth that anything was going on. Her gossipy interest in them irked Daryl. He didn't like her reading into it so much. Especially when he wasn't even sure what was going on. He certainly didn't have time for flowery girly garbage and he wasn't interested in fooling himself. Never in his life had he worried about girls. He had always known that no one worth having would think twice about him. He had resigned to filling his loneliness with bar skanks. He had told himself that he was using them before they could use him. That it wasn't wrong. That they asked for it with the way they had thrown themselves at him for free drinks. He would leave in the night and he wouldn't look back.

Now those days were over and he filled his loneliness other ways. He wouldn't talk to people because opening up to them would only make it easier for them to hurt him, it would make him too vulnerable but his loneliness was slightly lifted by just spending small amounts of time with a select few people at the prison. That would have to be enough. Daryl crossed his arms tucking his hands under and leaning his weight into the wall. He heard footsteps on the stairs knowing his shift was over he looked expectantly at the door. Maggie peeked into the room with a small smile

"Hey your free to go, Tyreese and I are on." She looked around the room quickly.

"Were you up here alone?" Ricks 2 people on guard rule flashed through her mind. Daryl waved her off without saying anything before starting for the stairs. Tyreese and Maggie exchanged a look as he passed them. They each took a spot in the tower so they could get a good view in each direction. Daryl closed the door behind him. His feet carried him towards Lacy before he had told them too. As he got closer his heart beat sped slightly which pissed Daryl off enough to slow it back down. Lacy hid something behind her back as he approached her.

"What ya got Red?" Lacy hesitated as she stood up

"You have good timing" She said flatly.

"Do I?" Daryl's curiosity was peaking as he waited for Lacy to reveal what she was keeping from him.

"You wanted me to make you something in exchange for that pelt right? Well here it is" She pulled out a leather bracer from behind her back. Daryl had almost forgotten about that deal. He hadn't been serious. He only wanted to pick on Lacy not actually demand a gift. He was momentarily embarrassed as he considered reaching out for it. He hesitated then took the item into his hands. The leather was soft and supple though its edges were raw. Leather didn't fray like fabric so there was no need to finish the edges. Daryl looked at the lacing. She had pounded holes down two edges and laced the bracer with thinner leather cording presumably the same leather. The other side was intricate. It had both the coyotes fangs on it and a tiny detailed wolfs head. His thumb and forefinger probed the wolf. It appeared to be bone as well. He held the bracer close to his face looking at the detailing around the wolf in the leather. There were faint designs worked into the leather all the way up to the thumb hole and around the other side. Daryl was speechless.

Lacy was growing more and more nervous as he examined her gift. She watched as he passed over each piece of the bracer. She knew each of its flaws. Where she had slipped and misaligned a marking or where a hole wasn't aligned just right. She didn't point them out hoping he wouldn't notice. Every second lasted an eternity.

"Ya didn't have ta do this" Daryl didn't know what else to say it took him long enough to come up with that pathetic attempt at a thank you.

"A deal is a deal. Your kill your pelt." Lacy was all business fighting back against the feelings she attached to her gift. She denied them even to herself. It's only fair she reminded her emotions. You owed him. Now you don't. That's all. Daryl looked at it holding it like it was made of glass though he knew it was much sturdier than that. It had been so long he couldn't remember the last gift he was given. Whatever it was it wasn't hand made and so thoughtfully appropriate. He quickly decided the best thing he could do would be to put it on. He used the busy work of loosening the laces to cover his lack of words. Lacy relaxed slightly when she what he was doing. He must like it she thought, or else he is humoring me. Daryl moved his arm around feeling the leather on his skin. He took his cross bow and aimed it towards the fence feeling the brace on his wrist moving with his muscles. The warmness he felt flooded his mind with beginnings of statements. 'This is so…', 'I've always…', 'I appreciate...' Nothing felt right. Lowering his weapon Daryl tuned back to face Lacy. She saw something in his eyes she couldn't identify.

"Thank you" Daryl hadn't said much at all but Lacy felt between them so much more communicated. She appreciated his simple response and nodded rather than say anything more. Lacy couldn't bear the situation anymore and she turned to look out at the fences. She probed her mind for anything to talk about. Daryl watched her. She held her face in concentration. He wanted to know what she was thinking. He was very aware of the new addition to his wardrobe. He wasn't accustomed to the feeling of the brace on his wrist. Lacy hated the butterflies in her stomach. It was so much easier to talk to Beth. She could pretend nothing was there. Beth would never suspect anything and she could talk, feel close to her. With Daryl she second guessed herself. She worried about what he thought of her. She felt foolish.

"So what were ya doin' out here anyway?" Daryl asked Lacy.

"I couldn't be inside anymore." She answered. Daryl was beginning to catch on to a trend with Lacy. She seemed to always be looking for exits. She spent half her time outdoors. Or when she was indoors she was on the second floor closest to the windows. He had often seen her cell door wide open at night, the only door that was open in the whole cell block. He didn't comment that he had noticed. He didn't want her to know just how much attention he was paying to her. He wasn't comfortable knowing it himself.

"I was thinkin' a goin' huntin' again tomorrow. We still got meat but I figured we could check out that raspberry bush and maybe look for some other stuff like that." Daryl peered from the side of his eyes to see how Lacy responded. She still looked forward but she smiled lightly before turning to answer

"Need any help? "

"Need? Nah but ya can tag along if yer bored or somethin'" Daryl didn't want to sound like he was inviting her even though he very clearly was. You're doing what Rick asked taking her under your wing Daryl lied to himself. He moved his shoulders remembering the wings on the back of his vest. Lacy ignored his passive dismissal about needing help. She knew how he was. It was the lone wolf coming out of him. She nodded and replied

"Something tells me I will be"


	8. The Hottest Part of a Flame

The group had mostly congregated in the cafeteria. There was a calm and almost joyful air enveloping them as they all talked amongst themselves. They were all together for the sole purpose of not being alone. They all had a core need to feel alive to be reminded that living isn't just surviving. They all longed to feel close to other human beings but none of those needs were said out loud. They didn't have to be it was understood. Lacy had originally decided to stay in her cell she didn't feel that she belonged in the groups bonding time. She wasn't one of them she would only make things awkward for them so to avoid ruining a good night for her camp mates Lacy would sacrifice her own needs. Just as she was getting comfortable on her cot she heard hasty footsteps approaching.

"Aw hell nah!" Daryl's now familiar drawl came to Lacy's ears before she could even see him.

"Get the fuck up Red if I'm stuck hangin' with these dipshits so are you" He pointed a finger at her looking at her from under his eye lashes with his eyebrows raised. Lacy felt warmness because of his invitation though the bell in her mind still rang out that she would only be in the way.

"I don't want to crash your party, I mean I'm not one of you guys I'd just …I don't know…fuck it up" Lacy's self pity was completely disregarded by Daryl.

"That's bull shit and ya fuckin' know it, now get yer skinny little ass into that cafeteria 'fore I pick ya up and carry ya there." Lacy remembered the last time Daryl had to carry her and a flush of heat reached her ears.

"Alright alright, I'm getting up boss man" Lacy didn't miss the relief in his eyes though it was brief. Daryl hadn't intended for Lacy to see it but he had wanted her to join them that night for his own benefit. He was growing to really appreciate her opinion and liked to have her nearby. They walked together in silence which was another thing Daryl liked about Lacy; she didn't feel the need to fill every moment with conversation like so many of the others. It was exhausting talking to most of them, the dead air like the dead around them didn't sit well with so many of them and so they attempted to create conversation even when it didn't feel natural, they forced it out of fear of what would be left behind if they didn't speak. They talked with urgency, not knowing if this would be the last conversation they had with each other. That emotional weight was too much for Daryl and it kept him from talking to too many of them. Daryl took a deep breath before focusing on something else, anything else. Lacy watched him with her peripherals and he was aware of it. They were constantly sizing each other up but Daryl enjoyed it, it was almost like a game to him. As the approached the destination they began to walk slower. It was both of them lingering in their own moments, unwilling to let it end so soon. Lacy met Daryl's eyes and forgot for a moment that the world was gone. She considered briefly what meeting him would have been like before all of this. She didn't consider it for long, it didn't matter, she would only begin to miss the world from before. As Daryl reached up to touch his chin Lacy saw on his arm the bracer she had made for him.

"You're wearing it?" Lacy couldn't stop herself from asking. Though the answer was obvious she longed for Daryl's approval which immediately made her feel like a stupid teenage girl. It had been so long since she was or could act like a teenage girl though and the influx of emotion was a welcome change to the cold, dead, calculating person she had to be these days.

"Ya" Daryl replied scuffing his feet a bit.

"fits nice" he added in an attempt to give Lacy something more of an answer. Rather than continue that conversation Daryl pushed open the doors to the cafeteria. As Daryl walked in with Lacy by his side all eyes in the cafeteria shot up. Carols eyes were the first Lacy saw. Lacy decided that the empty seat next to Carol was as good as any but was slightly surprised when Daryl made his way for it before her. The group had recommenced the random chatter as Lacy walked the perimeter of the circle their chairs had formed and leaned against a wall off to the side. Lacy couldn't help noticing Rick wasn't here. Though it seemed most everyone else was. He must be on watch Lacy thought.

"Okay, so I'm dying to know something mystery girl" Glenn's words were directed at Lacy. She shifted uncomfortably.

"Yeah? What is it?" She asked unusually disconcerted by the oncoming question.

"What did you do before this?" It was the same question Carol had asked her.

"I was an English student in college."

"Yeah Carol told me that, you had to have a job though right? I just can't picture you filing papers or anything." The curious eyes of everyone in the room hit her. Lacy found herself looking for Daryl's and was surprised when she saw his eyes full of wondering on her too.

"Ah, well I mean, it doesn't matter now right?" Lacy tried to divert the question as she bit her nails nervously.

"Come on, I was a pizza delivery boy. It doesn't get much worse than that right?"

"It just needed to pay the bills and I did "Lacy said again grasping at any chance to avoid the truth they wanted to get from her. The group didn't let up, now Beth was contributing.

"Come on Lace, now you have ME wondering." Beth was immediately followed by Sasha.

"We won't laugh, I promise."

"FINE!" Lacy finally burst out; all the eyes probing her made her feel naked and ashamed.

"I worked at Hooters." The room was quiet for a long moment then somewhere in the group a snicker was heard. After that an avalanche of laughter from everyone came over the room.

"You said you wouldn't laugh." Lacy reminded them a crimson blush all over her face and neck as slight anger welled up in her.

"I'm sorry ...I just…never thought.." Sasha trailed off between fits of laughter.

Lacy had the overwhelming urge to leave but just as she pushed off the wall to walk out Carol came to her rescue.

"Well aren't you a rare breed, Pretty and dangerous" Lacey was slightly comforted by the compliment but was still mortified that she had revealed something she never planned to talk about again.

"Lighten up its all in good fun" Glenn said now with a slightly teasing tone. Lacy smiled, it was a LITTLE funny to think of her old hooters uniform in the worlds today. It was probably the least practical uniform any job had ever given her.

"Okay enough picking on the poor girl" Hershel jumped in and steered the conversation away from Lacy which she was thankful for. The night continued on and food was passed around. Lacy felt herself loosening up as she listened to the group sharing stories and laughing together. Daryl hadn't said a word the entire night but he had always appeared to be listening. Lacey's ears perked up when she heard the mentioning of a calendar.

"Wait you guys have a calendar?" Lacy jumped back into the conversation now.

"Well we aren't exactly sure if it's accurate anymore. A girl named Andrea was keeping it for a long time then it was sort of passed on to the rest of us. We try to keep pretty good track but who's to say we aren't months off by now" Lacy didn't care if it wasn't accurate she hadn't had a good idea of the date in so long. Her only calendar had been the seasons but in a state she wasn't familiar with that method hadn't served her very well.

"Well according to this calendar what is the date?" Lacy asked now growing more and more interested.

"Ah, I think its June 10th why?" Lacy tried to conceal her shock. She had been way off on her guess back in the woods. Her 27th birthday was tomorrow.

"Lace?" Beth prompted when She hadn't said anything.

"Oh, its nothing." Lacy said waving her hand a small quiver in her voice.

"Didn't look like nothin'" Daryl's gruff voice came from what seemed like nowhere. Lacy met his eyes briefly before diving headfirst into another conversation with the group.

"Well, according to your calendar… tomorrows my birthday.." Lacy felt a tear begin to form in her eye though she couldn't say why. She blinked it away furiously.

"Your birthday!?" Carl's voice came chiming to Lacy's ears.

"How old are you going to be?" The group laughed together before Tyreese leaned close to Carl

"You never ask a lady how old she is. They don't like it" Lacy quickly interceded that comment

"No Tyreese its okay. I'll be 27 Carl. Today's a different world, I'm proud I've lasted another year. The last thing I care about is whether I'm getting crow's feet or gray hair"

"Hear hear" Carol added lifting her glass and nodding at Lacy's statement.

"Why would you get crow's feet?" one of the young girls asked wrinkling her nose and looking at Lacy's boots. Another chorus of laughter rang in the cafeteria. Lacy watched as Carol leaned and explained to the girl what crow's feet were pointing to her own eyes.

Lacy was growing more and more exhausted by the minute and the idea of her birthday was keeping her from paying much attention to the conversation anymore. She quietly walked along the wall towards the door praying that no one would stop her from retreating to solitude. Once she had cleared the door Lacey let out an audible sigh. Rather than return to her cell she decided to go out for some air. Lacy couldn't have been outside for more than 5 minutes before she heard the door to the prison creek quietly open. Soft footsteps behind her told her exactly who it was. Daryl had found her.

"Hooters huh?" Daryl asked from behind her. Lacy scuffed

"I should have known that's what you came to talk about" She smiled a genuine smile now.

"Nah, just don't seem like ya." Daryl pulled his cigarettes out of his chest pocket. Lacy's eyes fell on them longingly before she quickly looked away focusing instead on the distant walkers roaming by the fence.

"ya want one?" Daryl asked a cigarette hanging between his lips the pack outstretched towards her. Lacy hesitated weighing her own desire out before caving and taking one. He held up his lighter for her and she took a quick drag to start it off. Lacy's head rushed immediately. Daryl looked at lacy's smile after she exhaled. It seemed the smile was for herself. Happiness not projected for anyone but just there as is.

"I'm not the same girl I used to be" Lacy said now, finding courage in the smoke she held in her lungs.

"I was weak, I was stupid, I had a job where I got paid to pretend I didn't care when sleaze balls hit on me. I was all kinds of fucked up for reason I can't even begin to explain nor will I ever. What I am now. What I had to become. This is the 'me' I want to be. At least now I don't have to look at everyone I meet and wonder if they know, If they see all my dark secrets. I don't have to worry that everything I was fighting to hide would come tumbling out into the light." Lacy didn't know why she was saying all that she was. Of all people Daryl would be the least likely to care but he as so easy to talk to. He didn't say much which made it feel like he was listening whether he really was or not. Daryl was very aware of how close together they stood. He was afraid to even shift his weight in case it drew attention to their proximity and she stepped away. He chose instead to let his toes go numb on his left foot and enjoy the closeness a little longer.

"Yet even now I can't escape that awful world we use to live in. There are still pieces that follow me everywhere. I actually prefer risking my life everyday to try and claim some kind of place in a group of people I know nothing about to facing those stupid fucking ghosts of a life I never wanted."

"We all got ghosts." Daryl's voice seemed deeper than usual only emphasized by the shadow over his eyes and the scruff on his chin.

"yeah? What ghosts do you have?" Lacy asked skeptically. Daryl shook his head.

"Ghost a' my' brother, Ghost a' my father, Ghost a' me" He shrugged his shoulders and took another drag looking away from her. Lacy felt that a wall was down. Even in saying something so little he had opened up to her in some way. Really she hadn't said much more than he had and to her it felt like opening up. She let her arm fall loose and felt as it brushed against Daryl's legs. She quickly brought her arm back up and crossed placing her hand in the crock of the arm still holding her cigarette. She had not realized how close together they had been standing. Daryl shifted his weight now moving only so slightly to the right. He felt the relief of blood flowing into his toes as pins and needles shot through his foot.

"I'm sorry." Lacy said without really knowing why.

"What for?" Daryl asked an eye brow raised.

"I don't know " Lacy blushed a little, she hoped the dark hid it from his view.

"No use in bein' sorry if ya don't know what for." He leaned his head back against the brick exhaling straight into the air. The smoke caught the light as it danced away looking almost like a cloud in front of the moon. Lacy's eyes trailed the smoke back down to his lips before quickly looking to the ground. Lacy put out her cigarette with great disappointment. She had wished it lasted longer. Daryl followed suit.

"We should head back in, make sure everyone's alright" Daryl's sense of personal responsibility for every member of the group was attractive to Lacy. She liked that he was always watching their backs, checking on everyone. He had this air about him as if he didn't care but every action he took said something quite the opposite.

"Alright" Lacy was bold for a moment in walking in front of him towards the door. She stepped as close to him as she could while she did it feeling the air between her arm and his chest like electricity. He shoved off from the wall just a second to early lightly touching the fabric of his sleeveless button up to her back. The tension building in her made her blood pound in her ears. She scolded herself for such silliness but couldn't help but enjoy every second of the dance she had going with him. Daryl had watched her pass him with intensity. He longed to reach out and touch her skin but denied himself even the littlest hope of ever acting on that desire.

He followed her back into the prison and caught himself taking her in as she walked. Her strong shoulders the slight swing of her hips the way her small hands fluttered by her sides. The walls of the hall they were in were cold and moist like cement often was but most noticeably it made the air seem stale after having been outside. The lack of windows made it impossible to see more than a few feet in front of your face which was in most cases a risky thing to deal with but now a days was probably the stupidest idea you could have. When Lacy had left the cafeteria Daryl had known somehow she would go outside. He also knew that with it being the beginnings of night that she wouldn't be safe wandering back. He had decided to go after her if only to make sure she got back safely, that was something Rick would have him do. That was why he went to her. That reason alone. Daryl's denial was halted by Lacy's sudden stop in the hall just before the door that lead back to the cell block. Lacy's heart was pounding as the hall way walls closed in on her. No not now was all she could think as the claustrophobia reached up and closed its hand around her throat. She couldn't face the bars of the cells right now but she also couldn't face the brick walls that pressed from every side. Her breath was heaving and her chest was aching with the effort. She felt like she might explode from the pressure while also feeling that she would implode for the lack of space to explode into. Daryl's eyes scanned the immediate area for any signs of danger when he found none he stepped up to look at Lacy wondering what it was that had made her stop. He saw beads of sweat on her forehead and panic in her eyes.

"What is it Red?" Daryl's voice sounded miles away to Lacy. 'Oh great he noticed you idiot. Fuck get it together now!' Lacy's own thoughts attacked her causing the situation to only escalate. 'Control it Lacy you have to control it. You can't be weak. Don't let them see.' She chanted in her mind anything she could to motivate her body to listen. She felt hands on her shoulders, the underwater distant voice reaching her again

"Lacy?" She tried to form words to assure him that she was fine but she couldn't make her voice work. The hand inside her throat tightened around her esophagus barley letting a whisper of air though. Lacy's body was in full panic she felt the sudden urge to run as fast as she could back outside. Her mind no longer able to focus on one thought for more than a brief second kept the message from reaching her feet. She frantically tried to regain control of herself. What had caused this stupid attack she demanded for a moment? It occurred to Daryl now what exactly was happening, The pieces fit together. She left her cell door open at night something no one else in the camp did. She was constantly going outside and leaning in the far back of the group. Her words from early came back to him "There are still pieces that follow me everywhere". She was claustrophobic. Daryl instantly backed a few feet away sensing his hands on her shoulders would only make things worse. He had no idea how to help her but he knew she needed to calm down.

"Hey, look at me. Not at the walls at me" Lacy focused hard on the blurry dark man in front of her

.

"Take a deep breath as much air as ya can"

"I.. Cant.." Lacy gasped, Daryl clapped his hands loudly making her jump a little.

"Bull shit. Let's go. In and out nice and slow." Lacy raggedly forced an inhale and let it sputter out.

"That was shit. Try again." Daryl's blue eyes bore into hers like the hottest part of a flame. Lacy closed her eyes and pushed her lungs, filling them with as much air as she could before exhaling again this time much stronger.

"There ya go red, yer getting' there but if ya think that'll due yer a fucking idiot, Try again." This time when he challenged her Lacy's eyes opened and she looked at Daryl with determination. Feeling the weight on her lifting she took in another big breath. She stood a little taller the slight quiver and weakness she was feeling greatly lessened by the oxygen in her blood.

"Y'alright?" Daryl asked now, sincerity in his eyes.

"Yeah." Lacey answered embarrassed beyond words. She wasn't sure how he had figured everything out and known what to say to her. it amazed her how astute and quick he was in times of importance.

"Look Daryl, please don't tell anyone. I usual can keep it under control" She pleaded with the man who had just saved her.

"Don't ya think they should know?" Daryl asked skeptically

"The last thing I need is to be treated like an invalid, I'm fine I swear I just had a moment but it won't happen again." Daryl didn't know if he agreed but it wasn't his business. He nodded his head at Lacy he opened the door to the cell block and waited for her to go through. Lacy couldn't meet his eyes anymore so instead looked darkly towards the ground. She b-lined straight for her cell before Daryl had time to close and lock the door behind him she was gone. It was getting late now and most of the other people around had begun making their way to their beds.

Daryl couldn't do that though, he had too much on his mind. He climbed his way up the stairs to his favorite perch and sat on the railing. From their he could see Lacy's open cell door as well as everyone else's cells. He watched them all from above keeping a keen eye on the doors. He would sleep but not until he was sure that they were all safe for the night. No stranglers would escape his watch. Not tonight, not ever.


	9. Black as Ink

It's odd how water, though colorless, can be so dark. Water is clear and yet no light can penetrate it to its core. At its deepest any body of water is pitch black. Lacy wanted so badly to see something, anything but there wasn't a chance of that happening. Not here. She had been here before, in this dream before. She could feel the familiar sea bed beneath her soft and cold but somehow she just couldn't wake up. There was no air. Water filled her mouth and nose, it burned behind her eyes. She could feel the cold touch of the water so deeply in her core that she felt it must have filled her every vein. She was becoming the water. She was coming apart at the seams and dispersing through the liquid, blood mixing with the ocean black as ink. There was an enormous amount of pressure holding her arms down. She couldn't move. 'Scream. You need to scream'. She thought that if she could scream she would wake up. That she needed to break the weight on her chest and breathe. She needed to do something. Her mind was growing frantic as she failed over and over again. Being aware of the dream only made it more frustrating and horrifying. 'You're weak' she told herself. 'You can do this. It's not real'.

The air that pulled into Lacy's lungs tasted sweeter than any candy she could remember. Awake at Last. As the fog lifted from her brain it took Lacy a moment to realize she wasn't alone. That she hadn't woken up by herself.

"Are you alright? You're bleeding" The voice of the angel who had rescued Lacy belonged to Beth. The room was dark which meant it must be the middle of the night. Lacy felt hollow like everything she had leaked into that water was left there and the empty carcass that woke up wasn't really her. Yet her instincts were prepared for whatever danger had brought Beth to her.

"Beth? What's wrong?" Lacy wiped her hand under her nose coating the back of her hand in the sticky blood that continued to pour freely. She was all business, shed deal with herself when Beth was safe.

"I was up checking on Judith, I heard you screaming" Beth's voice was fearful. Lacy's heart sank. She knew she was frightening Beth. Lacy through her legs over the side of her cot and rested her forehead in her palms.

"Beth. You can go." A warm hand rested on her shoulder and gave her a small squeeze. Lacy lingered in the feeling though her brain had already accepted Beth's departure.

"Let's get you cleaned up first" Beth left the cell for a moment with Lacy's surprised eyes following her only to return shortly with a damp rag and a candle. She placed the candle on Lacy's small bedside table. As Beth cleaned the blood from Lacy's face and neck Lacy stared at the candle, its wax was dripping onto the little lacy table cover it sat on cooling at the bottom and hardening. She watched as the flame continued to jump around frantically. It mesmerized her. She thought of the incredible discovery that fire was. The first person to see it must have felt such amazement.

"Lacy? Look at me." Lacy snapped out of her trance and looked at Beth in the candle light. Her golden hair looked a blaze as the light flickered over it. Shimmers ran from her scalp as though she were glowing. Lacy could feel a small smile growing over her lips as she looked at Beth in wonderment.

"Thank you, for taking care of me Beth"

"You're sure you're okay? You haven't said anything about your nightmare. You haven't said anything at all. Do you always get nose bleeds this bad? I can go wake daddy." The worry on Beth's face should have set off an alarm. She wanted so badly to reach out and touch Beth's face and make the frown on her lips leave. Lacy felt as if she were another person. She hadn't been in control of herself this whole time. She was distracted and unable to communicate. She still hadn't said anything to reassure Beth. She knew she needed to explain herself; to tell Beth it was alright. She knew it but she couldn't do it. She couldn't bring words to her lips. She looked at Beth now as Beth waited for her answer and something came over her. Lacy slid her hand behind Beth's head snaking it through her soft golden hair and pulled her in. The heat that rushed to her lips in anticipation was unbearable. Her lips crashed over Beth's and Lacy's heart soared. For a sweet instance everything was perfect. Then it was over. Beth clambered away crawling backwards on the floor as far away from Lacy as the small cell would allow.

"Beth, wait…I" Beth bolted from the cell the echoes of her feet on the stairs bounced off the walls in every direction. 'What have you done you idiot' Lacy felt like she had swallowed a boulder. She couldn't understand what had come over her. What possessed her to ruin everything her and Beth had. She was one of the few friends Lacy had in this life. She didn't know but she was beginning not to care. If Beth hated her now so be it. Lacy starred flatly at her cell wall. She didn't move, she still sat exactly where she had been when she first told Beth to leave. She still felt like there was a weight holding her arms down. Slowly the candle began to grow dim. It had burned out just before dawn. The transition of light was the only way Lacy knew time had passed. She replayed Beth's horrified face as she retreated. She plastered it in her mind and told herself only a monster can make an angel look so sad. 'Get a grip!' her inner voice sounded through the cloudy haze she sat in. Then just like that she was up. She stood up immediately suddenly so full of energy she felt she could run for miles. Lacy paced around her room.

The situation was finally sinking in fully. She had fucked up but more importantly she had spent a whole night in some sort of trance for who knows what reason. She was all kinds of crazy might as well just add another cat to the bag. The sounds of her camp mates waking sent a quiver up her spine. Lacy couldn't face them. Not today. She needed to be far away. She couldn't run into Beth she couldn't see any of them. Lacy grabbed her bag and her bow and headed straight outside. With fences every where she couldn't exactly escape unnoticed, so she did the next best thing she climbed to the roof. Lacy sat in direct sunlight now feeling so completely opposite then she had just hours before when she had been in complete darkness. She was electric her mind unable to keep a single thought. Lacy had been absently scrapping her knuckles against the rough concrete for a while now trying to create something to focus on. 'Think of the pain on your knuckles. Focus on this one thing.' There were so many thoughts going through her head she had trouble holding onto anything except her knuckles. Time seemed completely inconceivable to her today. Had it been an hour? Three? Or just a few minutes perhaps. The closest door to her burst open and Lacy heard voices.

"She has ta be somewhere, Maggie was in the tower said aint nobody gone out." Daryl's rough voice was only slightly more welcome than the voice she heard next.

"I'm telling you Daryl something's come over her, She wasn't herself. What if she's done something awful."

"I'm tellin' ya Barbie, Lacy aint no quitter. Aint no way, no how that's what this is. She's prolly just sick of all yall's bullshit. Needed some space". The way Daryl defended her reminded Lacy of how easy it was to be around him. She was interested, focusing much more easily now. The two people she cared most for talking about her, in front of her, without knowing she was there. It doesn't get much juicier than that.

"Daryl if you think you know her so well then just help me find her."

"Ya ever think maybe she don't wanna be found?" Lacy could see in her mind's eye that scowl Daryl was undoubtedly giving Beth now.

"Of course I've thought that, which is why I need you to help me. Look you didn't see her last night. I'm terrified for her. "

"Maybe ya shouldn't take a kiss like such a bad omen" Daryl spat his words at Beth like acid. He was pissed for having thought for a moment he had a chance with Lacy. Now it seemed that even in the apocalypse he had no game. He got beat by a chick, the farmer's daughter no less. Lacy buried her face in her arms. 'He knows, Daryl knows'. It was stomach churning embarrassment at its worst. Somehow this had been her worst fear. Not the eyes that would follow her around camp. Not the fact that undoubtedly there was someone in this camp who would give her shit for being bisexual. The darkest thought that had lodged in her mind was having to learn what Daryl thought of her now.

"Look I don't need ya trailin' me all day like some lost puppy. Ya want me ta find her fine. Give me some God damn time". That must have been enough of an answer because Beth turned and left silently. As soon as the door clicked Daryl whistled three simple notes. 'There is no way has he figured out you're up here' Lacy sat unsure of what his whistle meant fearing the worst. Then came his voice.

"Listen Red, Ether ya come down, or I go up" Lacy closed her eyes and didn't make a sound afraid to even breathe. She wanted him to think he had been wrong. She heard the familiar sound of an arrow cutting through the air. She opened her eyes just in time to see the arrow land a foot to her left and roll slightly towards her.

"Was I close?" Lacy sighed giving in to him was too easy.

"Missed by a mile redneck, why don't you go back to the shooting range and give a girl some peace"

"I could a told Beth ya were up there, I didn't. I think that's enough peace". His voice was growing louder as he climbed the very same pipe she had climbed to reach the roof. She was glad he hadnt told Beth where she was, She owed him for that much at least. As his dirty blond hair appeared over the ledge Lacy felt tears welling in her eyes.

"Beth thinks ya gonna opt out" His eyes were all business as he sat a foot or so away. He ignored her tears completely. She was glad; discussing it would only make her more ashamed.

"You know, of all the crazy things I've thought in the last 24 hours suicide wasn't one of them. It's a good thing too because if I'd thought of it I might of done it". Lacy couldn't help a chuckle, somehow it seemed humorous to her. She looked up and saw anger on Daryl's face and any hint of the smile she had just held was gone in a flash.

"Is that funny? So ya kissed Barbie n' ya shouldn't have. That's the last straw? There are rottin' bodies walkin' round, there are people diein' everyday. Get yer head out of yer ass and move on. There aint that many people left in the world, can't start losin' em over high school musical bullshit like this". Daryl's chest was puffed out in defense. He wasn't just defending himself or the camp he was defending her from her own attack. He protected everyone at all times. He didn't chose to it just happened.

"I'm sorry" Those too simple words held a million apologies. She was sorry for involving him, for kissing Beth, sometimes for joining this group In the first place. Daryl tossed a small book into Lacys lap.

"What's this?" Lacy asked as she hesitantly picked up.

"Happy birthday" Lacy had completely forgotten today was her birthday. It had slipped her mind in all of the self pity. With the book in her hands Lacy suddenly felt guilty on a whole new level. Then just like that she shut it off. It was time for her to stop being so selfish. When she opened the book she saw that it was blank.

"English major right?" Daryl asked as if he was unsure but he wasn't. He had been listening very carefully the other night when she spoke of her past with the group. Daryl saw this broken girl in front of him and he didn't know how to fix her. He was uncomfortable as he saw her tears falling down her pale cheeks. She was usually so strong and level headed it was what had made her so attractive to him originally. Now he looked at her in this broken state and all he wanted was to heal her. To bring back the fiery Lacy that made his days better. He didn't even care that she was most likely a lesbian though he might have before this world.

"But I don't have a pen" Lacy argued still in disbelief. She had wanted so badly to write ever since she had left home. One of her biggest regrets was leaving behind her poetry journal. She had always kept it to let out all that she held inside. Suddenly the idea of starting that again was the most enticing thing she could imagine.

"Yeah, I thought a that too" He tossed a package of BIC pens into her lap now.

"Daryl… I don't know what to say. Thank you. I can't imagine a more perfect gift." Daryl looked at his hands waiting for the conversation to turn over he didn't like compliments. When there was silence Daryl worried about what Lacy was thinking. After her nonchalant comment about suicide he was nervous. He didn't know what was going on inside her head but he would be responsible if she died. He had given her the idea. Nerves made him more talkative than usual.

"So, Ya always been a lesbian?" Daryl asked flatly. He was caught off guard by the loud boisterous laughter that came from Lacy.

"Are you kidding me? What kind of question is that?" Lacy was laughing so hard she couldn't breathe. The relief of a comfortable conversation washed over her and left her feeling brand new. She hadn't realized that what was so awful just a few hours ago could be lifted and shared between them. That talking to Daryl would be so much help.

"First of all nobody BECOMES a lesbian. You are or you aren't. Second of all I'm not a lesbian. I'm bisexual." Daryl's eyebrows were furrowed as he visibly tried to understand what Lacy was saying.

"So what's that mean? You like everyone?"

"Yeah, it means that gender isn't important" Lacy held a small smile at Daryl's childlike explanation. This was a hard thing to understand even for her and he is from Georgia. Georgia wasn't exactly known for teaching their kids progressive thinking. Daryl leaned back on his hands and used all his concentration to hold back a smile. He had some hope at least. In this life hope was important.

"Ya know it's kind a nice up here aint it" Daryl looked at his surroundings they were high up which gave him a good field of view. Being able to see what was coming before it came was always something that put him at ease.

"I have to ask you something." Lacy felt her heart race as she prepared to hear what Daryl would say.

"Yeah?" he looked at her from under his eye lashes chewing on his dirty finger nails absently.

"Do you think I'm crazy?" Daryl wasn't expecting that question. He sat up straight and thought for a moment. Lacy patiently waited his answer, she knew how Daryl worked. He would answer her when he felt he had the answer.

"I think this whole world is crazy. Some a the shit I seen since it all went to hell … If ya told me I was in a straight jacket locked up somewhere, that this was all in my head.. I might believe ya." Daryl wasn't sure if that had answered her question but he didn't know what else to say. He took a deep breath and looked up at the sky. Then out of the corner of his eye he saw movement. People from inside the prison running out into the fields in panic.

"Fuck!" Daryl yelled as he ran for the pipe and shimmied down. He ran back into the prison to find Rick and figure out what had everyone so worked up. His mind jumped to the worst possibilities first and he kept thinking to himself 'Who's dead?"'. Lacy continued to watch, it was the longest moment of her life. The panic that radiated from everyone was contagious. Here we go Lacy thought to herself as she turned back towards the pipe. She wasn't going to be any help from up here. It was time to go let off some steam. Whatever it was that went wrong had these people scared shitless. Lacy on the other hand had nothing to lose. She wouldn't be afraid, so she might as well help.


	10. Tainted

Lacy reached for the doors handle only to have it thrust open into her shoulder.

"Fuck!" Lacy cried out in pain. The man who ran past her had a name but Lacy couldn't have told you what it was. He was just one of the faceless people in this group. Lacy reminded herself that when you only know 30 people it shouldn't be so hard to remember all of their names. She continued into the hall and heard the unmistakable sound of walkers in the cell block. How did they get so far? How did they get in? The locks. The gates. It all seemed so safe. Lacy had her bow ready as she rounded the last corner to the c block.

She immediately shot down a walker who had a firm grasp on a woman's worn cotton shirt. The woman screamed helplessly as the walker bit into her just before the arrow hit. The walker slumped onto the stairs behind them and the woman fell to the ground pawing hysterically at the wound on her shoulder. Lacy quickly pulled out another arrow and looked away as she put the woman down. She didn't hesitate to ask her name or to comfort her. She knew it was all pointless the woman was dead as soon as the geek's teeth touched her. The commotion in the cell block seemed to be dyeing down but Lacy continued on looking for any more signs of danger and for Rick who was sure to be at the center of this chaos. As she began checking cells Lacy ran into Glenn coming the opposite way. He looked pale and fragile but his voice was steady.

"LACY! I'm glad to see your okay. There are walkers in the cell blocks."

"Yeah, I figured that one out for myself." Lacy replied sarcastically checking another cell with a ready weapon.

"I have to go find the group and make sure they are all safe, I was supposed to tell any stragglers to go back outside and wait for the coast to be clear." Glenn was clearly hesitating to kick Lacy out.

"I think I'll be more help here, Go do your job, I'll keep clearing cells" Lacy closed another cell behind her and turned to face Glenn. He nodded before jogging off in the direction she just came from. The dimly lit stone walls around her seemed so much more menacing without the sounds of its population. The blood here and there and the strewn bodies by the stairs left Lacy with a lump in her throat. It had been a very long time since anywhere had felt like home but this was the closest she had come. Lacy was trying desperately to figure out how a walker could have gotten in.

She was so consumed by her thoughts that she rounded a corner without checking it first and nearly bumped chests with a walker she recognized to be one of their own. She felt strong hands on her shoulders from behind. She was forcefully pulled into a cell and pressed against the cold damp wall. She heard the clanging of the bars as they were slammed behind her. Daryl had a handful of her shirt still tightly in his grasp with his forearm across her collarbones. She could feel the warmth of his body in stark contrast to the wall behind her. A chill ran down her spine causing Lacy to tremble. He pressed his arm against her forcefully holding her to the wall and making her chest hurt.

"Shh!" Daryl whispered aggressively in her ear. His warm breath wasn't helping her any. The confused walker had lost interest and started ambling away from the cell. Daryl quickly stepped out of the cell and shot it down before returning to Lacy.

"What are ya doin' Red? Yer gonna get yer self killed!"

"I can handle myself." Lacy said adjusting her shirt and rubbing her sore collar bones.

"Oh yeah? Then why did I just have ta save yer ass."

"Thanks Daryl. But no one asked you too." Lacy felt the bite of her words a moment too late and immediately regretted them. There was a shift in Daryl, his shoulders were stiff and he came towards Lacy as if he was going to hit her. Lacy's breath caught in her throat as she prepared herself for the impact of his punch. She pinched her eyes closed unable to watch the blow coming. Instead he punched the wall above her head sending a loud thud through the cell and leaned over her with furious eyes. His face was a mere inch away from hers as he challenged her with his eyes before turning with a grunt and leaving completely. Lacy's embarrassment over her carelessness had made her defensive. She yelled out as his footsteps disappeared.

"You missed!"

Lacy ran a hand over her face. Was that mature? Probably not but it was satisfying none the less. Readying her arrow once again Lacy continued on her sweep of the block. Her footsteps made a sound like a cats paws as she walked quickly and lightly on the hard cement. She felt her hair brushing against her back every time she turned. It was times like this that she missed the rubber band she had cut out of her hair when she had first arrived. She didn't want to be fighting a walker and get blindsided by her long hair. When she finally reached the end of the left side she found a few people gathered in the last cell. If her memory served correct this had been the cell of one of the teenage boys she had seen lurking about with Carl. It had seemed to her that they were always running off somewhere unsupervised. Rick stood alone, the only one inside the cell itself. No one was speaking and there was a long shadow cast over Rick's shoulders and face. His expression was unreadable in the dark. Outside the cell standing beside her were Herschel and Daryl and on the hard gray floor, now slick with dark blood, just inside the cells doorway was the uncomfortably small body of a walker. Lacy could never get used to the death of a child. Something felt broken inside her mind as she tried to reason what she was witnessing.

"So what happened?" Lacy asked quietly.

"Damn if I know. There's not a bite on 'em." Daryl's confusion seemed to have pushed their little tiff into the back of his mind. There were more important things happening now that had to be dealt with. There was a threat and no one was going to be able to rest until it was under control neither Daryl nor Lacy would be so dumb as to let an argument get anybody killed. Ricks impending voice came towards Lacy ominously as it echoed off the cells walls making it hard to know where it originated.

"Maybe he was sick and just… died."

If it weren't for the light cast on Rick's lower body she couldn't have told you where he was standing. Rick bent down now beside the boys head revealing his distressed face. There were strong lines of worry and fatigue all along his features. He carried a weight in his eyes that Lacy couldn't fathom. He took personally responsibility for every person in the prison and it was clear that this death was hard on him and its unusual circumstances only intensified that. He let his head hang and his eyes close. Herschel shifted his weight around using his crutch as he tried to approach Rick slowly with his bible clutched tightly to his chest. He rethought that and instead getting as close to Rick as he could without entering the cell.

"That seems to be the only explanation. That kind of thing still can happen. We were fortunate to go so long without any serious illness."

"So what does that mean? He was fine yesterday." Daryl's disbelief stemmed from the same place that Lacy's nausea came from. The body was so skinny, so fragile, and so young. Lacy watched Daryl look away with a flash of something in his eyes that he fought to hide. His tough exterior and walls of protection couldn't hold in the pain they all felt in the air. Rick spoke again suddenly with haste and purpose.

"We need to find out who he was with yesterday. See if there are any signs or symptoms that anyone can remember. We need to start quarantining anyone who is sick not just for our own protection but for there's. We don't want to start a panic these people are scared enough as it is. Herschel I'm going to ask you to get an official count on who we lost and notify the people closest to them. Daryl I need you to help me clean this mess up. All of us standing here have already been exposed and we can't risk exposing anyone new so it's up to us to try and put this place back together. Lacy I want you to wear a mask, a bandanna or something over your mouth and nose to protect the others from getting infected while you round up all the kids and secure them in the warden's offices and staff rooms over in the end of this wing. We want to keep them completely separated from us for as long as it takes to know this disease or virus is under control. Ask Beth to stay with them and tell her that once she closes the door behind her not to open it until I come to get them."

Rick made stern eye contact with Lacy. It was obvious he knew something was up between Beth and her, whether he had heard the juicy story or not wasn't important. He was forcing her to deal with it right then and there by giving her that particular job. Lacy felt her stomach flop over but she said nothing. She wasn't going to question Rick. She knew that anything he had asked of her was nothing compared to what he had already done for her. She met his still strong eyes again with a resigned respect. He nodded at her and she nodded back. Rick fought against the shake in his hands and the unbearable weight of his heart. The stone in his chest was hard for him to hide but he was determined to give the appearance of hope for his people. If they knew what he had become, that he had given up, then they might give up to. He didn't want that.

He didn't wish his pain on anyone. Daryl had figured it out a long time ago. He understood that part of Rick and admired him much more for it. The unspoken bond between them took root in their shared feeling of responsibility. In those moments of understanding a small comfort came to Rick. The knowledge that someone understood him without him having to explain was almost enough to make him feel truly happy at times. Lacy could feel the exchange between Rick and Daryl but had no idea what it meant. There bond was strong and Lacy felt slightly uncomfortable standing with these individuals who seemed to be the three strongest of the group in their own ways. She chose this moment to quietly slink away and brood in her mind over her unfavorable task.

Rick and Daryl watched Herschel leave to be sure his crutch didn't slip on the blood. Once he was safely on his way out of the prison they worked in silence for a long while rounding up the bodies and bring them to the foot of the stairs where two bodies already laid. Daryl looked closely at one particular body and whistled for Rick to come over.

"Look at that." Daryl said pointing to the arrow in her head.

"Lacy?" Rick asked looking at Daryl more often than the walker.

"Yeah, but look at her, she's bite but she aint turned." Daryl responded

"Lacy, put her down…" Rick said finally understanding, he continued with his forehead creased tightly.

"She didn't say anything about it; she did a really difficult thing. Not everyone here could have stepped up." Daryl nodded with his mouth pulled into a hard line. Lacy's words rung in his ears still 'you missed'. An incredible guilt spread through him. He had never intended to hurt her, never even considered laying a hand on her but he had made her think he would. He had taken it too far and lost control. Her rejection of his help had made him feel unimportant and worthless. The one thing of value that he provided was protection. If he could manage to do that, if he could keep these people alive then he might feel like he's worth something. Rick spoke again.

"I like your new apparel" Rick looked from Daryl to his wrist guard. Daryl just grunted in response.

"How did you get it?" He prompted again. Daryl sat back on the balls of his heels with his elbows draped over his knees that were in front of his chest.

"Traded Lacy a coyote pelt for it." Ricks lip twitched towards a smile at the idea of the barter system but the smirk didn't stick.

"Where'd she find a thing like that?" Rick didn't know where Lacy had come from exactly just that it wasn't this state. He was trying to imagine where she could have found such an odd thing.

"She made it." Daryl replied catching Rick's full attention.

"Well if that aint the sweetest thing I've heard all week I don't know what is." Rick poked at Daryl.

"Shut up" Daryl spit back with much less venom then he had intended.

"Ya know Laurie made me a scrap book once. I think it was my favorite gift she ever gave me because it was so… her. It was from her heart but I guess all art is from the heart. I don't know really, I was never very good at it."

"It's not the same thing." Daryl responded becoming a little annoyed. When Rick said nothing Daryl continued.

"She made me this because she wanted the Coyote pelt, that's all. Aint nothin' cutesy about it."

"If you say so" Rick replied with his hands up in surrender.

"Just one last thing though." Rick started.

"If today is going to make you think about anything, think about how short life is and ask yourself if being too scared to speak up is worth never knowing the answer." Rick didn't say what he was referring to but they both knew he meant Daryl's growing affection for Lacy. Daryl's face felt hot and he grew angry with embarrassment. He himself hadn't even decided how he felt yet and Rick was standing there and talking like it was already too late. Like his mind was made up for him. Daryl was done chatting and the conversation halted entirely for the rest of the time they spent cleaning up the cell block.

Lacy caught glimpses of the women she had put down earlier. Sometimes in the corner of her eye she thought she saw her standing nearby. She kept her eyes forward now to avoid those sightings; she couldn't deal with that right now. It wasn't the first time she had to do something like that but it was the first time she had to do it without having time to cope. Lacy was wandering around the front court yard looking for Beth. Lacy figured it would be best to sort out their situation first and then round up the kids together. She spotted Beth holding Judith and talking to Maggie a few feet ahead. When the girls noticed her approach Maggie quickly disappeared. Beth walked right up to Lacy with vigor. Beth disregarded the bandanna Lacy wore tied over the over half of her face.

"Where were you?" Beth demanded bouncing Judith a little to fast. Lacy couldn't meet her eyes.

"I had to sort something's out. I'm sorry."Lacy felt the fabric heavily against her face as it grew moist from her speech. It was difficult to breath freely in the Georgia air with it on. Beth shook her head making the curls that framed her face bounce.

"You can't do that. You can't just leave." Beth's voiced seemed too small to be so strong.

"I know. I just, I didn't know what else to do. I thought if I was away at least I couldn't cause any more trouble." This wasn't the way Lacy planned to have this conversation. She felt so little in Beth's eyes like a child caught misbehaving. Her mind flickered to Maggie and wondered what she thought of this. Thre was no doubt Beth had talked to her about it.

"I was looking for you and when this all started happening I didn't know if you were alive. I didn't know if you knew what was going on. You could have been trapped and alone and no one would have known where to find you. I kept waiting for you to come out of the prison or show up in this field." Beth's concern only made Lacy feel guiltier. She didn't think she deserved to be cared about right now. She had hurt Beth and she had upset Daryl. She seemed to be worsening every situation and alienating herself from the only people she had.

"I was helping clear out the cell block and pissing Daryl off. I'm pretty good at that." Lacy was counting the blades of grass growing from a crack in the asphalt of the driveway.

"Look at me!" Beth nearly shouted. Lacy met Beth's piercing blue stare now and Beth continued on.

"I know you're embarrassed. I'm embarrassed too. You have to stop this; you can't pretend you don't care about us. Just because your new here doesn't mean you aren't one of us. It doesn't mean we don't love you too. Don't push us away because you're too scared to lose us." Beth glared at Lacy and waited for a response. Lacy didn't know what to say. Beth was right. She could see through Lacy completely.

"I'm sorry." Lacy repeated. She couldn't find anything else inside herself to give. She wanted Beth to forgive her but she didn't know what Beth was looking for. Beth sighed heavily rocking Judith more gently now. The child was fast asleep luckily.

"None of it matters anymore, I'm just glad you're okay. We need you now more than ever, you're strong Lacy you just don't see it yet." Lacy didn't feel strong so she brushed the comment off and changed the topic to more pressing matters. A certain feeling of resolution had been achieved and there was a lot to do still.

"Rick wants you and me to take all the kids to the Wardens office and quarantine them all until this blows over."

"Quarantine?" Beth asked with her eyebrows pulled together. She looked now at the red fabric over Lacy's mouth seemingly connecting the dots.

"Your dad thinks that a virus killed one of our own. That's how this all started. He turned and then bit some people. No one expected a threat from the inside. We weren't have to keep all the kids away from the rest of us until we know who is sick and have this all under control. He also asked that you stay in there with them. To take care of them I guess. He doesn't want you to open the doors for anyone but him." Beth listened intently and stayed quiet for a long while.

"Alright." She said finally. Lacy and Beth began walking together towards Carl motioning for him to come meet them. Lacy wasn't even sure how many kids there were here or how long it would take to find them all but they had to work quickly so that Lacy could go back to Rick to help sort this all out before nightfall.

With C-block livable again Daryl made his way out into the far field with his black bandanna tied around his face. He was alone finally, as he dug graves for his friends yet again. There were others buried out in this field. Daryl looked over at them as he caught his breath. He whipped the sweat off his forehead and began digging again. It wasn't worth mourning them all again. All the weeds in the field had strong roots and made it difficult to dig but it had to be done before nightfall. So much had to be done before nightfall these days. Without electricity it was impossible to do much of anything at night, besides that it just wasn't safe.

Daryl didn't want to think about the people he was digging for. He didn't want to think about their bodies waiting to be buried. Instead he found himself thinking about Lacy and what Rick had said. Was it really worth never knowing? Daryl knew that they were all living on borrowed time. Everyday could be their last but he just wasn't a seize the moment guy. He didn't know how to stop over thinking it all and let his guard down. He spent so many years building that guard up talking it down seemed like an invitation for pain. He remembered her face earlier when he had pulled her into the cell.

How could he try and explain to her what he felt if he kept behaving like that? How could he explain it to her if he didn't even understand it? It seemed so ridiculous to him to be worrying about this but he couldn't get her out of his mind. The way she walked and the spark in her eyes. She radiated an inviting air that drew people to her without seeming to want it. She was like Rick in that way. He threw aside more dark soil as the hole he stood in grew larger. She was a lone wolf like him a pack animal that didn't fit. She wasn't like anyone he had ever known before the outbreak.

It was strange how this new world brought out these odd and strong people. Everyone in the group was a survivor. No matter how weak they may seem or feel every one of them was a survivor. Daryl had a feeling that like him, Lacy had been a survivor long before the outbreak. Both of them had already been tainted when things turned bad. They were better off never having as much to lose in the first place. He made up his mind to go talk to her when he finished here if there was anything he didn't want to lose in his whole life it was the people he had found refused to think about it any further lest he talk himself out of it or consider her rejection and the impending loss it would mean. This was the last hole he had to dig and he was feeling the ache in his spine and neck with every stab of the shovel. If he didn't collapse before he got to talk to her tonight he would be surprised.


	11. Gentleness

"Drowning in a sea of darkness

Trying just to swim

Spinning and directionless

Won't let myself give in

There has to be some solution

In desperate need of air

Grasping at a resolution lost in my despair

Panicking, I have to do this

How do I know what's right

I look to God and pray to Jesus

That I made a worth fight

I shed a tear but no one sees it

Without an ounce of light

Is there a way that I can make it?

Oh Jesus hold me tight"

Lacy furiously scribbled inside the journal Daryl had given here yesterday. She let her mind drift back to her nightmare the one that had caused all her troubles of late. She thought of the religious aspects of Beth and envied her faith after being given so much proof that if there was a god, he sure as hell doesn't care about them. She knew the only way she could move on was to let it all out on paper like she had been taught by her counselors back in the day.

Lacy closed the book tucking the pen she used inside as she did. The movement in the corner of her eye brought her back from her minds corridors quickly. Rick stood before her looking weathered and tired. He had been out in the fields farming all morning. Despite all that was still unfolding in the aftermath of yesterday's tragedies he still had duties to attend to. He held out an arrow to her. Lacy looked at it confused. She wondered how he had gotten it.

"I know what you had to do." Rick said to her mysteriously, still holding out her arrow. The woman's face came back to Lacy now. Her dark hair matting under the blood that poured from her shoulder. The pain on her face before Lacy had put her out of her misery. Lacy silently took the arrow from Rick. She hadn't intended to tell anyone about that. She thought it was better they think of her as another victim of the walkers then of one of their own. She wasn't sure how everyone would react knowing what Lacy had done. Lacy waited to hear what Rick had to say

"I know it must have been hard to do and I just wanted to say thank you for stepping up and taking care of what was necessary. For being hear for the group. We need strong people. People like you. It's hard for us all here, everyday is harder. And your one of us now. You've proven to me, to all of us that you can be trusted." Rick sighed heavily before continuing.

"We all carry burdens, pains, traumas. It's a heavy weight to carry but you don't have to do it alone. I understand what you're going through, Daryl understands, Carol, Glenn, Tyreese, Herschel. Everyone here knows what it's like to be where you are. You might not be ready right now but you can talk to us. You can be part of this family." Rick looked at Lacy for some sign of understanding. He wanted her to feel valuable and appreciated. Lacy reeled in the emotions she was feeling. She wasn't expecting when she joined this group to feel the way she did now. She didn't know that people like this still existed out there. The bandits and crook and evil men she had encountered up until now had taught her otherwise but she had found this group of good loving people and they had accepted her. Lacy rubbed her eyelids with her thumbs.

"Thank you Rick, I had to do some awful things on the road. I met some bad people. I didn't know men like you still existed. I just haven't adjusted yet." Rick nodded his head accepting that as enough of an answer. Lacy had been keeping her distance all day, it's what had lead Rick to come and speak to her in the first place. Now Lacy took the opportunity to get some information about the status of the prison.

"How is everyone holding up?"

"They've been better." Rick answered softly.

"We have two people who are sick, Karen and David. It seems that coughing and fatigue are the warning signs." Lacy listened closely picturing Tyreese's girlfriend Karen in her mind. Karen was sweet the few times Lacy had directly interacted with her had been pleasant enough. Lacy rested her head on her hand before asking almost like a child.

"Are they going to die too?" Rick had a bandana that he continually wrapped and unwrapped around his hand. He looked around the area before exhaling and answering.

"I don't know, Herschel and Bob are looking through the books they have and going through all of our medical supplies deciding how best to try and help them. We don't know yet if you CAN get better once you've got it. Karen and David are on bed rest and are off in a separate area of the prison."

"Fuck man" Lacy replied playing with the arrow she still held.

"Have you seen Daryl today?" Rick asked Lacy.

"No, not since I saw you all at the cell yesterday. Why?" Rick stood up straight preparing to leave.

"I just thought he would be with you, I haven't seen him all day." Lacy shook her head. She had no idea where he was or why Rick thought he would be with her. The last time they had spoke hadn't gone so well.

"I honestly just thought he was avoiding me. We had a bit of a disagreement yesterday." Lacy remembered his kindness on the roof as she looked at her journal in her lap. Then she remembered her let scuff with him in the cell block all because he was trying to protect her. She kicked herself again.

"Daryl's a stubborn one. He has a good heart he just doesn't know it." Rick saw a lot of similarities in Lacy and Daryl he saw how she wandered off alone. How she held everything in and kept quietly to herself most of the time. He also saw how she continued to bring her A game at the first hint of trouble. He saw how she survived. Lacy chuckled a little.

"I don't know what he is; I've never met a man like him." Lacy didn't mean for that to sound as wistful as it came out. She blushed a little when her own voice reached her ears

.

"If there's one thing I can say about Daryl it's that he is fiercely loyal. He is reliable in that sense. When he cares about someone he will care about them until the day he dies. " Rick didn't say anymore he just turned and walked back in the direction he had come from. Lacy watched his figure grow smaller with distance as she mulled over that thought. What had Rick meant? She tucked her arrow back into the quiver with the rest of them momentarily scolding herself for not retrieving it in the first place. Lacy thought for a moment about where Daryl could go that would be hidden from Rick. Then it occurred to her that she knew exactly where he was.

Lacy stood outside now looking up at the ledge of the roof. The pipe she needed to climb was to her left and she whistled three notes. There was no answer. She looked again at the chipping paint on the pipe and wondered for a moment if she had been wrong in thinking he would come back here to hide. Lacy decided to trust her gut and call out to him.

"What's it going to be Redneck? Are you coming down or am I Coming up?" Lacy remembered what Daryl had said to her when they had been in reversed roles. She waited for another moment recalling her own silence the day before. It was a strange sort of déjà vu she felt. Smirking a little she aimed her bow upwards picturing in her mind where she had been sitting the day before then aiming a foot or so to the right. She let her arrow sore through the air and tinker as it landed on the solid rock of the roof.

"Was I close?" Lacy did her best Daryl impression as her smile grew a little bigger.

"Ya aim like a girl." That was the only response that drifted down to her ears. Lacy began her climb up to the roof top feeling flakes of blue gray paint falling off the rusted metal to the ground below. Lacy saw Daryl sitting with his elbows on his knees slowly turning her arrow between his fingers.

"Ricks been looking for you, He thought I'd know where you were. I didn't realize that I knew until after I talked to him."

"So he don't know I'm up here?" Lacy shook her head no in response. Daryl grunted approval looking down at the roof top surface. They waited a moment in silence.

"So why are you up here?" Lacy decided to ask right off the bat.

"Just needed some space, didn't want ta go too far, case yall had any casualties needed tendin'." Lacy knew Daryl had been designated grave digger. She hadn't known though that is seemed to bother him. That sort of a task would be enough to break anyone's spirits but someone like Daryl seemed the type to brush it off. Lacy wasn't sure what to say to that so she just looked out over the field and the yellowish green grass to the fresh dirt graves marked only with wooden crosses. It was a while before ether of them said anything else. Lacy wasn't sure why she didn't leave she stayed though and after a while Daryl spoke again.

"How come yer always hanging around me?" Daryl's question was blunt and harsh sounding but when Lacy looked at his face she saw something vulnerable. Daryl's interest in spending time with Lacy had long surpassed carrying out Ricks orders. There was no point pretending that he wasn't making the decision all on his own to be with her whenever possible. She made him feel comfortable, relaxed. He knew she could take care of herself and he knew he could take care of himself so when they were together there wasn't as much worrying involved. Lacy pondered for a moment before deciding how to respond to Daryl's question. Her blood was pumping hard as she cleared her throat.

"Well, I like your company." She stated simply.

"Why?" He asked flatly again his icy blue eyes boring into her from a dark and dirt smeared face.

"I don't know why, maybe it's because you're quiet like me. You don't stress me out." Lacy rolled her dry tongue around in her mouth. She was growing nervous now. 'maybe he does stress you out' Lacy thought but she knew that wasn't true. She kind of liked the butterflies and nervousness she sometimes felt with him. It wasn't the same kind of stress she felt talking to the others. The sun was brighter today then the day before which seemed impossible. Lacy wondered how plants could grow here without baking to crisps by noon each day. The heat felt like waves rolling off of her body. A bead of sweat rolled down Lacys neck and she didn't bother to wipe it away.

"I was never gonna hurt ya, ya know?" Daryl's voice was very soft now, almost too soft to hear. Lacy recalled the moment when she had squeezed her eyes closed. When she was certain he would throw a solid punch at her.

"I was asking for it anyhow." Lacy brushed off his comment.

"No ya weren't." Daryl's voice was stronger as he sat up straight and looked her dead in the eyes.

"Don't say that. Aint no man that ever mounted to anythin' hit his woman. I was mad but I would a never hurt ya." Neither of them acknowledged the phrase 'his woman' when Daryl had been talking about her. Lacy heard it and her heart had skipped a beat but she immediately shut it down telling herself it was just a mistake. She told herself he hadn't meant to compare her to a girlfriend.

"I was just embarrassed that I had needed your help, but I did need it and I'm glad you were there."Daryl looked like he wanted to say something but neither of them said anything for another long moment. Daryl's mind was spinning in circles he was praying passionately that she hadn't noticed what he had said to her last. He wasn't ready to tell her how he felt but he had almost let it slip just then. She hadn't commented but he couldn't know for sure what was going on in her head. Daryl remembered again what Rick had said to him. Was it worth never knowing? Daryl sighed and flopped backwards onto the roof top. He was laying flat and keeping his eyes closed from the blinding light directly over head. He draped on arm over his eyes heavily. He didn't know how to do this. He barely knew before the world changed in this new setting anything was possible. How do you go about explaining to someone that you have feelings for them when you've only just met them? He chastised himself, things happened to quickly in this world for his tastes. You got thrown into a couple of bad situations and you find out really quickly who's got your back.

Next to him he heard the sounds of Lacy lowering herself down so she too was facing the sky. Looking at the world from that perspective was unusual. She spent so much time looking around her for threats that she hardly ever had a chance to lie down and face the sky these days. There was nothing in the sky that showed what had happened to the earth. No sign that so much had changed. This could have been the very same sky over a family party or a first date. Lacy took a deep breath in and focus on the feeling of the sun's heat on her skin. Lacy heard movement so she shielded her eyes with her hand and opened them to see what was going on around her. Daryl was sitting up now looking at her with a scowl that bore into her with a force. Lacy quickly and awkwardly sat up as well confused about the sudden shift in his mannerisms. Only a moment ago he had seemed fine.

"Why do you like Beth?" Daryl asked out of the blue.

"What? I don't know she's just kind. She has something that most the rest of us don't anymore. Gentleness." Lacy felt cornered. She didn't think she needed to explain herself to him.

"What good's bein' gentle? Aint nobody bein' gentle on me." Daryl countered Lacy.

"That's why it's so endearing; it's much harder and beauteous to remain gentle when all you know is violence." Daryl didn't have a response for that. He waited a moment stricken by the words Lacy used. He wondered briefly if she had written in the journal yet and if she would ever read anything she had written to him. Lacy spoke again.

"You should probably go make sure what Rick needs isn't important." Lacy's tone said that she was no longer going to talk about Beth with him. She was uncomfortable with his aggression about it. She wasn't sure what he thought of her since finding out about Beth. He certainly didn't seem to like it Lacy just wasn't sure why. Daryl shoved off the ground quickly with a grunt and was over the ledge climbing down the pipe in a short moment. He suddenly wanted to be far away from Lacy and very distracted. Both of those things could be provided by Rick. Entering the prison and having to adjust to the darkness inside Daryl blinked rapidly at the spots of brightness in his vision. He was certain that there was something to do to help out. All Daryl wanted to avoid was getting stuck taking care of the sick people. That was just something he knew he wouldn't be good at it. Daryl was in the prison now walking towards where Rick slept. He had left Lacy behind without a word and now he wondered whether she was still on the roof or not. Luckily Rick was sitting in his cell when Daryl approached. Daryl involuntarily checked Rick's appearance for signs of being sick before speaking to him.

"Hey" Daryl said in a deep scruffy rasp.

"Finally decided to show your face?" Rick asks with a slight jab at Daryl for his absence.

"Needed to clear my head" Daryl explained with conflict still in his chest.

"I wanted to talk to you about going out on a run for medical supplies. More people are begging to appear sick. We won't be able to stop this from killing all of us unless we get some more medicine and quick. Herschel says there's a veterinarian's college a little ways a way that has things we can use. It's our best bet and other people might not have thought to loot it." Daryl listened closely Rick was leaning close to him as he talked urgently detailing what he expected the trip to be like. He said it would take maybe two days to get there and back.

"So ya want me ta go? Who else?" Daryl asked with curiosity.

"You decide." Rick handed off the decision making power whenever possible. Daryl left cell now shouting over his shoulder

"Try not to die 'fore I get back."

Daryl hand rounded up a group to go with him to the college. A damn good group in his had decided on bringing Michonne, who seemed to be back at the prison for good now and was about as useful as a Swiss army knife when it came to surviving, she could do it all. Tyreese, who was passionate about helping everyone who was sick including his girlfriend Karen. Bob, the only person among them who would be able to tell the difference between helpful medicine and useless junk. Bob would be the one to make sure they loaded up all of their bags with only things they could use now or in the future. There was no use carrying back a bunch of viles that the college had used to euthanize animals and it would only take up space that could be used by something more valuable. There was only one person left that Daryl really wanted to bring along. He quickly trotted around the fields outside assuming that he would find Lacy there. When he didn't he quickly looked for Beth remembering a moment later that she was locked up in the prison with all the rug rats.

"Eh! Maggie!" Daryl shouted as soon as he spotted her up ahead talking to Glenn before going on to daytime watch duty. Daryl thought for a moment about how he always seemed to end up on night watch, rarely did he get a day shift. Maggie looked over her shoulder to see Daryl quickly trotting up to her and Glenn. She greeted him with a small smile.

"Xena, ya seen Red around anywhere?" Maggie smiled slightly at the warrior nickname. She didn't feel like a warrior, she felt helpless with this new threat in their home. She cleared her throat from the emotions that where creeping up.

"I saw her not that long ago eating in the cafeteria." There was a look of slight disapproval in Maggie's eyes but she didn't say anything to explain it. She lovingly squeezed Glenn's hand before looking between him and Daryl and then departing silently.

"She alright?" Daryl asked still watching Maggie leave.

"Yeah, she's just worried about her dad." Glenn was looking pale and tired. Daryl sized him up before saying.

"You should take a nap or somethin' ya look like shit." Glenn chuckled a little and touched fists with Daryl.

"Nah, man there's too much to do." He retreated now and Daryl was back onto his mission of finding Lacy so he could get going on this run as soon as possible. Reentering the prison Daryl spotted a heated conversation between Tyreese and Rick who were hurriedly walking in the direction of Karen and David. Daryl's stomach dropped and he quickly darted to catch up to them. Tyrees needed to come with him anyway so whatever this issue was it needed to be sorted out quickly. Daryl only caught up to them now receiving a nod from Rick as he did so. All three men burst into the light of day out a door Daryl had never really used before. The smell of burning flesh hit his nose and instantly made him want to vomit. In front of them on the ground laid two smoldering bodies clearly those of David and Karen. Daryl lifted a hand to cover his mouth and nose, the air out here was putrid and the beating sun had only worsened the smell. Daryl and Rick were momentarily without words while Tyreese was shaking with anger.

"Who did this!? Who murdered them!?" He demanded answers as his mind visibly tried to reason what he had discovered.

"Somebody dragged them out here and burned them like trash!"He yelled when nether Rick nor Daryl had answered his first questions. Rick laid a hand on Tyreese's shoulder.

"Calm down, we can figure this out." Tyreese turned quickly getting into Ricks face their noses nearly touching. Tyreese had to bend down a bit to do so, He was taller than Rick by at least a few inches.

"We need to find who did this! I won't sleep until we do." Tyreese was looming over Rick aggressively. Daryl put a hand on Tyreese's shoulder trying to draw him back a bit before things escalated any further. Tyreese over flowed with anger and shoved Daryl into the stone wall behind him. Daryl's back throbbed slightly at the impact his spine made with the rough stones behind him. Daryl put a hand up when Rick came to his aid still pinned between Tyreese and the wall. Daryl wasn't going to fight back unless he had too. He knew how much pain Tyreese was feeling if he needed to let off some steam shove some people around then alright he could handle that. He heard Rick from behind Tyreese's heaving chest.

"Come on Tyreese, Karen wouldn't want you being like this." In a flash Daryl was freed from the wall and Rick was on the ground. Tyreese had thrown a hard right hook drawing blood immediately. Rick didn't want to fight just like Daryl didn't want to fight but Tyreese threw another hard punch then something changed. Rick became something Daryl had never seen before. He was an animal, Tyreese was much bigger than him but with every punch Rick took Tyreese down. Quickly the tables turned and what was once the group trying to calm Tyreese became Daryl trying to keep Rick from killing Tyreese.

"RICK!" Daryl yelled edging around the skirt of the fight. Daryl needed to get though to him. Tyreese was on the ground now; Rick had a hand on his shirt and was repeatedly punching him in the face.

"RICK!" Daryl tried again sweeping in to pull Rick off of Tyreese who was blubbering and bleeding on the ground. Ricks hand was visibly injured from the force of the punches he had been throwing. Ricks labored breathing and the soft sobs of Tyreese were the only noises around them. Daryl momentarily wondered if he could even bring Tyreese with him on the run or if he would be too injured to be of any help. Shoving Rick back into the prison Daryl decided not to let these two men near each other at the moment. Rick quickly retreated to tend to his mangled hand and bloody nose. Daryl thought about going back outside to help Tyreese but he decided against it. Tyreese had been out of control. Daryl might not have handled the situation the way Rick did but he was going to back Rick up no matter what.

Tyreese could lie out there for a while. Daryl hoped he would think twice about laying a hand on Rick or anyone else at camp again. Fighting among themselves would only get them all killed quicker. Daryl sighed heavily his mind was still trying to figure out who could have murdered Karen and David and why. Daryl thought he knew why. To stop the infection from spreading to the rest of the camp. It was too late though. Sasha was sick now and so was an older man who had come from Woodbury. Daryl quickly decided that someone needed to protect the sick from the healthy just as much as the healthy needed to be protected from the sick. It seemed Daryl wouldn't be leaving on this run just yet. Now he had to establish a guard, find Lacy and find out if Tyreese was physically and emotionally capable of coming along. 'Why does everything always have to be so complicated' Daryl thought to himself. He had just wanted the chance to ride his bike again when they went on this run. 'Find Lacy' he thought to himself. He reasoned that she could help him set up the guard but something in his gut told him he just needed to see her right now. He needed her to get the image of the charred bodies out of his mind. As he walked another empty hallway Daryl realized more than anything he just didn't want to be alone right now. That was new to him, it was different, it was scary.


	12. Mold and Rocks

Lacy had returned to the roof after grabbing a bite to eat. It had seemed like she hadn't eaten in days though she was certain she had. It was oddly still on the roof after her strange chat up there with Daryl she spent a while thinking about his odd mood swings before giving up her attempts to understand him. She was finally reentering the building momentarily blinded by the drastic change in light when she was immediately grabbed by Daryl.

"Fuck! What?" Lacy asked leaning away out of surprise as both her biceps were tightly grasped with in Daryl's strong and coarse hands. He immediately let go and stepped back giving her space after he spooked her. He had only grabbed her to keep her from walking directly into him since clearly she hadn't seen him.

"Sorry, Shit hit the fan." Daryl made a roundabout gesture at eye height his deep and gruff voice sounding lower than usual.

"What is it now?" Lacy asked as Daryl paced furiously in front of her. How could things have possibly gotten any worse? Lacy bit down on the bitter feeling that rose inside her, reminding herself she was lucky to be with these people no matter what hardships they faced. Daryl rubbed the back of his head with one hand words didn't ever come easily to him.

"Karen and David, They're dead. Tyreese freaked, Rick kicked his ass. It's a mess." Daryl swung his arm loosely at the last part of his statement like he often did when he spoke with passion.

"Wait back up, Karen and David, when did they die? Did they turn?" Lacy was trying to get a grasp on the situation Daryl had thrown it all at her too quickly. If Karen and David had died then maybe Rick was right, maybe you really couldn't get better from this. Once you had it you were done. At least without the kind of care you might have had once upon a suburb.

"Nah, they didn't get the chance, someone burned em." Daryl's shoulders sagged and he leaned against the wall behind him. He rested a foot on the wall looking at lacy from under the shadow of his unkempt hair. Lacy was silent for a long moment rolling around his words in her head. There was a piece of her that knew what happened to them was wrong but another more dominant piece wasn't surprised at all. She was jarred by her own lack of humanity. Daryl watched her for a response wanting to gauge his own against hers. He often found himself looking to others for a reaction before feeling safe in his own.

"Aw man." Lacy hadn't thought that anyone in this group was capable of something like that. She didn't think she was even capable of it herself though she wasn't sufficiently uncomfortable with it. She had no idea how the group would handle somebody who operated completely on their own in that way. What do you do with somebody like that? There were no courts, hell there were no laws, just vague outlines of rules that never lasted.

"Do we know why?" Lacy asked looking back at Daryl again.

"Nah, I think it was ta stop the spread. Didn't work though, Sasha's sick, some others too." Lacy shook her head and sighed.

"Tyreese, he freaked over Karen, what happened with Rick?"

"Tyreese was hurtin' he was real pissed, Think he wanted ta be hit. Started a fight with Rick and got his ass whooped."

"Is he okay?" Lacy knew very little about Rick's background except that he was a cop once and his wife had died giving birth to Judith. He was also the one person that truly scared Lacy, she desired his affection in the way that one would desire a father's affection but at the same time there was something in his eyes a spark. It was one she had and one Daryl had. It was a spark of someone who would do whatever it took, who would kill to protect themselves or the lives they valued.

"Dunno." Daryl's eyes burned into Lacy in the dark hallway. There was a heavy silence around them. Daryl wrinkled his nose.

"What should we do?" Lacy asked quietly. Daryl looked troubled he tucked his hands into his armpits.

"I can't get that smell outta ma head." He didn't meet her eyes anymore keeping his nose wrinkled and his eyebrows pulled down. Lacy realized now that Daryl was reaching out to her. He may have been looking for help in this situation but he was looking for something else too. Daryl didn't want to be in charge. Rick had run off and things still needed to be handled. Lacy stepped forward closing the space between her and Daryl.

"Take a deep breath. What does it smell like in here right now?"

"I dunno." Daryl mumbled.

"Did you even try?" Lacy asked impatiently. Daryl sighed and took a deep breath.

"Smells like mold and rocks." Lacy chuckled a little. He hadn't brought his eyes up yet Lacy waited studying him closely in their seemingly intimate hallway.

"Good. Did you ever wear cologne?" Daryl looked embarrassed fidgeting at the personal inquiry.

"Sometimes." He mumbled again.

"Think about what that smelt like. You don't have to tell me just try and remember." Daryl's face softened a little. His lips twitched towards a smile.

"Smelled pretty awful actually."

"Well then you're hopeless." Lacy threw her hands up in defeat. Daryl stood tall again seeming to regain his composure slightly. He looked at the woman before him with a strange pride. She was smart, she wasn't to be toyed with. She was something worth having. Daryl caught himself feeling possessive again and decided to move on to a new thought completely.

"I was thinkin' we need to set up a guard for the sick folk." Daryl sounded unsure of himself.

"That's a good idea." Lacy nodded encouragingly.

"I'm supposed to be goin' out on a med's run with some people soon. Thought you might like to get outta here for a bit." Lacy was thrilled at the idea of leaving the prison with Daryl.

"I'll go but first let's sort things out here. I wouldn't be comfortable going with everything all out of order here." Daryl nodded but didn't say anything further he began walking back towards the cell blocks. Lacy hung back a bit taking a moment to drink in Daryl's features. The vulnerability he had showed her a moment ago had sent her heart in to flutters. It was hard to believe that Daryl ever opened up to anybody more shocking was the idea that he would chose her to confide in. Lacy reminded herself that Rick had been otherwise occupied. She was obviously a second choice but a smile crept onto her face none the less. She was beginning to really feel a tie to the group through Daryl. She thought for a moment that maybe getting closer to some of the other people in the prison might not be so bad after all. She trailed her eyes over Daryl's strong shoulders as he led the way. His sleeveless button up hung loosely around his small waist. Lacy felt a strange desire hit her hard in the gut she immediately scolded herself focusing on the echo of their shows in the hall as a distraction. They walked for a while longer until the familiar metal bars of block c came into view. A thought came to Lacy as she reached the entrance where Daryl waited holding open the door.

"Thanks" She said walking a little faster than comfortable to save Daryl from waiting for her.

"Hey, I'm just going to go say goodbye to Beth while you set up that guard. Come get me if you need help." Daryl felt bad for Beth who was cooped up with all the rug rats so he accepted the task on his own and gave Lacy a nod goodbye.

Lacy knocked on the large wooden door below a golden plate that read Wardens office.

"Hello?" A soft familiar voice called from behind the heavy door. Lacy didn't try the handle she knew it was locked. She looked at the handle for a long while though wishing that she could will it open. She hadn't seen Beth in what felt like an incredible amount of time.

"It's me." Lacy replied leaning her head against the door.

"Lacy?" Beth asked unsure.

"Yeah" Lacy replied. She slowly traced the patterns of the wood with her finger tips while she thought.

"I'm going to be going out on a run so I just wanted to come say goodbye and let you know I won't be visiting for a little bit."

"How long do we have right now?" Beth asked after a moment.

"I don't know, a little bit." Lacy waited the conversation was turning out to be harder than she thought.

"How are the kids?" Lacy asked after the pause began to feel unbearable.

"They are mad that Carl's not in here with them. They also are getting more scarred every day. I'm reading to them though and singing for them. I think it's helping." Lacy smiled to herself at the thought of Beth singing.

"I've never heard you sing."

"You will." Beth replied in a peculiar tone. Lacy wondered what songs Beth had listened too before.

"Where are you going to go on the run?" Beth asked now.

"I don't know actually. Daryl asked me to go with him on a meds run. I didn't really ask any questions I just said yes."

"That sounds about right." Beth said with humor in her voice.

"What's that supposed to mean" Lacy asked with mock-rage.

"Lacy, I know you think you have feelings for me or did or whatever but you act different around Daryl then you do with anyone else. You talk so much more, you actually look relaxed. I don't think you even know its happening but I see it all the time. So I guess I'm just not surprised that you didn't ask questions." Lacy wasn't sure how to respond to Beth. Then she decided to take a chance. Maybe if she said it out loud it would feel real.

"I…. Really think I need him sometimes... He's just… different."

"I'm glad you're finally realizing it now. You can't take things for granted anymore. You'll lose them to quick." Lacy knew Beth was right she turned and lowered herself with her back to the door leaning her head back. Neither of them said anything for a while.

"Beth?"

"Yeah?"

"Will you sing to me please?" Beth's voice was soft and muffled by the door but it chimed in a soprano that made Lacy think of the fields outside. Lacy closed her eyes and let herself get lost in the sound of Beth's voice. Lacy felt like she was inside a snow globe. She was surrounded by a glittery delightful snippet of a story fabricated by Beth's voice and as her voice faded out Lacy felt a sudden sense of loss. She was relieved when Beth sang a second song without being prompted. By the end of the second song Daryl had come looking for Lacy. As Daryl approached he saw Lacy sitting against the door with her eyes closed and heard the soft musical sounds from the other side of the door he didn't want to sneak up on them it just felt weird so he cleared his throat quickly. Lacy shot up to her feet quickly her eyes wide. Lacy and Daryl locked eyes and she knew without him having to speak that it was time to get ready to go out.

"Ah, Beth?"

"Yeah, Lace?"

"I got to go now. I'll be back soon okay? I'll come and tell you about the trip."

"Okay… be safe." Beth's footsteps faded away from the door and Lacey waited a moment longer before lifting her head again and looking at Daryl who waited patiently and quietly by her side.

"You okay?" Daryl's southern rasp always surprised Lacy just a little. It seemed impossible for that deep of a voice to come out of his body and yet she couldn't picture him with anything else.

"Yea- yes. Im good." Lacy pushed the heaviness in her heart away and squared her shoulders.

"Then it's time ta go." Daryl stated.

Lacy grabbed another bag to load into the car and almost walked into Bob who looked a little out of place.

"Are you sure you need me to come with you?" Bob asked nervously looking back at the prison both hands tucked into the straps on his back pack.

"How do you pronounce this?" Daryl asked pointing to a piece of paper he held in his hand. Bob responded with the name of a medicine Lacy had never heard of.

"Yup, we need ya." Daryl said slapping a hand on Bobs shoulder before continuing his preparations. Daryl was beginning to feel excited about the chance to leave the prison. He had the desire to stretch his legs more and more in the last few days. They were just about ready to head out. Tyreese was coming along with them though his eye was badly swollen and his mood was still very unreliable. Daryl and Lacy had agreed it was better to bring him along. Leaving him behind would only make them both more nervous about the situation at the prison. It had taken some convincing to get him to leave Sasha but they had explained to him the importance of getting the medicine. With a mission to focus on Tyreese seemed to be handling himself a little better. The group began to pile into their car as Daryl pulled his bike to the front. Lacy was about to get into the van when she heard Daryl's now familiar three note whistle. She looked over her shoulder and saw him motion for her to come over.

"Yeah?" Lacy asked walking over slowly. Daryl's eyes wandered over her for a moment before nodding to her to get on the back of his bike. Lacy paused for a moment caught off guard. No one ever rode on his bike with him at least not since she had been there. Lacy looked over the black motorcycle timidly. It was the kind of bike bad boys drove in movies. A thrill and wave of honor crashed over her as she climbed onto the motorcycle unsure of what to do with her hands.

"Better hold on, Red." Daryl's southern growl reached her ears over the roar of the engine. She managed to get a grip around his waist just before he sped forward towards the gate. Lacy could feel Daryl's muscles through his shirt and had to focus on balancing to keep her mind from wandering. It was exhilarating feeling the Georgia air whip through her hair. The car followed them out of the gates and onto the road. Lacy was feeling a little worn out every bump the bike hit made her muscles ache. Ultimately though she was much happier on the bike then stuffed into a small car forced to share all her air with three other people who hadn't showered frequently in quite some time. She knew it would be a long while before they reached the college. Lacy adjusted her grip so that her muscles wouldn't grow tired as quickly and accidently brushed her hand against Daryl's thigh.

She felt his muscles tense under her arms. Lacy was mortified. If she didn't need to hold on to him to stay on the bike she would have let go immediately instead she just hid her face in his shoulder. Daryl wasn't sure why he had asked Lacy to ride with him. He had wanted company it seemed. He enjoyed how warm she felt against his back as they drove down the back roads. He never much enjoyed being in a stuffy car himself and after learning about Lacys claustrophobia he hadn't wanted to put her in any situation that might trigger it. Daryl wore a pair of scratched up sunglasses he had found in a wardens office to try and block some of the sun so he could see well enough to drive. Lacy's face was still tucked against his shoulder he wanted to look back at her but was too busy driving to do so. After a couple of hours driving along in silence Lacy tapped his shoulder.

"CAN WE MAKE A PIT STOP?" She had to yell to be heard over the loud roar of the engine. Lacy was embarrassed that she had to ask to use the bathroom but every tiny pebble under the tire of Daryl's bike made her bladder feel like it was going to burst. . Daryl slowly pulled off to the side of the road quickly followed by the others in the car. Michone got out first.

"What's going on?" She asked one hand on her katanna. Lacy was quickly making her way off into the edge of the woods.

"Had ta make a stop at the little gingers room." Daryl answered.

"Very funny." Lacy yelled from just out of sight. Michone chuckled.

"I'd be careful; She'll kick your ass Dixon." Lacy reemerged where the group was, clearing a tickle in her throat

"Yuck, I think I swallowed a bug." Lacy stuck her tongue out with distaste.

"Well don't breathe with your mouth dipshit." Daryl teased climbing back onto his bike.

Lacy climbed on behind him. Once the bike starting moving again Lacy began to feel adventurous maybe it was just adrenaline but she decided to be bold while she had Daryl cornered. She lowered her arms down and rested her clasped hands just above Daryl's belt buckle. The wind made by the bike when it was moving at a high speed like it was tousled the fabric of Daryl's shirt, every so often Lacy could feel the warm skin of Daryl's stomach brush against her hands causing a shiver to shoot down her spine. Lacy rested her lips and nose against Daryl's shoulder blade closing her eyes and letting the air rush all around her. She had never been on a motorcycle before today but it seemed to her that nothing could have been more pleasurable.

She understood now why Daryl loved his bike so much. As far as she was concerned the bike ride could have gone on forever but after another couple hours the bike began to slow. Lacy looked up now from Daryl's back seeing a large official looking building in front of her. As she began to climb off the bike the world seemed to tilt sideways. She stumbled and caught her foot on the seat of the bike she barely got it underneath her quick enough to save from falling on her face. She took a moment to regain her bearings while the others continued getting out of their respective seats.

They had all been too busy looking around them for signs of walkers or danger to notice her momentary lapse in grace much to her relief. There was the expected litter and rubbles about them at the entrance driveway, only a few feet ahead of where they parked was a body laying on the sidewalk of the campus. It was just the upper half of a walker who had a knife still lodged in its bald rotting head.

"Thats one ugly tree hugger." Daryl remarked as he walked up and placed his toe on its forehead removing the knife from its temple with a suction noise. Lacy felt warmer than usual whipping her hand against her forehead to remove the sweat that threatened to fall into her eyes. They entered through a door that wasn't locked with their weapons ready. Daryl was at the head of the group with a flashlight peering into every corner for lurkers.

It was difficult to keep their steps silent as they walked on broken glass from the fluorescent lights that used to illuminate the halls. Michone was to Lacy's right her eyes where sharp Lacy could tell. She seemed to be looking everywhere at once. They managed to find their way to the rooms they were looking for without much incident only killing a few walkers that had been trapped in class rooms along the way. They group spread out filling their bags to the brim with as many medical supplies as they could find. As much as they could find was still not enough, there was never enough of anything anymore. When the group was finished searching the rooms that might contain something helpful it was late day.

The group rounded a corner into a room as they made their way out and stumbled onto a sizable group of walkers. Their feet skidded at the speed of their halt quickly they spotted a door that read exit and made their way towards it keeping their weapons ready in case a walker got too close for comfort. They refrained from shooting until completely necessary afraid the noise would only worsen their situation. Everyone was breathing heavy as their senses went on high alert. Lacy felt again, a slight dizziness and weakness of muscle that she had first experienced when they arrived. Emerging down the stairwell they encountered another group of corpses that had been lurking in the building. This time with no choice but to push through Daryl and Lacy took a moment to take down the three closest to them with their knives. The group moved as quickly and quietly as they could trying to create as much distance as possible without knowing where they were headed. They needed to find an exit and quick before someone was walker food.

Michone hastily called attention to an exit sign over a door but that hope was lost quickly when walkers could easily be seen through the small glass window. There movements upstairs must have drawn all these rot bags up here to ambush them like this. Daryl counted the heads that bobbed up and down beside him as they jogged making sure everyone was still accounted for.

"There's no way out!" Bob said almost in a panic as they reached the end of the hall with walkers close behind, the smell of their rotting flesh and the sound of their moans was enough to make the hairs on Lacys neck stand up.

"Then we make one." Daryl growled as he picked up a chair that had been displaced from its home in a classroom at some point. He threw it through the glass of a large window just over their heads. Lacy immediately recognized how smart that idea was. They could all climb out easy enough but the walkers couldn't.

Daryl placed his cross bow up on the ledge outside the window and hoisted himself up choosing to stand at the side of the opening and offer his hand to Michone as she got ready to follow him. Once he had pulled her out of the hall he helped Lacy get out. Tyreese was next and then Bob. When Daryl pulled Bob up onto the ledge he was almost grabbed by the walkers who had finally managed to catch up with them. Daryl pulled Bob up with so much force it caused him to stumble forward and though his backpack over the edge of the building. He was lying on his stomach holding one strap of the bag with one hand while walkers pulled at it from below. There was a whole swarm of them below. They threatened to pull Bob over the edge. Lacy's reflexes felt blurred and slowed she wanted to act but was beat to it by Daryl and Michone who held onto Bobs legs to keep him on the ledge.

"Just let go of it, it's not worth it." Daryl yelled over the mass of moans and grumbles.

"No. I can't." Bob shouted back. He fought hard to free his bag when he finally pulled it free the strength of his final tug sent it flying back onto the roof with a crash. Everyone was silent and Bob was panting. Daryl stepped forward picking up the bag to see what had made the noise. He pulled an almost full bottle of scotch from within the bag and his knuckles began to turn white from the pressure he held the bottle with. Lacy wondered briefly who's last drink that had been. Tyreese's face was so badly injured it was hard to gauge his reaction but Michone couldn't look at Bob anymore. Lacy felt her knees shake slightly and coughed into her elbow.

"There aint no meds in you'r bag." Daryl spit with disgust. He went to throw the bottle from the roof but Bob who was now standing put a hand on his gun. A flash of raw anger burst into Daryl's eyes and he stepped towards Bob taking his gun away from him and shoving his face directly into Bobs.

"You take one sip before these meds get to our people and I'll beat you into the ground." With that comment Daryl shoved the bottle into Bobs chest and handed him back his gun as Bob whimpered softly almost to himself.

"I didn't mean to hurt nobody, It was just for when it gets quiet." In the time that the group had spent stationary Lacy had begun to feel increasingly worse she blinked rapidly and felt a labor to her breath.

"Lacy are you okay?" Michone asked.

"Im fin-" Lacy began to answer but she was interrupted by a series of thick flemy sounding coughs. She saw how Michone and Tyreese quickly took a step back from her as they sized up her appearance. Daryl looked over to Lacy now observing her with critical eyes. Her skin looked gray and her eyes were glossy she looked like Sasha had looked earlier that day. Daryl felt a rock in his gut. He looked around him again seeing the hands reaching at them from two sides. This had all gone downhill very quickly. Now the priority was to get Lacy back to the prison as quickly as possible. Daryl sighed heavily and let his hair fall over his face.

"Alright, alright we gotta get outta here quick. Lace. Stay close to me." Lacy met his eyes with as much determination as she could muster telling herself not to panic yet. Not until they were back and everyone was safe. There wasn't time to be sick right now, there were people counting on her to carry her own weight. The group looked out over their options and collectively sighed. There was a good chance they wouldn't all make it back alive.


	13. Essence of Time

The air was heavy with moisture so thick it felt like it was raining without a cloud in the sky. The Georgia heat was unbearable as the beating sun baked every dark surface until it was hot enough you could fry an egg on it. Even at this hour of the day it must have been at least 90 degrees. Daryl chose to keep Lacy on his bike despite her weakness rather than force the others into close quarters with someone who was ill. They were all afraid though they didn't vocalize it. None of them wanted to get sick but Daryl knew he had already been exposed back in the prison that first day the same time she had and if not back then most certainly on the ride up. He knew if he was going to get it there was nothing to do about it. Knowing all these things taking her on his motorcycle seemed the best option. Lacy was holding onto his waist with much less vigor than she had on the trip up. He took every bump with more caution then might be necessary to avoid throwing her off the back. He recalled with a blush the way her cold hands felt on the sensitive skin of his lower stomach just a few hours ago. He thought he heard a soft groan from behind him but he couldn't tell over the loud roar of his bikes engine, he slowed his pace just a bit in case. The sun was setting now and it was clear they were going to have to stop for the night rather than go directly back to the prison. Daryl considered pushing on in the dark for Lacy's sake but he knew how dangerous the roads were in the day braving them at night would put them all at risk. Daryl honked once to signal to Michone that he was stopping as he pulled off next to a boarded up farm house. It would have to do for the night though it looked like it might have been in rough shape even before the outbreak. When the bike had stopped and he had cut the engine Lacy still hadn't let go of his waist. Daryl looked over his shoulder with a raised eyebrow to see what the holdup was. Lacys eyes were completely blank as she looked ahead of them towards the house. There was no recognition that they had stopped moving.

"Lacy?" Daryl prompted softly.

"Huh? Wah?" Lacy mumbled groggily. She shook her head slightly to knock the haziness from her mind.

"We have to stop for the night; we won't make it back before nightfall." Daryl continued still trapped within her arms. He was beginning to feel an unusual tickle in the base of his stomach at the length of her embrace. He quickly glanced over his shoulder with worry to the others beginning to exit their car. Lacy felt sluggish and drained as she drifted through her mind imagining what it felt like to die. After another agonizingly long moment Daryl sighed and broke her embrace by standing up. Lacy fell slack forward for a moment losing balance without him to stabilize her on the bike seat. Daryl quickly moved to catch her and help her stand up.

"Have you had any water today?" Daryl asked looking at the dim flat gray color of Lacy's skin and the dry flakes on her less than rosey lips. She shook her head no rather than answering she wasn't sure if her voice would even work. Daryl sighed and pulled a water bottle from the bag over his shoulder holding it up to her mouth as she gulped greedily her eye still unfocused.

"If ya weren't sick that would be enough to do this ta ya, as it is you should probably drink the rest a this bottle. Wooh, but slow down or yer gonna throw it all up." Lacy tried to control herself taking the bottle from Daryl and lightly sipping and holding the cool delightful moisture in her mouth. Her hands shook with the effort of holding the bottle on her own. Standing a distance back Michone and the others waited with weary eyes on Lacy's back.

"Stay here by the bike I'll be right back." Lacy glanced over her shoulder and saw the others keeping their distance.

"Don't worry the leper will stay away." A pang of guilt hit Daryl as he walked passed her and over to talk with Michone who was the only one still standing and looking towards them. The others were retrieving their supplies from the trunk and gathering their weapons.

"We gotta stop fer the night, figured we'd hold up here till dawn, head out first thing." Daryl waved a hand towards the house as he explained only now coming to a stop in front of her. Michone nodded looking at the house and readying her katana.

"What about Red?" Daryl noticed his nickname being used by somebody else and felt a wave of possessiveness pass over him.

"What, ya want me ta tie her ta the porch?" Daryl shot back in a growl. Lacy might be sick but he wasn't about to chain her outside like a dog just so these sorry saps could sleep a little easier. She would just have her own room and they could all stay as far away from it as they desired.

"That's not what I said." Michone remarked coldly

"I just meant will she be alright until the morning?"

"Shes gonna have ta be, aint nothing we can do 'bout it now." Daryl remarked Michone nodded.

"How are you feeling? She's been on your bike with you" Daryl noticed the distance Michone was keeping now. He was glad maybe everyone would give him some space tonight.

"I'm fine. " Daryl's response was short and biting. This situation was really beginning to grate on him. Daryl saw Michone looking over his shoulder and turned to see Lacy walking away towards the side of the house where there were trees clustered.

"Should she be going off on her own like that?"

"No." Daryl replied watching her shrinking silhouette in the dimming light. Her figure was just a bluish outline drifting across the shadowy edge of the yard.

"Can you guys handle clearing the house on your own?" Daryl looked back to Michone. She nodded her consent as he took the chance to jog after Lacy who was almost out of view now.

"Hey!" he called out as he began nearing her.

"Thought I told ya ta wait by the bike." Daryl called slightly out of breath. Lacy said nothing setting down the bag she was carrying with a shaky hand. She began unrolling a blanket and laying it under a tree. The sun was peeking through the trees as it got lower in the sky. The trunks were all casting long shadows along the forest floor with bright golden beams in between.

"What are you doing?" Daryl asked knowing that he didn't want to be having this conversation right now.

"What does it look like?" Lacy replied sarcastically setting herself down slowly on the blanket and looking up at Daryl's looming figure. His hair was growing long and was casting a shadow over his blue eyes. He had one hand on the strap that held his crossbow on his back

"No one's going to make ya sleep outside Red."

"Nobody can make me do anything. I'm choosing to stay out here. It's not for you guys I just don't want to be inside tonight." Lacy knew she wasn't being completely honest she would blame it on her claustrophobia and truthfully that was part of it but she was staying outside because she knew she was infected. She knew she was sick and she wasn't going to have anyone else's blood on her hands. If they got sick because of her she knew it could mean their death. Lacy thought again about her death. Would it really be from some sickness? She had always imagined that she would go out in a blaze of fire taking down as many walkers as she could before going down. Daryl looked at the determination on Lacy's face and knew that arguing it wasn't going to get him anywhere.

"Fine." Daryl said plopping on the ground next to her and taking out a bag of trail mix he had in his bag chewing each individual piece as he ate it.

"What are you doing?" Lacy asked looking at him sitting beside her.

"Well yer not coming in and ya can't stay out here alone." Daryl used his bag as a lumpy replacement for a pillow as he leaned against a tree trunk to get more comfortable. He wasn't sure about what he was doing, staying outside wasn't the most appealing idea but he didn't think he would get much sleep regardless and her being alone outside would only weigh on his conscious.

"Aren't you afraid of getting sick?" Lacy asked quietly not looking at him as she spoke instead picking apart a leaf on the ground.

"Aint scared ah nothing."Daryl chewed a peanut until it was nothing but mush before picking up an almond and placing it between his lips. Lacy let out a laugh like a snort through her nose.

"Famous last words of many a dumb ass." Lacy burst into a series of thick coughs feeling her stomach muscles squeeze with every jagged breath. Despite the heat Lacy felt herself begin to shiver. She wiggled forward to sit in a suns beam to try and absorb some heat while it lasted. Daryl's eyes hadn't missed her tremors he leaned forwards and slid off his leather jacket. It was far too warm for it anyway he had only been wearing it to cut down on some of the wind while riding his bike. He silently reached out a hand towards Lacy presenting her with his jacket. She looked at it confused for a moment.

"I'm fine, really." She insisted eying the jacket with large pained eyes.

"yer shivering, just stop being a pain in my ass and take it." Daryl reminded himself that taking someone's help when they offered it wasn't his strongest suit ether. He couldn't help feeling frustrated with her as she fought him on everything. She slowly slid her arms into the jacket wincing a little as her muscles resisted the movements. The leather smelled of cigarette smoke and earth as it enveloped her in his residual warmth. Lacy pulled the collar tight around her tucking her face into the collar and closing her eyes. She kept her elbows tucked closely to her body and her knees tucked towards her chest.

"if I ask ya ta stay put will ya listen this time?" Lacy nodded with a small smirk.

"If you're sick of my already this is going to be a long night." Lacy remarked playfully.

"Yeah it is" Daryl shot back with spite as he stalked back towards the house to check on the others and update them on his sleeping arrangements. How did he get himself into this situation? He never once was put into so many strange predicaments with another person in the group like this. What made her so different? Why was he feeling so drawn to her? She was just some nutcase survivalist with a death wish. Daryl walked through the over grown grass at an angle cutting towards the houses front steps He could feel the pull from the blades of grass as he shuffled his boots through it. He reached the porch in time to see tyreese carrying a bag in the front door which was now hanging by one hinge limply. There were two biters piled on the far side of the porch like trash waiting to go to the curb. Bob peeked through the doorway at the sound of Daryl's approach quickly looking behind Daryl to see if Lacy was following him.

"Where's lacy?" Bob asked quietly eying Daryl skeptically.

"Set er on fire in a field." Daryl mumbled darkly as he pushed past bob through the doorway looking for Michone. He wondered briefly if his comment had been heard by Yyreese. He didn't want to set him off on another rage fit but he couldn't help the bitterness he felt at bobs question. When he found Michone she was sitting perched on a counter in the kitchen sliding her katana against a sharpener she found in one of the drawers.

"Red says shes staying outside."

"You sure that's a good idea?"

"I'll stay with her" Daryl leaned his hands behind his back against the counter a few feet down from Michone who paused her work now to look at Daryl.

"Really had to twist your arm on that one." Michone poked at Daryl's motivations with a smirk.

"What's that supposed ta mean, I'm just tryin' ta keep you sorry bastards alive till we get back." Daryl swung his arm loosely at her looking back to the door frame that now held Bob.

"Look. All I'm saying is I don't see anyone else cozying up to her as quickly as you." Michone smiled fully letting the white of her teeth peek through her large ebony lips. She taunted Daryl with her eyes her shoulders were relaxed as if poking the bear didn't frighten her at all.

"I've already been exposed to whatever this shit is. Same time as her. You guys don't need to get sick too. That leaves me to go out there with her." Daryl said nothing else turning to go scrounge up some blankets before returning to Lacy. He resented Michone's comments prickling at the implications of him sleeping off alone near her. Daryl turned away from a hallway closet with his arms full of blankets too see Bob approaching him.

"Here take her these, It's an antibiotic. Maybe if this is an infection this will help her get some sleep. " Daryl tucked the pills into the breast pocket of his shirt double checking that it didn't have any holes first.

"Thanks doc." Daryl muttered his appreciation before heading back towards where he had left Lacy. As he began to near the cluster of trees the sun had almost fully set only a slight purple hue was left cast over the foliage. A soft melody drifted to Daryl's ears causing him to stop and listen. Ahead of him Lacy was singing softly to herself. Daryl dared a few more quiet steps forward before stopping and crouching down to listen.

"'Cause I'm just one of those ghosts

Traveling endlessly

Don't need no roads

In fact they follow me

And we just go in circles

But now I'm told that this life

And pain is just a simple compromise

So we can get what we want out of it"

Daryl hadn't noticed himself leaning forward while he listened until he was off balance twisting his foot quickly to try and maintain squatting. The turn of the rubber soul of his boot on the damp grass made a loud squeaking noise which startled Lacy into silence. She peeked around the tree she sat at the base of to see Daryl scrambling to stand up and appear as though he was walking. It was too late though she had seen him. Daryl decided the best way to handle the situation was by completely ignoring it.

"Brought you some meds help ya sleep." he dug two fingers into the pocket to grab the small white pills and hand them over.

"Wont we have to take turns sleeping?" Lacy asked trying to hide the fatigue in her voice.

"Nah Tyreese can see us from the porch. Him and bob are taking turns since neither of them have to drive tomorrow." Daryl set to work laying out the blankets he had brought from inside. He threw himself down onto them with a grunt and tucked his hands behind his head.

"thank you." Lacy said softly looking away into the darkening sky.

"Fer what?" Daryl replied his curiosity getting the best of him.

"For letting me ride on your bike, for the Journal, for staying out here with me tonight, for

everything." She looked back at his face now her heart bursting from her crystal eyes.

"s'Nothin'" Daryl mumbled shifting uncomfortably under Lacys gaze. He felt his blood pumping in his veins and his heart quickening. She didn't look real sitting a few feet away hidden in a veil of total darkness. She could have been a figment of his imagination.

"I think we need a fire." Daryl averted her gaze as he began clearing away a spot to build a fire between them.

Daryl was quickly able erect a make shift fire pit as Lacy gazed on, watching his every movement. Daryl managed to scrounge up a decent sized pile of wood and began to set up a bed for the fire. As he did so he would take the occasional glance of in Lacy's direction to ensure she was still conscious. Partly because he was worried for her safety, but deep down, his instincts told him that in the end, his own survival ways priority number one. If Lacy were to turn, he would have to be the one to put her down.

"Y'all with me red?" Daryl said over his shoulder, a mixture of concern and obligation in his voice.

"Why? You disappointed?" Lacy scoffed with a hint of playfulness in her voice. Her statement followed by a a series of coughs.

Daryl smirked slightly, followed by a look of puzzlement. He quickly felt his pockets of the tattered leather vest that dawned his chest, and slowly moved to the pockets of his pants. He had lost his lighter, and panic started to over take him. Trying not to show Lacy his moment of error and calmly and slowly got up and approached her.

Lacy now laying down on her blankets shifted her self up to see an approaching Daryl. His silhouette seemed powerful, comforting, and meant security. Lacy started to see why the others were drawn to him, and why they followed Daryl and Rick. They made them feel safe, and Lacy started to fall into this web of safety.

"Lax' darlin' I got this" Lacy heard as Daryl passed her. Capitalizing on this alone time Lacy decided to do something she hadn't had time for recently: she reached into her jacket and pulled out the journal she had been given recently. With it she drew a pen and lost her self in the journals pages, recounted everything that has happened to her since the turn. So little time had past, yet to her, it felt like years.

Daryl had to be no more than fifteen feet away from Lacy when suddenly something shiny caught his eye. The bright moonlight caught his lighter in the tall dark grass. He bent down, and with a sigh of relief picked it up. He could feel the cold of the metal in his hand. He narrowly dodged a bullet and started to march over toward Lacy.

"Let's get some fire started, warm up tha' corpse of yours" This was Daryls poor attempt at a joke, which given the circumstances seemed a little inconsiderate.

Lacy made no reply.

"Red? Y'still with me?" Lacy made no sounds. Daryl rushed over and completely forgot about the fire as he went into survival mode. He grabbed her up and quickly pressed his hand to her neck. No pulse. Panicking Daryl quickly started to worry. As he put her down to draw his knife he grabbed her wrist...a pulse. "Great" he thought, but then before he could think about being relieved, he quickly realized that if he didn't get Lacy back to the prison and Hershel fast, Lacy wouldn't survive the night. He grabbed her seemingly weightless body and slung her over his shoulder. Adrenaline kicked in and he could feel his heart racing inside of him.

"WAKE UP! MON' WE GOTTA GET BACK TO THE PRISON!" Darly yelled as the rest of the group rushed out of the house to see what the chaos was about.

"Whats wrong? What is all this commotion about?!" Michone asked but she quickly was able to see the answer before her eyes. "Is she dead?" she asked.

"NO! But if we don' do somethin' fast she will be lets go! Open the door im puttin' her in the back" Daryl headed toward the door of the vehicle but was met with a sword in his face.

"If you put her in there, with us, you're risking all our lives. And I can't let that happen Dixon" Michone struggled to get these words out. Her face was guilt ridden, but she was firm in her words.

"We gon' do this ri' now? Here? With her in my arms?" Daryl said this in an unfamiliar tone. He sounded angry, just as he had been way back when he met Rick for the first time, when he discovered they had left Merle on that damned roof. Goosebumps ran down his neck, while rage filled his face. Was it love? Fear? Helplessness? Daryl didn't even quite know how to feel.

"Fuck you! Ill bring'er with me then! Y'all better keep up, I ride fast when lives depend on it!" Daryl said this as he jogged over to his bike, Lacy slung over his shoulder like a rug.

"Daryl wait! We don't know if she will turn!" Bob said this with genuine concern in his voice.

"I ain't in a mood to take life advice from a deadbeat alcoholic. Now do somethin' useful and help her up ." Bob fearing potential infection scrambled to find something to cover his face. Daryl picking up on this quickly grabbed a rag and through it in his face in a rather aggressive manor. Time was of the essence.

Knowing Lacy couldn't hold on by herself, Daryl quickly pulled a piece of rope from his pack and tied Lacy to himself as Bob helped lay her into his lap. He could feel her chest heave under her weak breathing. Her heart beat against his leg. He could feel her struggle, such a strong woman, such a weak state. Proving once more the unpredictability of this hell they now live in. Daryl knew this could be the end of him, if she were to turn while he was tethered to her, he would be defenseless. The unrest was clearly visible on his face and Bob soon acknowledged this.

"Daryl, look you don't need to do this, you know that! There are other ways. I could try to give her the medicine." Bob tried to put Daryl at ease, but to no avail.

"We ain't got time t'try! She needs Hershel!" Daryl revved his bike, the sound filled the area and echoed throughout the property. "If you guys are smart, you'd head out soon, th'sounds gonna bring every geek for miles down on us."

"DARYL! SHE DROPPED THIS!" Michone screamed over the roar of Daryls bike, and quickly handed him the small tattered book. It was Lacy's journal.

Daryl quickly glanced at the tattered small book, and then hastily tucked it into his vest. He shot a nod of thanks at Michone and the others, and Michone returned the nod, hers more a nod of luck. With one final rev, Daryl sped off into the night, the dirt kicking up under his back tire. The race against time was on. Daryl had to save Lacy, he wouldn't let anyone else he cared about die.


	14. (Part 1) Assylum

Lacy's feet dangled above the purple carpet from the wooden seat she sat in. She played hundreds of scenarios through her head about what she would say what she would do as soon as someone came in to speak to her. It had been six months now since her rescue from her father's home but nothing felt different. She was constantly being shuffled from place to place. No one ever told her what was going on they all just looked at her with sad eyes and whispered to each other as she sat and waited. She had been waiting her whole life she didn't know what she was waiting for anymore. For a while it had been to be saved, to be taken away but now that she finally had been she found that she wasn't done waiting yet. She wondered for a moment if she ever would be. She was sick of letting her life to be pieced back together by strangers. Lacy felt rage and contempt for the awful building she was being housed in.

The children there were cruel and unruly and no one would ever leave her alone. All she had wanted since her rescue was to have some time alone but the only time she had to herself had been in showers or just in the bathroom in general. When she had first arrived she had gone into the bathrooms and let the water run while she laid on the cold tile floor listening to it. She hated water and she didn't want to actually shower but she needed to think. She needed to try and process what was happening all around her. She had loved pretending to take showers just for the peace but she quickly realized that the people around her were jumping to conclusions. They were asking her if she felt dirty, if she wanted to talk about the men her father brought around. The idea of talking about what she had been through made her sick to her stomach and she decided only to shower once a day from then on out if only to avoid those questions. She hadn't even considered them before that. Did she feel dirty? She shuddered at the idea of being clean, the idea of innocence. What was she? She certainly didn't feel like a child. The door finally opened and the child services worker she had been waiting for entered.

The woman was short and heavy set. She wore a paint suit and nurses' shoes all in black like usually. Lacy thought cynically that black might be a sliming color but it could only do so much. The woman's eyes were small and beady behind a pair of glasses. Her hair was brown and her tight curls were pulled back away from her round face on a half pony tail.

"Hello Lacy."

"Hello Ms Bacon." Lacy replied with no emotion in her voice. She felt the fight in her leaving. As much as she wanted to yell and scream and run she knew she wouldn't. She had no other choice. Who else was there to turn too? She felt her vision fog as she let her eyes unfocus and her eye lids droop. She didn't want to be here. She didn't want anything except maybe a chocolate bar.

"Do you know what we are here to talk about today?" Ms. Bacon asked her with her hands folded atop her neatly organized desk. Lacy's eyes fell on a sunflower post it note stack as she refused to answer. The loopy cursive script on the post its reminded Lacy of third grade. The last year she had been in school when she had begun to learn to write in cursive. It had always been her favorite part of the school day.

"You have been through a lot Lacy. I know that. What we are going to discuss is going to be hard to hear but I think you deserve the truth. It took me this long to convince the others of it but we owe you this much." Lacy looked up now seeing in her mentors eyes a softness and understanding. Lacy squirmed under her gaze. She wanted to recoil she didn't want anyone to look at her. She pulled her sweater tighter around her and pulled her feet up on to the seat of the chair. She still hadn't spoken when Ms Bacon continued.

"We are here to talk about your mother." Lacy felt her heart jump into her throat she had always dreamed that her mother would come for her. She had dreamed of being taken away to a big white house where she would have brothers and sisters and a dog and she could go to school and make friends. She pictured her mother to be a beautiful woman with a warm smile who wore long dresses and flowers in her hair. Lacy listened closely now feeling herself drawn into the conversation.

"Your mother suffered from postnatal psychosis. Do you know what that is?" Lacy shook her head no she gripped the edge of her seat tightly feeling waves of anxiety flow through her. She knew this was bad news. She knew her mother wasn't going to come get her but she wanted so badly to believe otherwise.

"It's a rare illness but your mother was bipolar er.. ah she had a lot of mood swings, which increased the likely hood significantly. Post natal Psychosis is when a mother becomes depressed after giving birth. She feels detached from here child as though it wasn't really hers. She began to hallucinate and she lost touch with reality." Ms Bacon stopped speaking and removed her small metal glasses from her face that began to sheen with moisture in the warm office. She held her glasses in her hands as she thought carefully about her words. She ran a plump finger with a delicately designed fingernail over the frames as she gathered herself.

"Your mother was very ill… She tried…." There was indecision and sorrow on her face as she tried to say whatever it was she was keeping from Lacy. Lacy waited as patiently as she could desperate for every thread of information about her mother.

"She tried to drown you when you were an infant but your father came home in time to stop her. He tried to get her treatments but before he had time to get her to any of her doctor's appointments she had committed suicide. That's when your father changed. I worked on your case back then just like I'm here now. I didn't know what he would become. I thought he would take care of you. I'm sorry Lacy. I'm sorry I left you there with him." Ms. Bacon's eyes were watery as she looked at the small fragile preteen in front of her. A girl who had only ever known survival and fear.

Lacy saw her mentor's tears and her stomach twisted in discomfort. Lacy didn't feel like crying she had known all along that her mother was dead. Her father had told her once and she had chosen not to believe it but she had already prepared for this fact years ago and she wasn't sad now. She wasn't sure how to comfort someone and she felt an incredibly pressure to do so. She tried to smile at Ms Bacon to ease her sorrow but nothing came to her. She looked to her left out a window as she decided against doing anything about it at all.

"And I won't be adopted." Lacy stated flatly. She knew there was more for Ms. Bacon to tell her and she had heard the other kids saying it since she arrived. Lacy was alone but she didn't care she didn't need anyone else. She never had.

"We don't know that, it's true your age is difficult to find a home for. Most families that come through here are looking for younger children but you're a bright girl Lacy and your sweet there's no way to say for sure that you won't be adopted." Ms Bacon's voice pleaded with Lacy to hold on to hope but Lacy had never had any to begin with.

"It's fine. I don't mind." Lacy replied trying to comfort her mentor this time hoping that her words would make that look on Ms Bacon's face leave. Ms. Bacon's confused silence gave Lacy the opportunity to ask another question.

"What about my dad and the courts? Will I have to see him again?" Lacy fidgeted in her seat. She curled her thin fingers around the toes of her sneakers feeling the beat up rubber bending under her hands.

"No, not if you don't want to. He's fighting this in court but he can't win. If they ask you to testify he will be in the court room with you but there will be a lot of other people there to protect you. He won't be able to hurt you again." Lacy nodded and looked back at the sunflower post its. She kicked her feet off the seat and let them dangle once again.

"Lacy? Are you okay?" Lacy waited a moment accessing herself, was she okay? How do you know?

"Yeah. I think so. I'm free… at least there is that." Lacy spoke unable to meet her mentors eyes. At least there is that, she repeated to herself. She would just have to hold onto that for as long as she could.

Lacy took in a large ragged breath followed by a long series of coughs that seemed to knock the very wind out of her soul. She gasped for air and clutched her arms to her chest throwing herself upright to try and stop from choking on her flem. Her hair was matted to the back of her neck with sweat and her clothes were soaked through. Her long thick hair felt suffocating against her face so she frantically scrapped it away from her skin and piled it on top of her head with her hands. How did she get here? This room again. She looked around her at the cement walls and the cold hard floor. How did he find her? Lacy recalled being rescued from this room when she was only 12 and now so much later she was here again. Or was she? The glass in the wall in front of her didn't feel right. Had there always been a window in the basement wall? Hadn't it only been one room? Lacy couldn't remember but she was sure this was her father's house that she was back in that basement and that he would never let her escape again.

Lacy stood up letting her hair fall once again and from the corner of her eye she saw his face. His drunken slobbering face wrinkled and weathered with an untamed beard. She spun around quickly only to lose him again. He was toying with her. Lacy heart was racing she needed to get out and NOW. Lacy's body felt shaky and weak as she stood in the center of the room as far away from the walls as possible. She looked back at the bed with confusion. She hadn't had a bed in the basement. Somewhere in Lacy's mind a voice told her she was someplace else, this room wasn't right. This couldn't be the basement. Lacy sat down feeling the weight of the air pushing down on her like thick fog. Lacy tried to remember what she had been doing last time she was awake and a face came to her mind sending her hurtling back into reality. Daryl. Lacy was struggling to keep her thoughts straight. Her chest burned with every breath and her head was pounding in her ears. She slowly fell on to her side curling her body inward and letting thick painful sobs begin to roll out of her. She was sick. She was very sick and now she was trapped. The sobs were all that came; no tears could surface from her lying eyes as images of her father's face shot into the corners of her vision again and again. He was always just out of sight skirting around her but he was there with her.

Lacy hadn't realized she had fallen asleep but as she reopened her eyes it wasn't her father she saw but Daryl. He sat against the wall in front of her with an arm propped on one knee. The brace she had given him was on his limp arm and he looked like he might have been there for a long time.

"Welcome back." He mumbled twisting his fingers around and looking at her from under his unkempt hair. Lacy looked at him with disbelief. Was he really there? If she spoke to him would she be talking to herself? Had she lost her mind? Lacy needed answers so she risked her sanity to try and get them.

"I need out. I need out now." Her voice was much weaker then she had known and trying to speak had brought on a new wave of painful coughs that made her shoulders shake. Her muscles were tight and sore from sleeping on the hard floor. Daryl looked at her but said nothing.

"Daryl, I can't. I need to be out of here, my father he…" Lacy trailed off realizing he wouldn't understand. She tried to tell him that her father was there that he was watching her. She couldn't voice those thoughts. She wasn't even sure Daryl was real and she knew sounding insane wouldn't get her out if he was. Daryl's face looked pained when Lacy spoke. He reached into his vest and pulled out her journal tossing it in front of her. She looked at it and reached out a shaking hand to touch it and feel if it was real. Her heart raced as she asked him something she was very afraid to hear the answer to

"Have you read it?"

"Yeah…Sorry"

"All of it?"

"Yeah…" Daryl's voice was very soft as he looked at the ground rather than meet her eyes. Lacy felt a deep invasion of privacy an intimate part of herself was now naked in front of him and she hadn't known. She had written down all that had happened to her since the outbreak and just recently she had begun discussing her childhood. Daryl knew more about her than any living person and she hadn't agreed to it. She thought for a moment that she was angry but she quickly realized she was just scared. Scared of losing this friend that she was inexpertly growing close with. Daryl took a long heavy breath before lying down and curling up to mirror Lacy his eyes in perfect line with hers. He still said nothing as the journal and Lacy's outstretched hand still lay between them.

"I can't let ya out."Daryl's voice was so gentle even through the scruffy southern drawl.

"Please" Lacy pleaded with her eyes. She was trapped and she couldn't die in here. Lacy continued.

"I'll leave ill go far away so I can't get anyone else sick I just can't stay in here, I can't die in here. Please Daryl" Daryl was quiet for a long moment.

"But what if you can get better. What if the medicine starts ta help? Then you could stay. You just have to wait." Lacy felt tears those dry sobs coming on again. Daryl looked at her another long moment before sitting back up and reaching down to her. His strong warm hands gripped her shoulders and forced her to stand up.

"Come on." He mumbled guiding her back to her bed. She sat on it as he stood before her he squatted down to her level.

"Lacy…I don't know why I'm here. I don't know what to do. I just… I want…" He trailed off confusion and uncertainty shone from his crystal eyes. He didn't explain himself further he just hung his head and stood up before walking out of the room. Lacy scrambled to try and follow him. Before she could get to the door it was closed and locked. Her heart began to race and she ran to the window before screaming as loud as she could. Her own voice sounded so far away. She began to panic. Returning to her spot on the floor and rocking herself back and forth. She closed her eyes trying to see anything but the walls that were pushing in around her again. She began to count to herself.

"One, two, three" she rocked to the rhythm of her counting trying to block her mind from doing anything else.

"Four, five, six" She took deep ragged breaths in-between each number.

Lacy woke from her spot on the floor. She had been counting for so long that she eventually had lost consciousness again. Her mouth felt less dry then before. She hadn't remembered drinking anything but she had lost some of the incessant thirst from before. Her head was still pounding but she felt more alert. How long had it been since she was put in here? Lacy remembered the familiar separation from time. She knew what it was like to completely lose the concept and how disorienting it becomes. She stood up now with more energy then she had felt in what felt like years but really couldn't have been more than a week. Or could it? Lacy paced quickly around the room the only thought she had was "out, out out!" She felt hands on her. She spun around trying to brush them off but no one was there. She felt again the pain shoot through her as a hand came down on her face.

"NO" she screamed as she crumpled to her knees trying to block the imaginary attack. Lacy's head shot up. The glass had to be the answer she ran full force into the glass praying for it to shatter without much resistance. Lacy's shoulder slammed into the glass without so much is cracking it sending her falling backwards to the ground with a thud. Shooting pains spread from her shoulder and neck as she lay crumpled on the icy floor. She was dizzy and the floor seemed to be wobbling back and forth like a boat on high seas. Lacy stood tall again with her knees shaking under her weight. 'no, no, no' Lacy couldn't think anything else. She felt pure panic surge through her veins like electricity. She ran full force again into the window. This time she could hear the loud whack sound her shoulder bone made as it hit the solid glass. Lacy turned around looking for anything she could throw into it. She quickly ran to the small sink that was attached to a wall in the corner she stomped a foot down as hard as she could severing the porcelain from the wall. Picking it up her arms that shook violently she turned around and lugged the sink to the window. When she was close enough she began to spin before releasing the cold smooth and useless wall fixture from her grasp. It shattered immediately upon hitting the glass sending small bits of shrapnel back at lacy. She felt pieces grazing her arms and face leaving behind warm trails she looked down to see shallow cuts all over her. One gash in particular made itself known. There was blood dripping into Lacy's vision as she reached up to touch her tender temple. Her fingers came back red with blood. She didn't care she again ran as fast and hard as she could towards the window this time throwing her other shoulder in. She thought she saw faces on the other side of the glass looking at her trying to talk to her. She was blinded with desperation unable to pay enough attention to anything they may have been trying to tell her. As she began to ready herself to run again the door flew open and her father came running in. His voice sounded strange in her ears but she couldn't tear her eyes away from his horrible features. She screamed from the top of her lungs lunging out to strike him before he could hurt her. Her finger nails dug into his cheek and he cried out backing away with his hands up and closing the door. Voices nearby seemed heated and Lacy began to fear what he would do when he returned. Would he kill her? Lacy beat her fists into the glass. After a moment the door opened again this time Daryl walked in.

"LET ME OUT, I CANT BREATH IN HERE!" she screamed tugging at her hair.

"calm down" Daryl pleaded with her. His knees were bent and his arms were stretched out as he slowly approached her.

"NO! I need out I need out now! He can't keep me in this basement anymore!" Lacy covered her mouth with her hand and felt shakes go down her spine as she tried desperately to breathe in. Daryl was still slowly approaching her and she thrashed out an arm at him with a screech catching his forearm with hr nails.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" she yelled. She held her ground trying to appear as strong as she could. She wasn't a child anymore she could protect herself she could fight back this time. She wouldn't let herself be a victim ever again. Daryl moved quickly grabbing her and pulling her into a tight bear hug. He held her arms down and pulled her close so she was unable to move. She struggled against him fighting to free herself. She tried relentlessly for a long few minutes before collapsing into his shoulder and sobbing. Tears rushed down her face this time as she let all of her weight, physical and the weight she carried inside, fall on to him.

"Yer okay" his soft voice reached her left ear as he moved a hand to the back of her head stroking her wild hair soothingly.

"I'm sorry." Lacy whimpered feeling so many emotions washing over her at once.

"I'm gonna take ya out of here now." Daryl's voice sounded almost angry as he said the words Lacy wanted to hear most.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Lacy gasped between sobs as she rested her forehead on his shoulder. Daryl pulled away from her placing a hand on the small of her back and guiding her out of the door. Outside the room Lacy saw Carol, Herschel and Rick standing with heavy faces. Rick had a fresh set of gashes across his cheek. Remorse flooded over Lacy as she realized her mistake.

"Daryl" Rick began

"Step back" Daryl growled eyeing Rick with contempt as he continued moving down the hall. Lacy could feel the sun waiting for her outside she knew she was getting closer and all she could think about was the fresh air and open sky. The hall way was damp and dark but Lacy's joy was so over powering that it seemed to her like a beautiful passage to Eden. Lacy looked over at her rough and tumble savior with new eyes and saw that he had come back. He had read her journal. He had seen her demons and he was still here. He had saved her and he was still here. Lacy's chest swelled with gratitude and she vowed to herself to make it up to him. She wasn't sure how she could ever do for him what he had done for her but she would try.


	15. (Part 2) Rough Edges and Honest Eyes

It was that time of night again the time when the guards shifted over. Daryl had become a creature of habit over the past week every night he would sneak into death row and visit Lacy. He would stay with her for hours until the guard switched over again and he could sneak back out. He told himself he was being discrete to keep Herschel off his back but he knew part of him didn't want anyone to know where exactly he was spending most of his nights. Daryl walked quickly and quietly down the dark hallway towards D block with his ears perked up listening for anyone who might be around. He rounded the last corner and saw that Maggie and Tyreese were in the midst of switching guard. Daryl crept along the wall staying to the shadows and snuck in behind them while they talked and embraced. 'So far so good' he thought to himself, he heard the distinct sound of coughing coming from every direction. Daryl kept his eyes down not wanting to look at the sick people around him. He knew, they knew, why he was here. It had become obvious and impossible to hide from the people living in this cell block but the word hadn't gotten around to Rick yet and Daryl thanked them all inwardly for not ratting him out. Daryl had a set of keys that unlocked every door in this prison. He and Rick were the only two people that constantly had a full set of keys on them. Daryl heard the clicking of Herschel's crutch and turned around quickly. He was caught red handed. Daryl sighed heavily as he looked at the old man before him.

"Daryl, take these to her." Herschel held out a steaming cup and two pills. Daryl was taken back, he thought for sure he was about to get an ear full about being there.

"How long ya known?" Daryl asked. Had Herschel known all along? A small smile came across Herschel's face and his smooth voice confirmed Daryl's fears.

"I've known all along Daryl. You aren't as sneaky as you think you are. That tea will help her fever and the pills are her antibiotics. She needs to take them soon,I've had my hands full today. Since you're here it would help me if you could take them to her." Daryl nodded once and took the items from Herschel who immediately adjusted his crutch and shifted his weight around. Daryl was embarrassed and upset about being caught. He looked at the floor and waited another moment as Herschel began to speak again.

"Son, I'm with this people every day and I think know what you're feeling. You don't have to hide and sneak around to see her. Often when our loved ones grow ill we cherish our time with them like never before. In this world today you don't have to be ill to die suddenly. So cherish her Daryl and don't be ashamed of it. If you hide from yourself and from everyone else you'll only regret it when you have run out of time. " Daryl looked up now feeling a small amount of comfort wash over him. Herschel clasped a hand on Daryl's shoulder and looked at him with so much love. Herschel felt like a father to him though Daryl never said it allowed. He had longed his whole life for a father like Herschel and since meeting the man he had grown to respect him so much more than he respected even Rick. Daryl nodded again feeling a swelling in his chest as he looked into Herschel's kind eyes and turned to head for Lacy's cell once again. He tucked the pills into his chest pocket and rummaged through his pants pocket for his keys. The heavy door had bars over the window and was an ugly muted shade of blue green.

He quickly found the key to Lacy's death row cell. He had marked it with a twist tie to minimize the time he spent out in the open not that it mattered anymore. He leaned his head against the cold metal for a moment preparing himself for what he was about to do. He kicked himself for going to her every night. What would merle think of him right now? Daryl remembered Herschel's face and took in a deep breath filling every last space in his lungs. This family he had made. These people who had pulled together and loved him like no one ever had before, they were the people that mattered. It didn't matter anymore what his brother would think of him. It didn't matter what his father had thought of him. Those people were dead and they had been replaced by the most incredible people he had ever met. He knew he didn't deserve them.

He spent every day trying to earn their affection and he would do it every day till he died. Daryl's fists tightened and before he could think about this any further he pushed into the room with a little more force than was necessary. He stepped into her dim cement asylum and locked the door behind him. His eyes scanned the room for her and landed on her small pale form leaning against the wall in the corner. Her head was tipped back and her eyes were closed. There was a sheen on her forehead and she looked more like a walker now then Daryl was comfortable with. He quietly approached her crouching down next to her to listen for her breathing. The cup of tea was warm in his hands. There was a soft whistle in her nose as she rested and it reassured Daryl enough for him to sit himself down facing her.

"Lace… can you hear me?" Daryl had tried speaking to her 4 or 5 nights in a row now and each time she had been completely absent. She had no idea who he was. She was hardly ever conscious for very long and when she was, she spoke nothing but nonsense. Lacy's eyes shot open and she immediately placed her hands on either side of her, each on a different wall, her shoulders were hunched forward and her elbows tight on her sides. She looked deranged in that position with deep shadowed eyes and matted hair. She let out a low snarl and tried to get further into the corner away from him.

"Lacy?" Daryl tried again. He hadn't realized it but he enjoyed talking to her since she had arrived. She was more like him then the others. She carried a lot of baggage but she took care of people. He liked her rough edges and her honest eyes. He was beginning to really miss her. He had lied to Beth when she asked about Lacy. He had told Beth that Lacy was doing well that she was looking healthier. Beth was worrying herself sick up with the kids and he knew it wasn't going to help any if he told her what was really happening. Lacy was in all honesty starting to look healthier she was moving around the cell now. Daryl always found her someplace different. Her skin was gaining color but Daryl worried that her mind was permanently fractured. He worried that she would never be the same after being in this cell. He knew she was claustrophobic but he could feel something beneath the surface. He knew there was more to what she was going through.

"I'm sorry, please don't hurt me." Lacy whimpered. Daryl's inside twisted. She was so afraid. Daryl sighed and did what he had done every night this week he grabbed a hold of Lacy and pulled her into his arms. At first she would gasp and struggle and cower but just like always she began to relax and curl into him. Daryl had his back pressed against the cold wall and Lacy had her face tucked into his neck he held her and she quietly mumbled to herself. He couldn't make out what she was saying and he had stopped trying days ago. He had sloshed some of the tea onto his hands when she had been struggling against him but he brought the cup up to her lips now and spoke softly in her ear

"Drink this." She took a small sip with her eyes closed. Her chin quivered as a small bead of tea dribble down to her neck. He fished the pills from his pocket awkwardly as she leaned on him. He set the tea down and used both hands to gently tilt her head back he wasn't sure how this was going to work. He quickly popped the pills into her mouth and picked the tea back up to help her swallow them. She struggled for a moment but took in a deep shaky breath after she had managed to get them down.

"Come on just a little more" He held the cup to her lips again and she weakly drank down the last of it. He relaxed his arms and let her curl into his lap. He stayed there holding her like that for 4 more hours just listening to her breath and letting her sleep on his shoulder. He wondered if the time he was spending with her was helping her get through this at all. He wondered if she even remembered this after he left. Daryl couldn't decide if he wanted her to remember or not. He was so torn. He stroked her hair for a long last moment before lifting her up and carrying her back to her bed. He knew she wouldn't stay there, since the second night she had been sleeping everywhere but her bed but at least for now he knew she would be comfortable. He felt heavy as he walked out of death row. He wasn't sleeping much at all anymore. He took a cat nap every 12 hours or so but he just couldn't let his guard down enough to rest.

Daryl beelined for the roof, Lacy's spot. He sat there thinking of her and pulling out her journal from his vest pocket. He turned it over in his hands twice before sighing and giving in to his curiosity. He had held onto it after she collapsed and had refused to read it at first. He had watched enough TV to know that girls don't like when you read their diaries but he needed to what was in this journal. Whatever she was reliving whatever she was afraid of she might have written it down. Maybe if he knew he could talk her back. Maybe he could save her and himself. Mostly though he just missed her and if he couldn't talk to her then maybe he could listen. Listen to her story through her own eyes.

Daryl's eyes probed the opening page and saw a swirly cursive script the first line read "Daryl gave me this journal and I don't think he knows how perfect this gift was. I'm trying not to attach too much emotion to this gesture but I just don't have words for how grateful I am to be able to write again." Daryl ran a hand through his hair and continued reading her journal. Before long he felt the heat of the sun beating down on him and he had read all that she had written. He starred at the blank pages in the back of the book wondering what secrets they knew. What stories were they destined to tell. Daryl felt sick. He understood now. Lacy was so much more like him than he had known.

It was growing dark again. Daryl had tried to hunt today but had only brought back a dozen or so rabbits and squirrels. The deer he had discovered with Lacy had evaded him all day and he knew if he stayed out past dark he might find one but he had to be back. He had to see her again. Daryl was grateful to be able to hunt alone again. The reason was the limited amount of healthy people left and that reason was almost enough to ruin the solitude for him but he still enjoyed the mid clearing meditation that hunting was for him.

Daryl didn't bother trying to creep along the halls this time he walked towards Death Row blatantly. He didn't see anyone along the way and when he got to the door he saw that no one was standing guard. Daryl felt a flash of anger somebody wasn't doing their job and he would find out exactly who later. The walk to Lacy's cell seemed to take forever and her journal felt heavy in his pocket. Once he was inside he saw her curled up in a ball on the floor. There was any empty cup on the floor. Herschel must have been there already tonight. He sat down against the wall and looked at her. There was a rose color in her cheeks and her fingers twitched slightly. He laid a hand on her forehead feeling that she was only slightly warm now. He waited for a long while before her eyes opened.

"Welcome back" Daryl said looking at her hair pooling under her head across the ground.

"I need out, I need out now" Lacy's eyes pleaded with Daryl with a vigor. She immediately began coughing and gasping for air but it quickly passed. He was caught off guard. This was the first time she had directly spoken to him. It was the first time she seemed to understand what was happening around her. He felt hope building in him, she was getting better.

"Daryl, I can't. I need to be out of here, my father he…" Daryl saw her pain on her face and she trailed off without finishing her thought. He knew exactly what she was talking about. He knew what she had been through. His thoughts went to the scars on his back and he closed his eyes for a moment. He decided quickly that he would tell her just not today. He reached into his vest and pulled out her journal lightly tossing it between them. He waited for her anger. He waited for her to attack him for betraying her trust. He could try and explain why he had to do it but he didn't think it would matter. He would take what she had to throw at him. Her eyes zeroed in on the journal and widened.

"Have you read it?" She asked. Daryl's felt his stomach crawling up into his chest as anticipation built and his voice came out much softer than he intended.

"Yeah."

"All of it?" She asked now with her eye brows pulled together. She had her hand laid on it and she stared it at as if she wasn't sure it was real.

"Yeah..sorry" Daryl replied feeling the guilt on his shoulders. The anticipation of her reaction was beginning to become unbearable he wished for her to just slap him and get it over with. She starred at the journal for a long while emotions flashing across her features for moments before being replaced by something new. He realized now that she wasn't going to be angry with him

"I can't let you out." Daryl said answering her original pleas now.

"Please." Lacy begged him and he could feel her desperation rolling off her in waves. When she hadn't yelled at him the guilt he felt only intensified. He knew it was wrong to invade her privacy the way he had and when she hadn't said a word about it he somehow felt so much worse. He knew he deserved her anger. Now he had to tell her that he could let her out and she wasn't even mad then. Instead her sad eyes only begged for help that he couldn't give. Daryl felt the desire to vomit.

"I'll leave ill go far away so I can't get anyone else sick I just can't stay in here, I can't die in here. Please Daryl" When she said his name there was another heavy tug on his heart. Daryl felt anger building in him. Why was he doing this? why was he letting himself feel these things? He couldn't give up on her. He couldn't walk away. Daryl repeated her words in his head 'I can't die in here' He wanted so badly to take her away. To get her out of this room but he couldn't disobey Rick he owed everything he had to that man. Rick's the brother Merle never was. Daryl would do anything for Rick. He knew how much Rick had been through and he couldn't knowingly be the cause of anymore trouble for him. Daryl finally found words to answer Lacy after fighting his emotions back down to where he always kept them locked away.

"But what if you can get better. What if the medicine starts ta help? Then you could stay. You just have to wait." Daryl believed she would be okay. He had to. He wanted so badly to just give up and tell himself she was going to die anyway. He wanted to let her go and move on but he couldn't this time. He had been the master of not giving a fuck his whole life but not this time. Somehow he found himself so completely wrapped up in this that there was no way out. He cared and he couldn't fight it, he believed she would get better; she had to.

She couldn't have survived all that she had just to die like this. She was strong; she was a fighter she would come out of this. She just had to wait and he would help her wait. He saw tears glistening in her eyes and heavy sobs coming from deep in her chest. Daryl couldn't look at her like that anymore and it was time for him to leave again she had been asleep for so long. He wanted to stay and talk to her now that she seemed alert but he couldn't.

"Come on" he mumbled gripping her shoulders and helping her back to her bed just like every other night. He didn't need to carry her this time and she didn't fight his touch. He squatted in front of her as she sat on the edge of her bed.

"Lacy…I don't know why I'm here. I don't know what to do. I just… I want…" Daryl wanted to tell her, now that she might remember that he had been there. He wanted to explain that he was lost, that he was trying to help her but he didn't know how. He couldn't find any words and after a moment he hung his head and gave up.

His brother's voice in his head was taunting him. He scolded himself endlessly for his weakness for his stupidity. He turned and walked out quickly knowing she would try and follow. He thought he heard her scream but he shook it out of his brain and headed back to the group. He decided to go find Carol. She had a comforting air about her and he knew he wouldn't have to say much to her to get her to understand.

Daryl was on his way to Lacy's cell after visiting Beth again. He had told her through the door that Lacy was talking that she was moving around. He was trying to give Beth hope. She had thanked him for checking on Lacy for her. He went along with it as if that's all he was doing but he knew it wasn't. He had a feeling Beth knew too but she was kind enough not to point it out. Daryl was confused as he turned towards Lacy's cell and saw people in front of the door.

"We have to help her" Carol pleaded looking at Rick with demanding eyes.

"What are we supposed to do knock her out?" Rick asked defensively.

"If that's what it takes!" Carol shot back. Daryl quickened his pace trying to figure out what was wrong.

"Hey, what's this about?" Daryl asked as he reached them. They both turned confused eyes on him. Carols light up with understanding when she recognized Daryl and he gave her a stabbing glare to tell her to keep her mouth shut. He waved off Ricks wondering glances and they both knew better than to say anything about his presence after that. Just then Daryl saw Lacy smack into the glass and collapse.

"What the fuck" Daryl said jumping and running to the window to peer in. He saw a bloody bruised Lacy panting and shrieking. There were shards of glass or something all around her and cuts all over her body. Her face was smeared with blood and she looked ferocious as she hollered. The noise was muffled but her teeth were bared and she had wild eyes. Daryl looked back to Rick standing on his other side now he saw three gashes across his face. Daryl made for the door but Rick put a hand up. Daryl felt rage building. He was mad at himself, mad at Rick, mad at God. He was beginning to feel all that was under the surface bubbling up.

"What? Are ya just going to let her kill herself in there?" Daryl growled with hate as he stood inches from Rick.

"She's dangerous and volatile." Rick started trying to talk Daryl down with a hand up in front of him still.

"I can handle her." Daryl tried

"No I can't risk anyone else's life we have lost too many already."

"Just let me try and…"

"No Daryl" Rick said firmly cutting him off. Daryl lost control then feeling every second pass by like the ticking of a bomb. They were wasting time. They needed to help her NOW.

"The FUCK is wrong with ya? Ya'd rather let her die then get a few scratches on yer pretty little face? I can handle her okay?" Daryl was out raged that Rick was in his path. Carol jumped in trying to diffuse the two men.

"What if we go get Beth? She might be able to talk Lacy down."

"No we can't expose her to Lacy we need her with the kids and she can't go back to them once she's been near any of us." Rick said looking at Carol with clear frustration. He was trying to find answers but Daryl already knew how to handle this. He was done discussing it as he decided this he saw her throw her body into the window and bounce off of it again. The sound of her body hitting the glass made Daryl grit his teeth. His heart was pounding in his chest and he growled deep in his throat

"Get out of my way Rick or I'll go through you." Ricks eyes widened at Daryl's threat and as he opened his mouth to say something Carol grabbed Ricks arm and pulled him aside whispering something to him. Daryl fumbled with his keys as he unlocked the door. He stepped in with his knees bent and his arms ready he approached her carefully eyeing her as she spun to see who had entered. Her eyes lit when she recognized him.

"LET ME OUT, I CANT BREATH IN HERE!" She screamed tugging on her hair.

"Calm down." Daryl pleaded stepping slowly towards her afraid that approaching to quickly would frighten her in this mental state.

"NO! I need out I need out now! He can't keep me in this basement anymore!" Daryl ignored her clear confusion about her location and continued slowly approaching her glancing to the window to see Rick watching with his hands on his hips and Carol covering her mouth with one hand and clutching her chest with the other. Daryl was almost close enough to grab here when she shrieked at him.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" He felt the sting of her nails slicing across his forearm but he didn't care he threw his arms around her immediately while she was still outstretched towards him. He held her close to his chest feeling how much of her strength she had regained as she fought against him. She was thrashing in every direction kicking her legs out and screeching. He fought hard to keep a hold on her and after what seemed like forever she collapsed into him he felt her full body weight suddenly and had to quickly correct his stance to hold her up. She was sobbing into his shoulder between broken breaths and he began comforting her immediately forgetting that the others were watching.

"Yer okay" he cooed into her ear stroking her hair and laying his head against her hair. The blood from her face was smearing on to his shirt as she wrapped her arms around him.

"Im sorry" she sobbed into him and his throat tightened again. He wasn't going to leave her in there anymore if she was going to get better it wouldn't be like this.

"Im gonna take ya out a here now." Daryl spoke softly to her. He felt her take in a deep gasp and wrap her arms tighter around him.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Lacy's forehead was against his shoulder but he could feel her mood change abruptly without seeing her face. Suddenly the energy rolling off her was powerfully hopeful. He knew he was about to get hell from Rick and he didn't know where he would take her but he would figure it out later. All he knew was he wasn't going to let her die like this.

Daryl had a guiding hand on Lacy's lower back and she walked close to him through the door. He saw her shoulders shaking and her eyes beaming with so much more life than he had seen all week

"Daryl." Rick began but he stopped speaking immediately when he was met with Daryl's cold hard stare. Daryl thought he could feel his anger shooting like bullets from his eyes.

"Step back." He said with as much contempt as the last words he had spoken to Rick. Ricks mouth was a gape as he seemed at a loss. Daryl looked straight ahead swirling around his emotions in his mind. Then suddenly he knew exactly where to take her.


	16. Full of Thunder

Daryl and Lacy stepped outside of the prison walls side by side to face a dark gray sky. Lacy had expected sunshine and heat like she knew Georgia always was but this air tasted so much sweeter. They moisture in the air was thick and the breeze smelled of rain. A smile cut across her face and a weight that had seemed so unbearable lifted away into the swirling gray sky. Daryl looked around uncomfortably before looking back to the door.

"C'mon, it's gonna rain." His southern growl was almost lost behind the booming ripples of thunder that crashed through the air. Lacy's smile widened as she looked back to her savior. Lacy's mind was stumbling to keep up with her sudden alertness. Again she wanted to run for miles just like the day she had kissed Beth. She was reeling with pent up energy from her inward retreat. She knew she was becoming lost to her bipolar swings, she knew that being sick and being trapped had sent her so far into her own personal hell that she hadn't thought she could come back but she wasn't done fighting.

"No let's stay." Daryl saw Lacy's eyes gleaming brightly through her pale and tired features as a flash of lightening tore through the darkness and cast entrancing shadows across her full lips.

"You're already sick..." He began while motioning to the door before Lacy cut him off.

"Exactly. I'm already sick so let's enjoy the rain." Daryl looked at her defeated. He didn't want to see the others right now his outrage and contempt hadn't dispersed yet. He looked at the still bloody gashes on Lacy's face and arms and he felt his gut lurch. He didn't blame them, all the anger and resentment he felt towards them was misplaced and he knew it. He blamed himself. He should have known immediately that letting her be locked in there wasn't the right thing to do. He hadn't told them that she was claustrophobic. He STILL hadn't told them, but he knew and leaving her there was on him. Large raindrops began sprinkling down on them. Each drop cold on Lacy's feverish skin felt like tiny pin pricks reawakening her. She had been so deep within herself. She was lost but she began to resurface. She felt like herself and every drop of rain made her feel brand new. She lifted her face to the rain and closed her eyes. Daryl wiped the wetness of his arm and shifted his weight looking around him. He didn't know what to look at or what to say. When he lifted his head he saw Lacy looking at him. She stepped closer and laid a hand on his bicep.

"Just close your eyes."

"What?" he shot back defensively with a slight flinch. His body screamed for him to run away but he didn't want to break the contact she was making.

"Shh. Stop thinking so much. Just close your eyes and feel the rain. Feel each drop and let it wash you away, the way it washes away the earth." Daryl looked at Lacy skeptically. She smiled reassuringly and with her hand still on his arm she turned her face upward again and closed her eyes. He watched as she took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. A rain drop landed on her forehead and trickled down along her nose to her chin. He followed it with his eyes and saw how her freckles looked so much darker in this light. Daryl sighed and followed her example closing his eyes and tilting his head back. He felt ridiculous but as each raindrop landed and he began focusing on the sensation he started to understand. The two of them stood there letting go of all that they carried the pain they shared. When Daryl opened his eyes he saw Lacy's eyes on him.

"What?" He asked quietly.

"You're beautiful Daryl Dixon." Daryl snorted and crossed his arms over his chest breaking her grip on him.

"I aint nothin' sure as hell aint no pretty boy." Lacy tucked some of her wild red hair behind her ear and shook her head in amusement.

"I didn't say you were pretty. I said you are beautiful. Your soul. I can see it in your eyes when you smile. I can see it in your hands when you're working. I can see it in you all the time." Lacy looked down bashfully before continuing.

"I'm sorry; I know you might not understand what I'm trying to say. I don't know if I understand what I'm trying to say. I believe in auras and souls I've always been good at reading people and I'm rarely wrong but you have such a powerful guard up, I didn't see it at first. There is something about you. The real you. It's just… "Lacy trailed off looking for the right word. So many came to mind, breathe taking, beautiful, brilliant. She finally settled on a word

"..Eminent." Daryl studied her as she spoke feeling the heat from her body standing so close to his. He felt a shiver as a rain drop hit his neck. Daryl was silent for a long moment before attempting to say what he had been thinking about for the last 24 hours.

"Im sorry bout what ya been through. I know what it's like… " Daryl looked troubled as he tried to open up to Lacy and she didn't want to push him so she waited patiently for him to find the words he was looking for. After a long moment he turned away from her. He moved quickly and aggressively as if he was throwing himself into it. He reached over his head and grabbed his shirt hiking it up over his head. Lacy's gasped quietly and lifted her hand to her mouth as her eyes roamed over his scared and mutilated back. Suddenly it all made sense. His closed off nature, the way he shied from her touch a moment ago but most of all why he hadn't turned away from her after reading her journal. He quickly pulled his shirt back into place and tucked his hands into his arm pits standing in front of her he felt naked. He didn't show his back to anyone. He worked to keep it a secret from the group. Herschel was one of the few who knew about it. He had patched Daryl up back at his farm and had learned about it back then. Daryl wasn't a fool he knew part of the reason he felt so close to Herschel was that level of confidentiality. Herschel knew and regardless of it he cared for Daryl. He understood. It was something Daryl didn't experience often. Lacy was like him. He had given her this piece of himself to try and make up for taking away her choice when it came to opening up to him. He had decided for her and that was something he knew he wouldn't have taken kindly to. He didn't regret it but he felt a strange guilt. Lacy's heart was in her throat as she stepped closer to him again. She ignored his tense shoulders and pulled his arms away from his chest with little resistance. She laid her head on his chest and leaned into him. She took in his scent and his warmth trying to commit them to memory. Slowly he raised his arms and laid them gently on her shoulders. Lacy looked up at him and saw he was gazing down towards her too.

"What are you?" He asked softly with mixed emotion in his voice. He looked at her as though she wasn't real. This moment didn't seem possible.

"I'm just red" Lacy whispered back. Before she could think about it she stood on her toes and pressed her lips into Daryl's. The kiss was hard and short and full of thunder. She felt like the storm inside her was whirling out of her a tornado of pain and regrets. She had been waiting her whole life, waiting for something that she couldn't find and then as her lips hit Daryl's she thought for a moment maybe she was done waiting. Maybe now she could really live. When she pulled away from Daryl he had grown rigid and his eyes were wide. He stayed perfectly still and said nothing. Lacy's heart raced and she worried that she had done something wrong again. Then as she was readying to apologize he leaned into her again his warm lips crashing over hers as more lightening shot across the sky. It was raining much more heavily now. Both of them were soaked through. His scruff was like sandpaper against her skin but she didn't care. His strength made her feel strong again. Their lips moved together for a long sweet the kiss ended Lacy gazed up in disbelief.

"Thought I was gonna lose ya." Daryl mumbled embarrassed and hesitant. Lacy felt words coming to her lips before she had time to think them. Words that weren't her won but felt true.

"I cant die. So many things have tried, My father, the walkers, hunger, sickness. I couldn't even kill myself. I tried more times than I care to admit and I know now that I cant die. Even if I wanted to."

A noise to their left drew them apart immediately. They both jumped a foot away and looked quickly towards the now open prison door. Maggie stood their mouth a gap. She seemed more surprised than even they were at what she had just witnessed.

"Ah, sorry, wrong door." She mumbled before closing the door with a thud. Daryl covered his face with his dirty hands and pushed his long hair back. He shook it forcefully sending water in all directions and then he darted back into the prison leaving Lacy to stand alone.


	17. Gratitude

Lacy stood outside as the rain continued to fall, the crashing of the thunder growing more distant now. The ghost of Daryl's warmth made her feel so incredibly alone. She wanted to go after him. She wanted to ask him why he had left so abruptly. Had it been because of Maggie or was it something she had done. She stared at the door to the prison through the thick sheets of rain seeing how the light danced through the water casting strange glares and shadows that made the door appear to be shifting in size and shape. Standing only 20 feet away the door seemed to be impossibly far from her, growing farther ad father away the longer she gazed at it. She knew she couldn't go back in even if she had wanted to, which she very truly didn't, and she had no idea if and when Daryl would be back. As she looked around her Lacy's eyes fell on the area of the prison fences she had helped fortify. It was only a portion of the fence and not much more had been completed since then. So much else had been happening the fences had fallen on the back burner. Lacy knew then exactly what she could do with her time.

Lacy felt her feet sinking into the soft ground and her pants quickly became coated in mud up to her knees as she pulled her feet loose from the grounds suction and splattered mud up her legs. She couldn't care less about the cold chill that had set in or the filth that coated her as she took to completing her task. She was done being a burden she was going to do something to help. She was going to do something that mattered and with no one out there to stop her Lacy felt certain she would get it all done. She began her search of the prison grounds gathering up all that was left of the wooden beams and rubble so that she could begin her task. The weight of the debris was putting a lot of strain on her sore and bruised body but Lacy's internal fire burned away any sensation of pain. Her breath was labored as she pushed herself farther and farther along the fence jamming the beams into the softened earth and forcing them up against the chain link. Lacy thought for a moment that she was fortunate that it was raining. It had been much more difficult to drive the supports into the ground when it was dry. Lacy slipped a few times as she worked muddying up her arms and torso as she forced herself back onto her feet each time. She ripped a splinter free from her palm and whipped her bloodied hands on her dirty pants as she took a moment to catch her breath. Lacy looked up at the sky seeing the clouds beginning to grow lighter and the rain beginning to lighten. The storm was passing and Lacy was feeling unusually strong. 'You can do this' she told herself as she looked at what was left of this portion of the fence. She forced herself to keep moving to keep going as long as she could. She was placing her last beam when she began to slip on the mud again. Catching herself on the chain link and trying to correct her stance she looked back over her shoulder. Carol was standing at the prison door with a tent in her hands and awe on her face. Lacy quickly shoved the beam into place and turned back toward Carols petite figure.

"Lacy, did you do all of this?" Carols voice was so warm and gentle it whispered through the air like the sun that was coming out of the clouds finally. Lacy didn't answer her she just looked back at the 100 feet of fence now reinforced every 5 feet with metal poles, wooden beams and anything else lacy could find to help strengthen it. She pulled at her mud caked shirt that was sticking to her body and pushed a dirty hand through her matted wet hair. Carol stepped forward delicately; she glided as she moved as if the slipper ground couldn't possibly bring her down. Lacy instinctively stepped backwards as Carol stepped forwards causing Carol to stop moving and look down at the ground.

"I'm sick, stay back." Lacy hoped her meek explanation would insure carol that her distance wasn't personal.

"I have a feeling that those of us who aren't sick aren't going to get sick. We have been trying to quarantine the ill but everyone has been exposed one way or another. I've been in Death row. I've been around Daryl who's been around you. If it were going to happen it would have by now. " Carol stepped forward again and this time Lacy stayed put. Carol set down the tent against the prison wall and approached Lacy confidently.

"Lacy are you okay?" Lacy looked into Carol's sweet face and saw the laugh lines that made her only look gentler.

"I don't know." Lacy answered honestly. Carol didn't speak instead she pulled Lacy into a soft warm hug ignoring her filth and stench as she comforted her. After a moment carol stepped back and began speaking again with her hands still on Lacy's shoulders.

"I brought you a tent. Well Daryl asked me to bring it to you. It's his. I can help you set it up and I can get you some dry clothes." Carol searched Lacy's eyes for something but Lacy kept darting them away.

"Where is Daryl?" Lacy asked meekly.

"He and Rick are having a … discussion." Lacy felt incredible guilt hit her. She didn't want to drive a wedge between those men. She didn't want to be responsible for putting strain on a relationship that was so vital to this group. She knew how close they were the second she met them in the woods she saw how they communicated silently and how they moved around each other in such a harmony it would seem they had known each other their whole lives.

"Oh carol, I'm so sorry. All I do is cause trouble. I don't want to be responsible for them fighting. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore. I just want to earn my place I want to be worth saving." Lacy felt tears coming to her eyes and she fought them back down swallowing hard and breathing deeply.

"Sweetie" Carol laid a hand on Lacy's cheek forcing her to look into Carols eyes while she spoke.

"You aren't doing anything wrong. Look at what you have done out here. Look at how much you have accomplished all on your own. You're sick, you're tired, you're in pain and you could have easily done nothing. You didn't have to build up these fences, you didn't have to do anything at all but you did. You are trying to protect us even now when it must feel like we have turned out backs on you. You had only just gotten here when this illness began its spread. You didn't have the chance to know any of us all that well and yet you're still out hear fighting for us, fighting for our home and our safety. I can promise you that you have earned more than a place in this group you have earned our love. We are a family now. All of us. There used to be a phrase, you can't pick your family, but you can. You can and we have. Rick and Daryl are like brothers, no matter what they might fight about that isn't going to change. They have fought before. Actions speak louder than words and no matter what they might say in the heat of the moment they have risked more than their lives for each other too many times to let anything rip them apart." Lacy couldn't hold back her tears anymore she leaned into Carols small frame though Carol was shorter than her. It felt nice to be held to feel loved. Lacy wondered what her mother's arms would have felt like would they have been as warm as Carol's. Lacy hadn't thought about it long before she spoke.

"I never knew my mother and my father he …. He wasn't family when I did have him. I've been alone most of my life I don't know how to be a part of a family. I was in so many foster homes. I ran away. I lived on the streets for a time. Even as a young adult I was alone. I'm so scared of messing this up. I don't deserve this kindness you're showing me I don't deserve to be here." Lacy's self doubt was pulling her heart down into her gut.

"Stop that talk right now. I won't hear it. You are so much more like Daryl than he even realizes. The two of you are stronger than the rest of us. You two have been fighting your whole lives the rest of us are still adjusting. We learn from you. I came out here and saw what you were doing and I wanted to be like you. I wanted to have your strength. I'm working on it and I'm not the fragile woman I was when this all began but I have a ways to go still. You deserve to be happy Lacy, I know it's scary to trust someone I know it's hard to open up but you have to try, what do you have to lose?" Lacy listened to carols words and whipped away the last of her tears. She was done crying, she was done feeling bad about herself. She was going to be the strong woman Carol believed her to be, She was going to be everything Carol told her she was if only to prove to herself that she could be. Lacy tilted her head back and let out a sigh before meeting Carols eyes again.

"I can do this." She affirmed with a nod as she watched for Carol's next move. Carol looked again at the fence and smiled her small lips like flower petals on her soft face.

"Come on sweetie lets set this tent up and then I can help you clean up those cuts. " Lacy looked at the shallow cuts on her arms from the porcelain shard and the scuffs and jabs in her hands from her work. She was reminded now of the small throb in her temple and she nodded to Carol her consent. Carol and Lacy had taken to setting up the tent along the wall that Lacy used to climb to the roof. She was considering dragging it up there later when carol wasn't around. Some part of her wanted to keep that roof hers and Daryl's secret place so far the two of them had been the only ones to go up there and to her it felt safe it felt like her sanctuary and she wasn't ready to bring anyone else into that. Once the tent was set and the fire pit built Carol began cleaning Lacy's wounds. Lacy sat cross legged on the concrete with her eyes closed as Carol dabbed at her forehead with a damp rag. They sat in silence for a while before Carol began speaking almost to herself.

"When this outbreak started I was married. Ed. He was a brute and a tyrant and the more I think about it now the more I can't understand why I stayed with him as long as I did. We had a daughter together, her name was Sophia. She was the light of my life. Some women were born to be mothers and that's how I felt. Once I had Sophia I felt like I had found my purpose. After her father died and it was just her and I things didn't seem so bad. It was almost worth this apocalypse to have her to myself to make sure she was loved and cared for in ways I couldn't before. I had always been teetering on the tip of a knife trying to balance being a mother to Sophia and being a wife to Ed, he was demanding, he became violent quickly. I had to fight to keep her safe. Without that over my head I was given the most beautiful months of my life. My sweetest memories of her had a price though. One day we were overrun by walkers on the road and the group scattered trying to stay alive. She got split off from me and the rest of the group in the chaos and got lost in the woods. I was so broken by it. I didn't sleep, I hardly ate. All I could think about was her lying alone on the forest floor cold and scared. Daryl was still butting heads with Rick a lot back then and it made things in the group a little tense but when she went missing he spent days and days looking for her in the woods. He was more committed to finding her than anyone else. He followed her trails and searched buildings; he brought me back her doll. He hardly slept himself. He ended up getting stabbed by his own arrow and shot by another group member in the process and he still tried to keep looking for her as soon as he could walk. Eventually we found her but we were too late. She had turned and in some ways I think it hurt him as much as it hurt me to learn that fact. Daryl is a good man but he just can't see it. He blamed himself for her death for a long time. Now that you're here at the prison I'm seeing something change in him again. He's found something new to pour his heart into the way he poured it into looking for Sophia. Every night that you spent in that cell Daryl visited you. He stayed for hours because he had to know you were okay."

Carol seemed to have stopped speaking for a moment so Lacy took a chance to jump in. She was reeling at the thought of Daryl visiting her so often. Her memory of the last week was so foggy and sporadic but as she thought about it fragments of consciousness returned. She recalled being carried, being held and cared for. She realized Herschel had been to see her too. Lacy's heart filled to the brim with a new wave of intense gratitude it was almost over wondered how Carol knew all this she hadn't expected Daryl and her to be so close but in a way it seemed fitting.

"Why are you telling me all of this?" Lacy asked curiously. She was deeply riveted by learning what Carol wanted to tell her but wasn't sure what Carols motivations were.

"I'm telling you all of this because I know he won't. I want you to know the man Daryl really is not the man he thinks he is." Lacy felt Carols dabbing continue now on her arms and she let her eyes fall on the clean clothes set aside for her. Carols motherly care was precise and skilled. Lacy felt a stab of pain for Sophia, a little girl she had never met and yet felt her absence now distinctly.

"We kissed." Lacy said quietly. She didn't know why she said it but she needed to tell somebody and allowing Carol inside her walls as scary as it was felt alarmingly tranquilizing.

"You and Daryl kissed?" Carol stopped her movements for a moment leaning back to look into Lacy's face. She questioned Lacy with humor trying to cover her shock.

"In the rain" Lacy added bashfully seeing in her mind his dripping hair and piercing blue eyes.

"Daryl Dixon kissing a girl in the rain? Now that's something. It's honestly not that surprising I had a feeling he was a secret mush ball."Carol continued where she had left off in a nonchalant way. Lacy couldn't help a giggle.

"Oh yeah? Whys that?" Carol smiled turning Lacy's arms over delicately, inspecting for more cuts. Lacy felt a certain shyness as Carols eyes roamed over her scars on the inside of her wrists. Scars that couldn't be mistaken for anything but what they truly were.

"He brought me a flower once." Lacy's eyes widened and she immediately started giggling at the thought of Daryl picking shyness washed away as Carol moved along as if she had seen nothing.

"You're kidding!"

"It was back when we were still looking for Sophia. He picked a Cherokee rose for me. I was crying in the Rv that we had at the time and he came in after looking for her for hours. Do you know the story of the Cherokee rose?" Carol looked to Lacy for an answer she shook her head now before Carol continued.

"When American soldiers where moving the Indians across the trail of tears a lot of their children died along the way. The exposure to the elements left a lot of the mothers grieving without their children, so the tribe leaders said a prayer asking for hope. The next day the white flowers began growing from the soil where the mother's tears had fallen. He told me that story when he gave me the rose and I was so touched. I knew he was a big mush ball in a hard shell after that." Lacy couldn't help her smile as she pictured what Carol described. She herself had seen some of Daryl's tenderness.

"Maggie came out of the prison right when we kissed and he left immediately after. I don't know maybe it was a fluke but I'm glad it happened." Carol sat facing Lacy now their knees almost touching as they talked together.

"A fluke? With Daryl? No way. He was probably just embarrassed anyone but you saw. He'll come back around just give him time." Carol was so reassuring Lacy was feeling in rough shape physically but her spirits felt higher than ever and she wondered now why she hadn't spoken with Carol like this sooner.

"Thank you" Lacy said with as much sincerity as she could.

"There's nothing to thank me for Lacy" Carol said with a shrug. Lacy wouldn't let her thanks be brushed off though since leaving death row she had been feeling nothing but thankful and she wanted to show it.

"No I'm serious Carol, Thank you for listening to me, for telling me these stories, for everything. I haven't been thankful enough since you all found me and I'm going to be from now on." Carol pursed her lips for a minute understanding now that this was how Lacy was healing.

"Alright, then you're welcome and I mean that." Lacy nodded her head already sure that she was going to take Carol up on her offer. Carol stood up now pushing off her knees and Lacy followed.

"I better head back in. I'll send Daryl your way if I see him."

"Don't push him. If he wants to come back he will." Lacy said with doubt. Carol just shook her head and smiled as she walked for the door that lead into the prison. Lacy looked at her living area and then up at the roof. For the night she might just stay down here. Lacy's stomach grumbled loudly. She was growing very hungry and weak. The idea felt a little risky but if she could find a way to get her bow she could go pick some raspberries in the woods. She just had to figure out where it was and how to get to it.


End file.
